How do I handle this?

[shainski]

Wow, I would be very excited if i found out something like a long lost missing sibling. I would have a lot of questions, and I would want to know of things. But then, i would start to realize that we may not get along. But I would want to try.

Then, I thought - what if my wife, all of a sudden, found out of a long lost sibling. She would be excited. I would be excited for her. But maybe I would start feeling a little left out.

I would like to think i would encourage her all the way. But I could see where I might resent it a bit.

I would only caution to go slowly. There are things you are likely to like about your brother, and things you don’t (and the same for him about you). You can’t overcome a lifetime of missed memories overnight. You may not get along ultimately - but maybe you will.

And it may very well help you to be able to talk about your mother to someone who is excited to hear all about her.

good luck

 

[madelynn]

Linna, I’ve read the responses here, and I just want to say that I’m glad you spoke to your husband, and decided to communicate with your brother. I hope this is a valuable experience for all of you.