How do I get my Catholic friends to stop wearing bikinis?

[ddarko]

Of course this is quite unkind and I’m not actually recommending it. But the quickest way to get a woman to stop wearing a bikini is to tell her she looks fat in it.

This will certainly do it!

But if its not true that she looks fat, you would have had to lie, which means you might have done a bad thing. They also might just breakaway the friendship and keep dressing the way they do anyway.

I suggest praying for them and getting ready to explain why they should dress modestly when that inevitable day comes when they will ask why you don’t dress in the same way they do.

Whatever you do, do not join them

God Bless

 

[Whitacre_Girl]

Maybe becaue he wondered why you would want to get your friends to stop wearing a bikini. WHY is wearing a bikini as a girl bad?

Because some men can’t control themselves, so they seek to control the women around them,

So women gotta take another one for the team I guess.

(for the record I do not now nor will I ever wear a bikini, but I do not oppose any woman’s right to do so. They are far more comfortable to swim in, but I can’t pull it off.)

 

[Lui]

Because some men can’t control themselves, so they seek to control the women around them,

Exactly. In other words it’s the problem of those men and not of the girls wearing bikinis. I’ve been doing intensive swim sport for about 18 years, often being in the pool 5 days a week. I’ve seen girls in normal bathing suits and in bikinis a trillion times. I never get aroused by it either way because I concentrate on my training. That shows that it’s NOT the bikini or the fact that girls show more than they “should” that arouses one but rather the fact if a guy let’s himself be aroused.
As an example. If I watch this video from my view as a swimmer I just pay attention to the women’s technique: youtube.com/watch?v=QlHqN9OkCUA&feature=related

If someone watches it with the feeling of lust, it is that person’s own perception.

 

[Bookcat]

Exactly. In other words it’s the problem of those men and not of the girls wearing bikinis. I’ve been doing intensive swim sport for about 18 years, often being in the pool 5 days a week. I’ve seen girls in normal bathing suits and in bikinis a trillion times. I never get aroused by it either way because I concentrate on my training. That shows that it’s NOT the bikini or the fact that girls show more than they “should” that arouses one but rather the fact if a guy let’s himself be aroused.

A persons “desensitization” is just that. Not the norm by which to judge the objective question of modest or immodest attire. Habituation (to use the technical term) can result from such constant exposure. The fact that you have been doing this for 18 years and been in the pool 5 days a week can account for such habituation in your case.

Such is a well established occurrence.

Your conclusion here is based on your habituation. It is taking a very unique experience and seeking to draw norms from it. Which is not really a valid approach from the perspective of moral theology .

 

[Bookcat]

Modesty in the Catechism of the Catholic Church:

2521 Purity requires modesty, an integral part of temperance. Modesty protects the intimate center of the person. It means refusing to unveil what should remain hidden. It is ordered to chastity to whose sensitivity it bears witness. It guides how one looks at others and behaves toward them in conformity with the dignity of persons and their solidarity.

2522 Modesty protects the mystery of persons and their love. It encourages patience and moderation in loving relationships; it requires that the conditions for the definitive giving and commitment of man and woman to one another be fulfilled. Modesty is decency. It inspires one’s choice of clothing. It keeps silence or reserve where there is evident risk of unhealthy curiosity. It is discreet.

2523 There is a modesty of the feelings as well as of the body. It protests, for example, against the voyeuristic explorations of the human body in certain advertisements, or against the solicitations of certain media that go too far in the exhibition of intimate things. Modesty inspires a way of life which makes it possible to resist the allurements of fashion and the pressures of prevailing ideologies.

2524 The forms taken by modesty vary from one culture to another. Everywhere, however, modesty exists as an intuition of the spiritual dignity proper to man. It is born with the awakening consciousness of being a subject. Teaching modesty to children and adolescents means awakening in them respect for the human person.

2525 Christian purity requires a purification of the social climate. It requires of the communications media that their presentations show concern for respect and restraint. Purity of heart brings freedom from widespread eroticism and avoids entertainment inclined to voyeurism and illusion.

2526 So called moral permissiveness rests on an erroneous conception of human freedom; the necessary precondition for the development of true freedom is to let oneself be educated in the moral law. Those in charge of education can reasonably be expected to give young people instruction respectful of the truth, the qualities of the heart, and the moral and spiritual dignity of man.

2527 "The Good News of Christ continually renews the life and culture of fallen man; it combats and removes the error and evil which flow from the ever-present attraction of sin. It never ceases to purify and elevate the morality of peoples. It takes the spiritual qualities and endowments of every age and nation, and with supernatural riches it causes them to blossom, as it were, from within; it fortifies, completes, and restores them in Christ."315

vatican.va/archive/ENG0015/__P8R.HTM

 

[Lui]

Your conclusion here is based on your habituation. It is taking a very unique experience and seeking to draw norms from it. Which is not a valid approach from the moral theology perspective.

If ALL girls would wear whole body suits like in the 19th century, I bet some guys would get aroused by the parts of skin they see, like thighs and feet because it would be based on THEIR habituation. They would be used to women being mostly covered that a small bit of skin could already arouse them. Where do you want to draw the line what is morally “ok” for a Catholic girl to wear?

 

[Bookcat]

If ALL girls would wear whole body suits like in the 19th century, I bet some guys would get aroused by the parts of skin they see, like thighs and feet because it would be based on THEIR habituation.

You misunderstand the word habituation.

 

[Bookcat]

If ALL girls would wear whole body suits like in the 19th century, I bet some guys would get aroused by the parts of skin they see, like thighs and feet because it would be based on THEIR habituation. They would be used to women being mostly covered that a small bit of skin could already arouse them. Where do you want to draw the line what is morally “ok” for a Catholic girl to wear?

You misunderstand the word habituation.

As to what to where…well something modest.

The virtues of prudence and temperance (including modesty) need to judge…

See CCC et al.