How do I tell my mom I'm converting?

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mdrummer5

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It’s been an amazing four months (roughly) since my decision to convert. At one time I was worried that as I read more I might find the belief that Jesus was the messiah harder to believe… I’m very happy to say that it couldn’t be more from the truth and as every interview in “The Case For Christ” ends it has only made my faith stronger.

Now my only worry is how to tell my mom… I’ve posted about this before but sadly it’s gotten much worse. We don’t talk often and lately when we do talk she shows exactly the kind of ignorance that kept me away from Christianity for the longest time… not in the sense that she persuaded me not to but that Christians would try to tell me what I should believe… now she’s doing the same.

Last night when we were talking she asked me what I was doing for Passover. I’ve not practiced Judaism for roughly 17 years and neither has she so I have no clue where that came from. I explained that I didn’t have any plans for it at which point she suggested that I should have my girlfriend (who is Catholic) learn how to prepare a seder. I really had no idea what to say seeing as how it was completely out of left field so in my stunned silence she immediately jumps to “you know that if you two get married and have kids they’re going to be Jewish” :eek:

Most people have one of two questions/issues/objections with Christianity. Either they don’t believe Jesus existed or they believe he was “just a man”. My mom falls into the latter. I’ve been reading as much as I can to be more educated on how to provide evidence of Jesus’ divinity but I’m not sure I know enough and I’m not sure how to even broach the subject with her.

Any advice on approaching the subject or explaining it better than I will likely be able to would be appreciated.
 
This is a bit off topic, but please bear with me…

I prepare a seder meal on Holy Thursday. We have lamb, unleavened bread, bitter herbs. We read from Exodus and we talk about how those events prefigured the coming and subsequent sacrifice of Jesus. And we eat desert which is a treat when you have been fasting for Lent. The seder marks the end of Lent and the beginning of the Easter Triduum, which is the high point of the Church calendar and my favorite part of the year. So, your girlfriend could learn to cook a seder and use it to celebrate the Last Supper of Christ.

As for how to tell your mom, well, charity goes a long way. Perhaps you use the seder to introduce the topic. The lambs entered the temple area on the 10th day of Nisan correlates to Jesus entering into Jerusalem on Palm Sunday, etc. She may be very unhappy, but being firm but gentle in talking to her will leave the door open for further discussion. I am so happy to hear that you are coming home. Good luck!
 
mdrummer5 said:
It’s been an amazing four months (roughly) since my decision to convert. At one time I was worried that as I read more I might find the belief that Jesus was the messiah harder to believe… I’m very happy to say that it couldn’t be more from the truth and as every interview in “The Case For Christ” ends it has only made my faith stronger.

Now my only worry is how to tell my mom… I’ve posted about this before but sadly it’s gotten much worse. We don’t talk often and lately when we do talk she shows exactly the kind of ignorance that kept me away from Christianity for the longest time… not in the sense that she persuaded me not to but that Christians would try to tell me what I should believe… now she’s doing the same.

Last night when we were talking she asked me what I was doing for Passover. I’ve not practiced Judaism for roughly 17 years and neither has she so I have no clue where that came from. I explained that I didn’t have any plans for it at which point she suggested that I should have my girlfriend (who is Catholic) learn how to prepare a seder. I really had no idea what to say seeing as how it was completely out of left field so in my stunned silence she immediately jumps to “you know that if you two get married and have kids they’re going to be Jewish” :eek:

Most people have one of two questions/issues/objections with Christianity. Either they don’t believe Jesus existed or they believe he was “just a man”. My mom falls into the latter. I’ve been reading as much as I can to be more educated on how to provide evidence of Jesus’ divinity but I’m not sure I know enough and I’m not sure how to even broach the subject with her.

Any advice on approaching the subject or explaining it better than I will likely be able to would be appreciated.
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get yourself a catechism so that you can answer any /all your mothers questions and arguements…be honest with your mother, she may take it worse if you lie to her and she discovers the lie…remember at the end of the day you are an adult, you dont have to ask permission to be catholic, you can tell your family but you dont need their permission, they cant stop you,…st edith stein was jewish and she faced the same dilemma as you, she wanted to become catholic and she told her mother lol…and yes st edith stein did become catholic, she is a lovely saint, she reminds me a bit of anne frank, (they both died in the holocaust)
 
I wish I knew a way to offer advice. I myself am having a similar problem with some family members (Protestant faith). I am at a loss in how to handle it except to continue to live in my faith. That above all will see me through. All I know to do is to offer you my prayers and empathy.
 
