How do i know what my calling is?

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anthony6

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i though i was getting a calling to become a priest for about 2-3 years now but i am not sure. i was thinking about it for a while and i think i could and would enjoy having a life of a priest. now i have been dateing this girl for a while now and i believe i will marry her in the future and i can honestly say i love her.

now i am confused. i know God calls us to be priests, deacons, nunes the whole lot. i also know that he calls us to be wifes, husbands, mothers, and fathers. so what is God calling me to become? does he want me to leave my girlfriend and become a priest or later in life become a husband and a possible father? what path does he want me to take? i really don’t want to leave my girlfiend but i want to follow God’s plan for me. what do i do? thank you for the help.
 
anthony6 said:
i though i was getting a calling to become a priest for about 2-3 years now but i am not sure. i was thinking about it for a while and i think i could and would enjoy having a life of a priest. now i have been dating this girl for a while now and i believe i will marry her in the future and i can honestly say i love her.

now i am confused. i know God calls us to be priests, deacons, nuns the whole lot. i also know that he calls us to be wives, husbands, mothers, and fathers. so what is God calling me to become? does he want me to leave my girlfriend and become a priest or later in life become a husband and a possible father? what path does he want me to take? i really don’t want to leave my girlfriend but i want to follow God’s plan for me. what do i do? thank you for the help.
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Since no one on here really knows your heart, I don’t think you’ll receive a clear cut answer. Do you have a spiritual director? It sounds like you don’t, but you need one. They are an invaluable resource because they help you in times like this where you are confused and searching for answers. It’s hard for someone to give you a reply without knowing your life situation and why you feel called to become a priest or father.

The best method to start with is a life of prayer. This is the best way to seriously discern God’s will for you. Even if you don’t have a spiritual director (it took me 7 months to find mine), the Holy Spirit will guide you where He wants you. I had to really listen to the promptings of the Holy Spirit before I realized I was truly called to Carmel. It’s not easy. It takes a lot of silence and patience on your part, but if you are willing to do it, I believe you will find a lot about yourself.

It really sounds like you are at a crossroads. Have you been to any discernment events? How has your discernment to the priesthood been? Positive? Negative? What made you start dating? Does your girlfriend know about your discernment? What was her reaction to it? These are all questions you need to ask yourself and probably what your spiritual director needs to put before you. It’s somewhat hard to discern the priesthood with a girlfriend.

If you could see yourself getting married to her, why not consider the permanent diaconate? Of course, your girlfriend, if and when she becomes your wife, will have to approve of you becoming one, so it’s important that she is supportive of your vocation. Also, you will have to wait until you turn 35 years old.

Also, I want to give you a fresh perspective on the priesthood:

Becoming a priest means becoming the spiritual father to thousands of people! If your soul craves fatherhood, this might be a legitimate path for you to consider. I once heard a Passionist Priest say that he called monasteries: “Homes for Unwed Fathers.” Priests need to possess many father-like qualities.

If it helps, read these FAQs from Vocation.com:

vocation.com/content-f11.htm
vocation.com/content-fdtd.htm

I pray you receive clarity soon, and that you desire to listen to the will of God in your life above your wants and desires. He knows what will make you truly happy more than you do. 🙂
 
thank you for your reply it was very helpful. no i have’nt told any one about this. my sister became a nune about 5 months ago so i have been thinking hard about this. thank you again for all your help.

God bless
 
anthony6 said:
thank you for your reply it was very helpful. no i have’nt told any one about this. my sister became a nune about 5 months ago so i have been thinking hard about this. thank you again for all your help.

God bless
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You’re welcome. 👍 Your sister is a nun? That would be really wonderful if you discerned that you were called to serve as a priest or deacon. Just think! 🙂
 
A suggestion for you. If you are not sure of your vocation and you already have a girlfriend, you may want to take a break from her so that you can truly seek God’s will without attachments. If you really want what God wants then you need to be free to choose what he wants. If you go to Him letting go of your desires offering them up to Him and asking Him give you His desires you open yourself up to His will and if He wants you to marry your girlfriend she’ll wait for you. If she is not willing to let you go to be sure she is what God wants for you then she really doesn’t love you in a way that cares for your well being. We will only be truly happy if we are doing God’s will and whatever vocation He has chosen for us is what we need to be truly happy. If He is calling you to religious life, you need to be free to accept the call. Not easy, but definitely worth it! In God’s will is our peace.🙂
 
If you think it’s tough for a young person finding out what their calling is, it’s worse for the old ones!

At the risk of sounding like a broken record in these threads, I’m 54 years old. And I haven’t the faintest idea of what I am to do with my life. I’m not working right now-with nothing on the horizon. I really hate the work world-I never felt a part of it.

I wanted to serve God in the religious life, but that never materialized. Tried Third Orders, and they didn’t work out.

I was never keen on marriage, either.

So it looks like I will NEVER KNOW…I have only death to look forward to…this so-called ‘life’ is nothing but an exile.

I’m a nothing, and a nobody, just because I’m of a certain age…😦 :mad: 🤷
 
barb_finnegan said:
If you think it’s tough for a young person finding out what their calling is, it’s worse for the old ones!

At the risk of sounding like a broken record in these threads, I’m 54 years old. And I haven’t the faintest idea of what I am to do with my life. I’m not working right now-with nothing on the horizon. I really hate the work world-I never felt a part of it.

I wanted to serve God in the religious life, but that never materialized. Tried Third Orders, and they didn’t work out.

I was never keen on marriage, either.

So it looks like I will NEVER KNOW…I have only death to look forward to…this so-called ‘life’ is nothing but an exile.

I’m a nothing, and a nobody, just because I’m of a certain age…😦 :mad: 🤷
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You are NOT a nothing and age is only a number, it will only affect you if you let it. You have so much to give, just follow your heart:)
 
StarMaiden said:
You are NOT a nothing and age is only a number, it will only affect you if you let it. You have so much to give, just follow your heart:)
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But I don’t know what my ‘heart’ is leading me…🤷

I’m pretty clueless…with a bit of spiritual ‘tone-deafness’ thrown in for good measure. :confused:
 
barb_finnegan said:
But I don’t know what my ‘heart’ is leading me…🤷

I’m pretty clueless…with a bit of spiritual ‘tone-deafness’ thrown in for good measure. :confused:
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Just listen and you will hear:) You are not clueless you are just searching and that is good.
 
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