How can I overcome a masturbation addiction?

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Yeah I cannot go for 3 days without giving in. I used to be like 3 times a day…its a horrible sin…I find it literally impossible to stop. I think its all in the brain. Its hardwired into us from bad events in our lives and we use it as an OCD behavior to relieve stress.

Praying to Jesus and Fasting I think is the trick to beating it
 
mjb472012 said:
This is something I’ve really been struggling with. I go to confession every week mainly for this sin alone. I know why its a sin and I know it’s mortal, but my body feels like its addicted. If I go any longer than a few days, I feel really agitated and “horny” (sorry for lack of a better term.)
I’m almost 25 years old, and I’ve been doing this almost everyday since i was 12. (2-4 times a day) I recently converted to Catholicism this past April. (Easter Vigil Mass)
I can sometimes go for a week without doing it, but by then my body is driving me crazy. I’m almost constantly aroused by then, and I finally just give into temptation. I feel guilty afterwards because I know I’ve offended God and misused what sex was designed for, but I feel SO much better physically. What should I do? Should I just do my best, hold off as long as I can, and then confess when I finally cave? I feel bad after I do it and then confess, because I know in a few days to a week, I’m just going to do it again. I dont want to, but I cant help it. :confused:
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I’m almost 26, and have been struggling with this since I was about 10. I’m female too, which many people think we don’t struggle as much, but that just isn’t true. At the most I can go about 3 weeks, but then after that I crash and burn badly. I think right now, the best thing to do is to try and figure out what is triggering you, whether that be emotional, physical (being bored, not exercising, etc.) or whatever else. When you find the trigger, minimizing or eliminating the trigger will help immensely. Keep receiving the sacraments and praying. Go to Mass as often as possible. Spend as much time as you can with our Eucharistic Lord in Adoration. Pray the rosary; read Sacred Scripture. I know whenever I suffer a relapse, I always make the mistake of not picking myself up right away and stop praying as much. Don’t let yourself get into this mindset.

I’ve yet to figure out what is triggering me, so I still see a battle ahead for me as well. 🤷 Keep me in your prayers, and I’ll definitely keep you in mine.
 
I’m speaking as a person that is currently learning about being a good catholic. I’m currently a 21 year old female that would do that a lot a few months back, but when I realized it was wrong, then I slowly but surely kicked the habit. It wasn’t easy, but what helped me is getting rid of the source and putting that excess energy to use in exercising, learning how to be healthier, etc. At first it wasn’t easy, because I didn’t want to admit it was wrong. It honestly took me a while to do so, but one day I decided that enough is enough and no more, so I focused more on other things that are more important to me like work, education, and health.

And to be honest, I feel better than I ever have about myself. I also had the extra motivation to change that when I realized that both my boyfriend and I having that addiction didn’t really help to keep us together. I felt insecure because he’d look at other women in such an intimate form and he really hated himself for doing it. It’s just no good when you’re trying to make a relationship work and when you know it’s not morally right. Either way, pornography/fantasies/etc., only put unrealistic expectations for sex, and that could eventually lead to you falling apart with a person you value very much. I’ve seen it time and time again when a woman or man in a relationship feel insecure about themselves because they cant seem to satisfy their partner’s needs simply because their partner holds unrealistic expectations for them.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, just get rid of the source and focus all of that energy into something more productive and useful to you. It’s not an easy process when you go cold turkey in any addiction, but the results in the end are soooo worth it. You’ll feel so much better and feel so much closer to God when you’re not giving your attention to something that is so harmful to oneself.

Edit: Keep praying and going to mass and doing things that make you feel closer to God, WHILE you find other things you can focus on. The more things you have helping you, the better the chance of you beating the addiction. 🙂
 
You’ll out grow it as your hormones lessen. It’s normal, but if that is not good enough. Put religious items, pictures, etc where you might masturbate and remove anything that leads to it. Pray more. Focus your energy on something else. Help others and find something else to occupy your time.
 
