How do I help a friend with mental illness?

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I want to help a friend with mental illness/ spiritual issues whom I just established contact with after 5 years. I used to be fairly good friends with him and he was really into the faith, especially Marian spirituality. He actually introduced me to Marian spirituality and the Marian visions of the 20th century, which helped me out a great deal over the past 15 years.

Well, college took its toll on him as well a host of personal problems, including drugs. He drifted away from the church as many of us have done and became a Budhist of sorts. He also got deep into drugs after this point. I know that spiritual problems and excessive guilt led him down this dead end path. I tried to talk with him about his problems back then, but I never felt like I got through to him and I didn’t have all of my spiritual stuff together, so I was incomplete in my counseling. A few years later, he had some sort of mental breakdown and has been on a roller coaster ride of ups and downs ever since. He was doing better lately as he was taking care of his father who was dying. Now his father has died and I fear his mental troubles may overtake him again.

I want to help him beyond just praying for him, which I have been doing. I want to be the friend that I should have been in the past. Does anyone have any suggestions or any experience with mental illness? I am just looking for any advice out there. Thanks in advance.
 
You are a wonderful friend, a true child of Mary and I commend you on wanting to be of more support and help for your friend.

I have a question - how has he dealt with his drug addiction? Did he - or is he now - in recovery? Did he choose to deal with the addiction through a spiritually based recovery program?

If he did, you might have a wonderful way to begin conversations with him regarding his need to turn to a power greater than himself for help during difficult times! If he is open to listening to people who have gone through - and survived! - similar situations, you might have him listen to Father Corapi’s story. You can get his CD for free at CatholicCity.com.

You might also ask him if he would like to attend Mass with you or if he would like to do other, simple, fun things with you - go to dinner, have a cup of coffee, come over to watch a movie…sometimes, just being made to feel “a part of” again can be so helpful to those trying to fight their way back to the real world.

God bless you for your efforts. You are in my prayers.
 
Thanks for the kind reply, I truly appreciate it. I believe the drugs are a thing of the past. He is now dealing with the after affects of his former drug use. I don’t believe he went through a spiritual addiction program. I don’t know what his faith life is like now, but I think he is still might be a budhist of some sort.

I know he needs God’s forgiveness and I know that confession would free him from the guilt he feels and provide him the grace he needs. I first have to get him to believe in Jesus Christ and his church and also to turn to Our Lady for help. Fr. Carapi is a great idea to get this process started, his biography is unbelievable. I can also use my own faith journey as a testament to help him. By the grace of God, with the help of Mary, I am here writting to you and not in the state that my friend is in or worse.

Another aspect to Catholicism and Christianity that I wish I would have been exposed to at a much younger age is the concept of of carrying your cross. By this I mean, that suffering is a part of life sometimes and some souls experience tremendous suffering, but it does not have to destroy us. As Catholics, we can join our suffering with the body of christ and help others and our own salvation. I don’t believe my friend is aware of Catholic suffering theology and it might work for him like it worked for me. I know that Budhists have a different view of suffering than Christians do and hopefully he is open to a different point of view.

I also like the idea of inlcuding him in normal fun activities. That should be not as difficult as the spiritual dimmension and will surely help open up the door. I now understand finally that the Lord only wants us to try, he doesn’t expect us to succeed, at least right away. Look at the crucifixtion, to the naked eye Jesus did not look very successful at that point did he? Please pray for me, especially to Our Lady of Fatima, as I prepare to help him and have a Merry Christmas.
 
You will be in my prayers…I hope he will listen to you…start slow. Be a good and solid friend to him and when he sees how you live your faith, you will attract him back to the Truth.

Of that I have no doubt.
 
I like the start slow idea. Slow and steady wins the race, I always say. Well, it is not true for everything, but in this case it’s true. I’ve learned that the hard way. I will let you know how things go in the new year. Have a very Merry Christmas.
 
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