How do I ask my parents to take me to mass?

[Mrs_Sally]

Ok so I asked my parents a few days ago, but they didn’t reply (I don’t know if they were just distracted or if they were just ignoring me )

Yesterday, I slipped the question into the conversation again but somehow the subject got changed, and my parents never said “yes” or “no”. They weren’t mad or anything, but they started talking about how surprising it was that people still went to church and were so committed and how in the future, religion would probably be gone because of scientific knowledge.

So I don’t know what to do.

Keep asking. If the conversation gets turned, bring it back up. “Yeah, lots of people still go to church. I understand St. Stylites (local parish) has 2 thousand registered families. There is a Mass at 10:30, can you drop me off for that? I’d be ready to be picked up at noon.”

Be sure you know the Mass schedule so if they say no because it’s too early you can say well there’s another at 12:30, or whatever.

Continue to check into public transit, bike paths, friends or neighbors who attend regularly. If you can get yourself a ride, they will very likely not object. I’m sure you are allowed to go with friends for an hour or so on the weekend. Yes, you need to keep up with your schoolwork, but Mass attendance shouldn’t interfere with that.

 

[alwayslooking]

I really have nothing to add to the conversation other than keep asking, and you now have a lot of people praying for you.

I’m praying for you. Keep it up, and keep the faith.

 

[fred_conty]

I’m a Catholic 16 year old but I don’t go to church regularly because my parents aren’t religious. I’ve been wanting to go to church for a long time- for as long as I could remember, actually. I’ve stayed with a friend for a few weeks this summer and their family attends mass every week, and now that I’m back Sundays feel even emptier than they used to. I feel like God is really telling me to go!
But I don’t know how to bring this up to my parents!
The obvious answer to my question would be “just ask them”, but somehow I just can’t- it is more complicated than that.

In my family religion just is not talked about. Actually I feel weird writing this post. My parents have expressed several times their disapproval of the Catholic church and their atheistic views. They have made fun of Christianity several times and once they said that it was all brainwashing. However aren’t exactly anti Catholic. They “kind of” raised me Catholic to keep my grandparents happy- my parents never actually believed it themselves. We go to mass when my grandparents visit, or when my parents feel like it on holidays. I received first communion and attend Catholic high school. I used to go to church camp.

I’m not very close to my parents. I’m usually a quiet,shy person, even at home. I tend to keep a lot of things to myself, I don’t even know if my parents know that I actually believe in God. I argue quite a bit with my parents- (this is why I tend to be quiet at home. The most ordinary conversations turn into arguments!) My parents will wonder why such a troublemaking child who never openly expressed interest in religion would want to go to church.
I’m afraid my parents will misunderstand me and we’ll start an argument over church. Which would be horrible, they will just hate religion more and be more against me going to church.

It’s not that I need a ride to mass. I could walk to church in 20 minutes. But I need to talk to my parents and get them to accept the idea of me going to church weekly- I can’t just disappear for about 2 hours every Sunday!

What do I do?

Say a prayer to the Holy Spirit first so He will lead you.
Every try bribing them? This for that.
How about trading chores for church time? Mowing the lawn, washing the car. Raking leaves. Putting out trash.
Drop some names of kids they wouldn’t care for. Say I need help to stay away and the church gives me that.
How about, " so and so’s mom and dad go to chruch." Or Johnny’s mom and dad let him go to church.
If you know of kids who go to church, use their names and say,“I want to hang out with them a little bit.”
I’m sure if you give it a little thought you could come up with some very convincing ideas.
We are all for you and don’t give up.

 

[Julia_Mae]

Another idea, after you get them to give you a definite answer, and as long as they don’t actually object, is to call the Parish and see if there is a youth group and call the director of that. That person will know if there is someone in your neighborhood you can ride with.

As someone who wanted to go to church as a teen and had no family support, I’ll just encourage you as the others have to not give up. If your parents are like mine, they have told themselves you are going through a “phase” and if they misdirect you long enough, you’ll forget about it. Good luck.

 

[Mintaka]

Re: bus or subway

I think we can assume the original poster lives either in the suburbs or the country. My suburban church was an hour’s bike ride away (ten minutes or less in a car), and the other parish’s church was closer but down a dangerous no-shoulder road. Going out a third way, there was a parish two hours’ bike ride away. Let’s not even think walking.

At any rate, most suburban parents today don’t allow one to go out biking alone until one has reached an advanced age. Going out at a “weird hour” like Sunday morning would generally be a no-no.

OTOH… and I’m not really recommending this, just saying it might work, if you do have a church within a few hour’s walking or biking distance… you could always just declare that you’re going out biking or walking or whatever, at about 6:30 AM on Sunday (or however long you estimate it will take you to get there), and be quite open about your intention to go to church when asked your destination. Your parents may let you go; they may freak and demand to drive you; they may just freak. Either way, wear comfy shoes and change shoes when you get there.

I don’t advise jogging to church, because you’ll be pretty sweaty by the time you get there. But if the church has bathrooms (and they will) you can change there for church if need be.

Don’t sneak off without your parents’ knowledge, btw. Be perfectly open and docile and sweet and good – and persistent in asking, too.

Re: friend to ride with

Good idea if you can find a Catholic your age and get your parents to agree. Many will find it hard to resist the siren call of socializing.