mjb472012 said:
This is something I’ve really been struggling with. I go to confession every week mainly for this sin alone. I know why its a sin and I know it’s mortal, but my body feels like its addicted. If I go any longer than a few days, I feel really agitated and “horny” (sorry for lack of a better term.)
I’m almost 25 years old, and I’ve been doing this almost everyday since i was 12. (2-4 times a day) I recently converted to Catholicism this past April. (Easter Vigil Mass)
I can sometimes go for a week without doing it, but by then my body is driving me crazy. I’m almost constantly aroused by then, and I finally just give into temptation. I feel guilty afterwards because I know I’ve offended God and misused what sex was designed for, but I feel SO much better physically. What should I do? Should I just do my best, hold off as long as I can, and then confess when I finally cave? I feel bad after I do it and then confess, because I know in a few days to a week, I’m just going to do it again. I dont want to, but I cant help it. :confused:
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Continue to confess this. Add prayer to your life too. I think my masterbation problem was venial because if I had no other sins I would go to mass and feel better. Anyway when I added prayer once I felt like something was unwinding. Then I felt as if my masterbation was a habit or something habitual and I didn’t feel the need. Sometimes I slip up but I am not going back. I will continue ahead until I never do this. Don’t be down on yourself or beat yourself up. EWTN’s website has some devotionals that I picked that I like. Definately continue confession. If your sin is venial it will still be forgiven. Also venial sins are forgiven just by going to mass. You might talk to you priest about moral culpability.

Good luck!

Oh yes I might add. Try the Novena of the miraculous medal and the litany of humility. I like those two.
 
billcu1 said:
Continue to confess this. Add prayer to your life too. I think my masterbation problem was venial because if I had no other sins I would go to mass and feel better. Anyway when I added prayer once I felt like something was unwinding. Then I felt as if my masterbation was a habit or something habitual and I didn’t feel the need. Sometimes I slip up but I am not going back. I will continue ahead until I never do this. Don’t be down on yourself or beat yourself up. EWTN’s website has some devotionals that I picked that I like. Definately continue confession. If your sin is venial it will still be forgiven. Also venial sins are forgiven just by going to mass. You might talk to you priest about moral culpability.

Good luck!

Oh yes I might add. Try the Novena of the miraculous medal and the litany of humility. I like those two. You cannot sin without pride.
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I see lot of wonderful replies to your question.

I would like to give some tips along with sharing my story.

Proper understanding
I always felt guilty whenever I masturbate. The guilt stays for at least few days afterwords. In my opinion, masturbating is a SIN. It is artificial induction of sex and it is to satisfy body pleasure thirst.
In the initial years, I prayed, but I kept an arrogance in avoiding this sin. I mean, after I stop doing it for few months, I felt very happy and pride at the same time that I achieved something on my own. And when I fail the next time, I felt gravely sad that “I” failed. This seems to be a wrong approach or understanding and it hurt my health.
Explore and believe in the life without masturbation.

Praying for God the Mighty’s Help
First of all, PRAYER for that cause is the most important thing to do. I mean praying to seek help from God.
Key thing is praying for the help of God in guiding you on this, and if you succeed for weeks and months, keep thanking God for the success and do not boast yourself.
Also if you fail, the guilt has to be a proper one. It should not be totally targeted to the “I” part of “I failed”. You see what I mean right.

Please read these quotes and verses below carefully:
**St Leo **says, Man does no good which God does not assist him to do. St. Francis of Assissi says - Without prayer, no fruit can be expected from the soul. A Bible verse - Unless the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it. Unless the Lord keep the city, he watcheth in vain that keepeth it. Psalms 126:1

We should avoid fueling the sexual feeling the wrong way
If you are serious about getting away from this sin, you will find ways to avoid getting into temptations. Some elusive temptations are, movies with passionate sex scenes or videos, pornographic sort of stuffs on the net, bad magazines, enjoying looking at immodest ladies, etc. When one masturbates, mind will think of some events and things to feed this act. So try to remember these and avoid them.
We should rather fill our mind with reading spiritual or good books, helping people in need, writing articles, taking a friend to library or coffee shop for a sitting, going for reasonable vacations with people who cannot afford vacationing, more time in Gym, etc.

Good further tips - Associating the sinful act with a penitential act
One of my friend used to do this when it happens in dreams and nights. When you stop this habit of masturbating, then in the following days, in the nights, in the subconscious mind, it will try to bring back some scenarios and push you to ejaculate.
Whether this happens in the night subconsciously or in the daytime consciously, this is a good tip.
Do penance the next day (not immediately afterwards). Leave the day or night that this happens and do penance the next day. This should make your mind tightly associate this penance to the act of this sin yesterday or last night. Penance could be simpler. The objective is to feel it really hard. Simple things could be like, not eating cheese for a day, supposing I cannot go a meal without cheese. Similarly, do not engage in something that you like the most normally and regularly. Or do some good thing you hate the most, for example talking to our mother for a long time supposing we do not like talking to her at all. You can simply fast a meal, if that is what going to make a great impression. You will find lots of ideas for yourself, if you are serious about this. Whatever you come up with, the bottom line is, know and believe that it is our God who gave you that working idea through the Holy Spirit in response to your seek.

