How can I resist masturbation and go to confession?

  • Thread starter Thread starter seekinglight1
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
S

seekinglight1

Guest
So I’ve been trying harder recently to resist the temptation to masturbate especially now that it’s Lent. I started by going to confession but a week later gave in to the temptation. After some prayer I went to a confession the next day (which is now today) but later that same day I couldn’t resist again and fell to the urge. What should I do now? I don’t really want to be presumptuous by going to confession immediately, but is that what I should do? Even more importantly, how can I resist the temptation, since it clearly seems to be a more difficult habit than I thought?
 
What worked for me was the humility of having to confess that, and the fact that it’s results bring no good whatsoever ever.

Some methods that helped, or may have helped me:
  • When you feel temptations go into populated areas (preferably around family)
  • Also go away from your phone, computer, whatever the source of the material used comes from.
  • A website blocker, and an accountability partner may also be a good idea (I have no experience with either though)
  • Also fighting the temptations is good, but I find just like with intrusive thoughts, the harder you try to fight them, the stronger they get. So perhaps it’s best to find something that can distract you instantly. Like conversations with someone, or anything that involves concentration.
This article may also be helpful:


—————————————————————————————
I hope maybe some of this helps, have a nice day. And God Bless.
 
Last edited:
I’m going to try a website blocker for sure. I’ve heard some other advice about possibly getting a spiritual advisor or praying the rosary every day which sound like potentially great ideas. In the meantime though, would it be weird to go to confession again having seen the priest just a day earlier with the same sin, how do I confess again knowing I whether or not I won’t fall so easily to the temptation again?
 
That’s maybe a question for someone else or your priest. I’m afraid I can’t answer that.

But to my understanding temptation is not a sin. So I’d maybe say don’t worry about being tempted and continue to fight them.
 
Last edited:
Honestly what helped me was to just stop trying. For some reason focusing on it so much and feeling so guilty and going to confession constantly just made it a constant presence in my mind and made it harder to avoid. When I stopped seeing it as the worst thing ever it was easier to say no and urges were less.strong and less often. Also knowing you can just go to confession each time does make it easier to do it and also to keep doing it until your next confession because you are dirty anyway and what’s one more sin.

Honestly it’s a natural desire. It’s a lot harder now because we are expected to wait until marriage which today often doesn’t happen until you are thirty. Not nature considering you start being fertile and having sexual desires as a teen and people used to getting married not long after anyway.
 
Talk to a priest. Pray to God for guidance. And yes, go to Confession. For some, a turning away from that specific activity occurs in a relatively short time, for others it takes longer. As long as you keep asking God for help, including every time you are tempted, you are going in the right direction.
 
There are some blocker apps that can help with your phone. You can set your google filter on for your laptop (and that does help), but typically all these filters can be turned off, and even if you don’t use those, your mind can’t be filtered… It’s very similar to addiction except the drug is with you always, so it is indeed a difficult one to master. Prayer helps obviously. Keep a crucifix in your point of vision in whatever room you are alone in. Also devotional scapulars can also help. As with any addiction, use whatever works for you.
 
Occupy your time with other things. Reprioritize your day. Go to confession again, and Pray the Rosary Every Day.
 
Thank you all for your advice. I am going to keep to a resolution to pray a rosary every day, and I will make an appointment for a confession within the next few days. I feel guilty for having to go back so often with this same sin nevertheless.
 
Our Lord finds it extremely difficult (impossible actually) to deny his mother anything. This is due to the fact that she denied him nothing during his earthly life, and because of the deep love he has for her. The first miracle Jesus ever performed was at her request even though he initially had no intentions of doing it - “Woman, what does this have to do with me and with thee? My hour has not yet come.” This give’s Mary an omnipotence in the sense that she can obtain virtually anything she wants from her son. Evidence of this omnipotence can be found in Song of Solomon 6:10: “Who is she that cometh forth as the morning rising, fair as the moon, bright as the sun, terrible as an army set in array?” She is also called Mediatrix of Graces in that God has willed that all graces flow through her hands as she sees fit.

Therefore my advice to you is to cultivate a devotion to the Blessed Mother. Say the rosary DAILY and ask her for the grace to remain chaste. Get up early, light a candle and say it reverently on your knees. Don’t forget to meditate on the mysteries while you’re saying it - if your mind is on one thing, it can’t be on another if you know what I mean. The rosary is literally a weapon to be used against evil and vice. In fact, there is no type of evil that can’t be overcome by saying the rosary. In time, you will acquire the grace, the discipline, and the mental focus necessary to overcome this vice. So, pick up your weapon soldier!
 
Last edited:
Please watch this video about confession with Fr. Mike Schmitz. He explains what confession looks like from the priest’s perspective:

It’s truly a very beautiful and touching video.
 
For one thing don’t count the days. Use the advice above. Throw everything you have a the problem. Vow never to give up. Don’t indulge thoughts in your head. You can identify the fall before it gets there, when you start setting the stage, act then with the Hail Mary.

It is difficult, I know, we all know. That you are here reaching out speaks volumes about you. God loves you.
 
Last edited:
Avoid the near occasions which lead you to commit the sin.
 
Daily Rosary is really helpful. Also a simple prayer “Jesus I trust in you”. Seems to help. Just been my experience. Best regards.
 
Besides prayer and sacraments, and works of charity, cultivate a devotion to both Our Lady and St. Joseph, her Most Chaste Spouse. Also, having previously gone four years without relations with my wife (after the birth of our third child – health and other concerns), without falling, I can attest that it is possible, by God’s grace – it actually gets easier the longer you go (as you condition your body to go without). God bless.
 
My experience (at least) was that the urge became less noticeable over time (although certainly not at first). That’s all I meant (more passive than ‘conditioning’ makes it sound, although that reminds me – exercise, and hard work, help as well). Boredom would be the worst thing for it.
 
In other words, the longer you go without, the more you get used to going without. That’s what I thought you meant. It’s a simple idea and an effective one, I’m sure, though hard to keep in mind at first. Persistence is the key.
 
Last edited:
I used to struggle with this a lot because I wouldn’t always climax during sex with my husband. Now I make sure that we are specifically having sex when engaging in anything related to sex.

I think my situation might be easier because I have a partner to directly talk to about intercourse, but a trusted spiritual director can also point you in the right direction.

Also, when I had trouble with chastity as a teenager, I would imagined the crucifix and that helped me get into a deeper level of contrition.

Temptation is always present, but I definitely agree with the person who said just chill and try not to let it run your mind. Then pray and repent & remember that the goal is to experience love from sex with who you marry not with yourself. 🙂 You got this!
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top