How do I confess this?

[Digit1059]

This whole thing is just so embarassing…

I’ve been struggling with an “addiction” to masturbation. I was recently baptized, and despite my best efforts of distracting myself/praying/reading/etc I slipped… I regret it extraordinarily and I have no clue how to go to confession tomorrow, it’s so embarrassing. I can talk about it on the internet, but, in person it’s so much harder.

Confession is hard on its own for me (I have anti-social anxiety disorder along with being an overall private person), but something like this, I have no clue.

Can I have any advice? I’m so very nervous about this, and I’m extraordinarily uncomfortable.

Thank’s.

 

[Kithrus]

This whole thing is just so embarassing…

I’ve been struggling with an “addiction” to masturbation. I was recently baptized, and despite my best efforts of distracting myself/praying/reading/etc I slipped… I regret it extraordinarily and I have no clue how to go to confession tomorrow, it’s so embarrassing. I can talk about it on the internet, but, in person it’s so much harder.

Confession is hard on its own for me (I have anti-social anxiety disorder along with being an overall private person), but something like this, I have no clue.

Can I have any advice? I’m so very nervous about this, and I’m extraordinarily uncomfortable.

Thank’s.

well because Priest have a vow of chasity try to spare priest the details of my own failing in this topic be it thoughts or deeds. being general enough to get the point across is cool as long as the priest doesn’t have to ask to clarify.

when I slip up like you I normally say

“I have allowed my mind to wonder on impure thoughts and gave into actions involving myself.”

now that I consider hiding from these forums for all time I hope that helps.

 

[grasscutter]

Hi! Please don’t feel awkward about confessing this. It is most certainly something that Priests hear a lot. Maybe it would be helpful to you if you phrased your sin in terms of “acts of impurity”. That way, the Priest would know what you mean and it would allow you to retain some personal dignity. I wish you well and I hope that your embarrassment about this sin won’t keep you from experiencing God’s grace through The Sacrament of Reconciliation.

 

[Digit1059]

If I say “Acts of Impurity” will they just leave it at that? Thank’s so mcuh.

 

[grasscutter]

If I say “Acts of Impurity” will they just leave it at that? Thank’s so mcuh.

Pretty much, although you may be prompted to mention the amount of times since your last confession.

By the way, I relate to your social anxiety issues, so I’m rooting for you!

 

[TheRealJuliane]

If I say “Acts of Impurity” will they just leave it at that? Thank’s so mcuh.

He probably will know what you mean.



But maybe if your confessional has the screen as an option, it would be easier. I have done only one face to face confession in my life and I hated it. I go to a church that has the traditional confessional booths. I never see the priest. And more important, he never sees me!

It will be OK.

 

[ChibiViolet]

“Acts of impurity” isn’t quite specific enough. You could say that you touched yourself impurely and the amount of times you did so, or an estimation of how many times (if you lost track) and that would be adequate.

You could write it down if it’s too hard to say. Most priests will accept written sin lists and I know this from experiance.

 

[grasscutter]

He probably will know what you mean.



But maybe if your confessional has the screen as an option, it would be easier. I have done only one face to face confession in my life and I hated it. I go to a church that has the traditional confessional booths. I never see the priest. And more important, he never sees me!

It will be OK.

I agree! I vastly prefer a traditional confession booth.

 

[grasscutter]

“Acts of impurity” isn’t quite specific enough. You could say that you touched yourself impurely and the amount of times you did so, or an estimation of how many times (if you lost track) and that would be adequate.

You could write it down if it’s too hard to say. Most priests will accept written sin lists and I know this from experiance.

Good advice about written sin lists. I didn’t know this and am very happy to have the information.

That said, I can’t imagine a Priest who wouldn’t automatically know what “acts of impurity” means because if it was pre or extramarital relations, people would probably use different wording. "Acts of impurity (like impure thoughts) is generally understood to be solitary sins. Especially when it’s a young person in the Confessional(!).

 

[ValPal]

I always do face-to-face confessions, and have confessed this particular sin. Yes, it is embarrassing, but I’m sure the priest has heard far worse confessions. Just confess the sin, resolve not to do it again, do your penance, and move on.

 

[Gertabelle]

I used to go face to face to the same priest every week or two. About the fifth time I went, and confessed the same embarassing sins, Father began to give me some advice and then stopped. Suddenly he said, “Have we talked about this before?”