Are you married?
If you are married, share with your spouse about this. Improving the Christian love between ourselves and our spouses will do some miracles.

Conclusion
Out of ALL, Praying with this target for the assistance of God, crediting God for successful days, taking proper Guilt when you fail, associating a penitential act to this sinful act, etc are keys to success.
This idea is helping me a lot nowadays on other sins. God is present in all things. Without God, nothing moves in this world, and so our hands when we masturbate.
So, we get hold of our body (and soul), that God gave us, that God wants to live in, that God gave his life to save, and direct/push this body to do sin. In other words, we take all his stuff (hand, mind, eyes, etc) and come up with sin as outcome.

These are my humble thoughts. My good wishes to you Brother
 
I struggle wih this as well, except I’ve been at it for longer, about 19 years. Then ingot turned onto Matt Fradd’s work. I also realized through confession why I kept masturbating and watching pornography. Eucharistic adoration helps, as does prayer too. God bless you brother and I will pray for all of us, and if/when we fail we confess and God will continue to love us.
 
WesleyF said:
Masturbation, although a sin, is a symptom of the real problem. Find out what the underlying problem is and work to eradicate it. I can think of some underlying problems -
  1. laziness, sloth, etc.
  2. lack of love, fellowship, etc.
  3. pride
In your case, it could be any of the above or even something else.
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Lack of a wife, of course.
 
Beautiful_Rose said:
I’m speaking as a person that is currently learning about being a good catholic. I’m currently a 21 year old female that would do that a lot a few months back, but when I realized it was wrong, then I slowly but surely kicked the habit. It wasn’t easy, but what helped me is getting rid of the source and putting that excess energy to use in exercising, learning how to be healthier, etc. At first it wasn’t easy, because I didn’t want to admit it was wrong. It honestly took me a while to do so, but one day I decided that enough is enough and no more, so I focused more on other things that are more important to me like work, education, and health.

And to be honest, I feel better than I ever have about myself. I also had the extra motivation to change that when I realized that both my boyfriend and I having that addiction didn’t really help to keep us together. I felt insecure because he’d look at other women in such an intimate form and he really hated himself for doing it. It’s just no good when you’re trying to make a relationship work and when you know it’s not morally right. Either way, pornography/fantasies/etc., only put unrealistic expectations for sex, and that could eventually lead to you falling apart with a person you value very much. I’ve seen it time and time again when a woman or man in a relationship feel insecure about themselves because they cant seem to satisfy their partner’s needs simply because their partner holds unrealistic expectations for them.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, just get rid of the source and focus all of that energy into something more productive and useful to you. It’s not an easy process when you go cold turkey in any addiction, but the results in the end are soooo worth it. You’ll feel so much better and feel so much closer to God when you’re not giving your attention to something that is so harmful to oneself.

Edit: Keep praying and going to mass and doing things that make you feel closer to God, WHILE you find other things you can focus on. The more things you have helping you, the better the chance of you beating the addiction. 🙂
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This might sound harsh, but I mean it seriously.

I wonder if men and women who are not intimate should talk about this with each other.

Personally, I think the women should talk with the women and the men with the men.

I was fine on this thread, then I see two females talking about their problems and I immediately become antsy.

Now, obviously, some of this is me - but some of it is that this is something that should be discussed with members of the same sex, I think.
 
mjb472012 said:
This is something I’ve really been struggling with. I go to confession every week mainly for this sin alone. I know why its a sin and I know it’s mortal, but my body feels like its addicted. If I go any longer than a few days, I feel really agitated and “horny” (sorry for lack of a better term.)
I’m almost 25 years old, and I’ve been doing this almost everyday since i was 12. (2-4 times a day) I recently converted to Catholicism this past April. (Easter Vigil Mass)
I can sometimes go for a week without doing it, but by then my body is driving me crazy. I’m almost constantly aroused by then, and I finally just give into temptation. I feel guilty afterwards because I know I’ve offended God and misused what sex was designed for, but I feel SO much better physically. What should I do? Should I just do my best, hold off as long as I can, and then confess when I finally cave? I feel bad after I do it and then confess, because I know in a few days to a week, I’m just going to do it again. I dont want to, but I cant help it. :confused:
Click to expand...
Here is a website that will help.

catholicbridge.com/catholic/masturbation.php
 
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