Thank you all for your responses.

To clarify I’m not wanting to debate on the topic of Catholicism with her so much as explain how Catholicism is the next logical step after Judaism. I had considered Salvation is from the Jews, does that or any other book offer a good explanation for that? Such as comparing the prophesies from the OT and showing where Jesus fulfilled them?
 
I have read a few of the “Surprised By Truth” books, and I believe that both of these books had at least one instance of a convert coming from Judaism…I don’t know if you have access to these books, perhaps reading them for yourself would give you any ideas. And maybe even your mother would be interested in these books (Maybe you could just mark the specific chapters?).

That may or may not be a great idea for you. I sympathise in my own way. I too am becoming Catholic, and I have not told my mother (and my sister who lives with her). Two years ago when my journey started they knew, and I got a little bit of flack of what I was doing to my family (husband and child)…I became LDS (mormon) 12 years ago, and the entire time I was preparing for that, I tried to keep my mother informed…the day I was walking out of the door for baptism my mom stopped me at the door to say “You are ripping my heart out”…however, I still went, and my mother and I fell into a pattern where we just don’t talk about religion. She knows I do whatever I want, especially since I’m an adult.

In some ways that moment prepared me for the process I’m going through now…except this time it’s my spouse that feels hurt, and in this case I may actually lose him, unlike my mother who will always be my mother. Unfortunately, because of 12 years ago, and my initial statement about Catholocism 2 years ago, I have not shared what’s going on. They will know, eventually…That’s probably not helpful for you either. I wouldn’t recommend necessarily doing the same thing, but I wanted to share my experience. The good news is she will always be your mother. As difficult as it may be. I can only hope when you are able to talk to her, that sooner rather than later she can respect your decision and love you because she is your mother, and that is really her job. 🙂

Good luck! 🙂
 
zipperc98 said:
I have read a few of the “Surprised By Truth” books, and I believe that both of these books had at least one instance of a convert coming from Judaism…I don’t know if you have access to these books, perhaps reading them for yourself would give you any ideas. And maybe even your mother would be interested in these books (Maybe you could just mark the specific chapters?).

That may or may not be a great idea for you. I sympathise in my own way. I too am becoming Catholic, and I have not told my mother (and my sister who lives with her). Two years ago when my journey started they knew, and I got a little bit of flack of what I was doing to my family (husband and child)…I became LDS (mormon) 12 years ago, and the entire time I was preparing for that, I tried to keep my mother informed…the day I was walking out of the door for baptism my mom stopped me at the door to say “You are ripping my heart out”…however, I still went, and my mother and I fell into a pattern where we just don’t talk about religion. She knows I do whatever I want, especially since I’m an adult.

In some ways that moment prepared me for the process I’m going through now…except this time it’s my spouse that feels hurt, and in this case I may actually lose him, unlike my mother who will always be my mother. Unfortunately, because of 12 years ago, and my initial statement about Catholocism 2 years ago, I have not shared what’s going on. They will know, eventually…That’s probably not helpful for you either. I wouldn’t recommend necessarily doing the same thing, but I wanted to share my experience. The good news is she will always be your mother. As difficult as it may be. I can only hope when you are able to talk to her, that sooner rather than later she can respect your decision and love you because she is your mother, and that is really her job. 🙂

Good luck! 🙂
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I’m sorry for the trouble it’s causing you and your husband, but thank you for sharing and good luck! 👍
 
Hi there. I just wanted to jump into the discussion quickly. I am also converting from Judaism. I’ll be baptized this Saturday at Easter vigil and I couldn’t be more excited. I also had issues with my family accepting my decision. If you want to send me a PM, I’d be happy to share my experiences.
 
I have experienced this same type of difficulty with my family from a different perspective. I was born and raised Southern Baptist and my Father especially has expressed disdain for my desire to be recieved into to the Church. You have my prayers. Please keep us updated, I’m sure your story will encourage others.
 
Hi,
That is a tough one.

I can tell you what I do when I know in advance that I am going to be in a difficult personal encounter. Before it happens, I say to the Holy Spirit, “I don’t know what to say dear Holy Spirit. Would you please give me some thoughts when this is going on because I will make a mess of it without your help. You know them. Put words and thoughts in me so this will go well”. I don’t know of time yet that the Holy Spirit has let me down.

Just ask him to help make this go well and guide you. " I have full confidence in You and know You will do this because You can do anything, especially when charity is needed."
 
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