In other words, this priest I saw several times a week at mass and my son’s school, this priest who comforted me when I suffered a hand injury similar to one he’d had in his adolescence, a priest my friends and I had shared coffee, donuts and conversations with – he did not remember me or my sins as I sat there in the confessional!

Or pride will convince us that the priest actually cares about our sins, or that we’re the only person who ever confessed our particular sins.

Go behind the screen if you have that option. Be straight forward - no excuses, just the facts. Go and get it over with.

God bless you.

Gertie

 

[The_Scott]

You could also simply say “I have masturbated ___ amount of times.” He’ll accept that. If that’s too blunt for you, perhaps say something along the lines of “I’ve pleasured myself ___ amount of times.”

 

[Bowljr300]

Another way of saying it:

Father, I have committed sexual self-abuse ____ times since my last confession.

He will know precisely what you mean.

 

[triumphguy]

This whole thing is just so embarassing…

I’ve been struggling with an “addiction” to masturbation. I was recently baptized, and despite my best efforts of distracting myself/praying/reading/etc I slipped… I regret it extraordinarily and I have no clue how to go to confession tomorrow, it’s so embarrassing. I can talk about it on the internet, but, in person it’s so much harder.

Confession is hard on its own for me (I have anti-social anxiety disorder along with being an overall private person), but something like this, I have no clue.

Can I have any advice? I’m so very nervous about this, and I’m extraordinarily uncomfortable.

Thank’s.

Keep it simple and to the point:

The more you think about it, and the more your mind complicates the whole thing the tougher it is going to be to get to confession.

The priest will just be impressed by your honesty.

Just say masturbated, or if you can’t say that to the priest: the sin of Onan, or self stimulation, or solitary acts of impurity, or like others have said “pleasured” myself.

The sooner you go to confession and the less you worry about it the easier it will be.

And don’t forget, Christ chose to die alone and in agony on the cross, naked and humiliated so that you could be forgiven. Our own embarrassment and humiliation at confessing this sin is nothing in comparison that love.

 

[ChibiViolet]

The following was originally posted by Bookcat:

For mortal sins (sexual sins are grave matter for such) Number and kind and circumstance that changes the sin (like it was your brother you murdered…).

Like:

Fornication 2x
Adultery 3x
Lustful thoughts 3x
etc

Here this will help:

From the Senior Apologist at Catholic Answers:

jimmyakin.typepad.com/defenso…ic_confes.html

 

[mab23]

This whole thing is just so embarassing…

I’ve been struggling with an “addiction” to masturbation. I was recently baptized, and despite my best efforts of distracting myself/praying/reading/etc I slipped… I regret it extraordinarily and I have no clue how to go to confession tomorrow, it’s so embarrassing. I can talk about it on the internet, but, in person it’s so much harder.

Confession is hard on its own for me (I have anti-social anxiety disorder along with being an overall private person), but something like this, I have no clue.

Can I have any advice? I’m so very nervous about this, and I’m extraordinarily uncomfortable.

Thank’s.

find a catholic church that does anonymous confessions (booth or something similar) that’s what I do when I need to confess sins that I just can’t do in front of priest who can see me - and just say a list of sins and throw that one in the middle and say in non-nonchalantly!

Im pretty sure 99.9% of male Catholics have masturbated one time or another - so im sure its pretty common in the confession booth

 

[arkwright]

This whole thing is just so embarassing…

.

I was told that this is the sin priests hear confessed more than any others .

Just say "I have been impure with myself once/twice/three times/ four times etc. "

 

[Jacob18]

This whole thing is just so embarassing…

I’ve been struggling with an “addiction” to masturbation. I was recently baptized, and despite my best efforts of distracting myself/praying/reading/etc I slipped… I regret it extraordinarily and I have no clue how to go to confession tomorrow, it’s so embarrassing. I can talk about it on the internet, but, in person it’s so much harder.

Confession is hard on its own for me (I have anti-social anxiety disorder along with being an overall private person), but something like this, I have no clue.

Can I have any advice? I’m so very nervous about this, and I’m extraordinarily uncomfortable.

Thank’s.

Advice to stop:

If you do not feed something, it will go away. Such is the case with new stray animals coming to your house, and even vices. Do not think of impure acts, do not seek after porn on the internet, and avoid occasions of sin. Including, avoid googling stuff without safe-search and do not try to justify sin, God never wants you to sin.

That being said, even consenting to impure sexual thoughts the Catholic church says is mortal sin. Correct me if I am wrong.

I have prayed for you, brother. Keep the faith.