My father’s father died young, and Catholic, as was my grandmother. His stepfather hated any religion until he was older, and his own children of the second marriage were older. However, he felt no problem with sending his stepchildren and children to the Sunday School dujour to get them out of the house. His eldest stepdaughter did, and marched them all to Mass until she married at 16.
My mother started life as an Episcopalian. Her father was Catholic, “got religion” and had the whole thing redone when my mother was I think was in 7th or 8th grade. Even back then, she obviously had to cooperate with the whole thing.
So, the two very young people met, got married in a civil ceremony, never thought they would have kids- and then she became pregnant with me.
This started the battle of the baptism. It went on until I was five. They had their marriage convalidated, and the 4 they had at the time were baptized, same evening.
The things my mother did correctly: We all went to Catholic school as much as possible, which for me was 8 straight years, Kindergarten through Seventh Grade. Other siblings managed to make it through Catholic high school with only a year stop-off in public school. She also insisted we go to Mass every Sunday and holy day, even if she did not accompany us, as her “mood” toward the Church varied, sometimes for years.
The things she did wrong: Allow my father to make fun of the Church and our reception of major sacraments to us, and tell us simply to “offer it up”. Not force my father to attend said reception of sacraments (He did not attend his elder five children’s First Communions or Confirmations). Come up with their own rules on the nature and content of mortal sin, which labeled whatever they said was a mortal sin, a mortal sin. Inconsistent parenting on both their parts, but most importantly on the matter of religion.
The outcome: Out of seven children, one is a Missouri-Synod Lutheran, widowed, divorced, and now married again, grown children, sent them to Lutheran elementary school and public high school. One is a sort of buddhist, sort of Catholic. Three are lapsed, one with one divorce, one with 3 divorces, one who won’t get married but has long-term relationships with women. Those with children sent their children to Catholic elementary school and public high school. Two are practicing Catholics. One sent his kids to Catholic elementary school and public high school. One the parents do not consider Catholic because she obtained a decree of nullity and married somebody else in the Church without their permission, even though she was 32. She sent her kids to Catholic school or home educated, coming in contact with public school as little as possible. All grandchildren baptized as infants. All Catholic grandchildren received the sacraments “on time”, the Lutheran ones also “on time” for the Lutheran timetable.
Out of the grandchildren: One of the four in the 24-30 age bracket is a practicing Catholic. One is sort of Lutheran. In the 18-24 age group, 2 out of five are practicing Catholics. One is what she calls “non-denominational”. Two are lapsed. The other four are under 18.
Dad is back in the Church in his old age, although both he and my mother still think they have the last say on who is in mortal sin.
You tell me who influenced whom, who rebelled, and what the ding-dong went on. It’s anybody’s guess.
. Yes, you were blessed, and I bet you’ll ‘repay’ this particular blessing by being the same kind of parent to your kids!
NO joke.:bigyikes:
Fasting, going to confession, going to Liturgies, was perceived as ‘extreme,’ but they never stopped me, and even somewhat encouraged me (except for the fasting - my father was concerned about my health 
).
