How do you figure out what your personal prayer life should look like?

[Bluebright]

Everyone’s prayer life is different. Ask God to guide you. I agree with a great deal of what the other’s say. Start small and let it grow. I’d say a mix of mental prayer and vocal. Don’t leave out the mental prayer though, but you can ease into that. Another thing is try develop a habit of recollection, which simply means turn your thoughts to God …a lot. Well start with as often as you can. So if you are shopping think, so God what should I buy for dinner tonight? or if you are waiting for the train, ask God for a safe journey home and thank him when you have one etc. The more you think of and get used to including him in your day. the better. Start the minute you wake up, why not say good morning and thank him for your day. There you go, prayer life of the day started . Vocal prayer is incorporated in the mass and lots of devotions like the rosary, chaplet of divine mercy etc. A warning here, dont take on too ,many too soon. Let God guide you. Slow and steady does it.
One thing I dont agree with the others on is not praying if you you dont feel like it… I’d say this is a rocky one. Unless you are severely in the dark night of the soul, don’t stop praying if you dont feel like it. Keep praying even if you dont feel like it unless acedia will set in, otherwise known as sloth. Slow and steady is the way forward, you are right… you would go weeks without praying if you only did it when you felt like it. But as always, just my opinion. If you really absolutely dont feel like you can pray then beg God to help you and just resign yourself to his will and tell him how much you love him. Even then, get others to pray for you and consult your spiritual adviser. Most likely, when you dont feel like it, it’s just a distraction and once you push past it, you’ll get there. God bless

 

[Tis_Bearself]

This is quite wonderful. It’s good to know that even today there are such inspiring monks coming out of abbeys in UK. Gives me much hope.

Your mention of Cardinal Hume reminds me of the time when I was not practicing my Catholicism and went over to London to take a major bar exam. During a lunch break in the exam, I wandered out and found by accident the Basil Hume Quiet Garden, which just happened to be behind the building where the exam was taking place. I did not have a clue who Basil Hume was, figured he was some Anglican probably, but sat in the garden anyway, ate a carryout sandwich and prayed to pass the exam and for relief from my anxiety. It seemed an odd place for a garden and I was in it all alone but it was very nice and private as the shrubbery is set up to give you some privacy. I was happy to learn later that Hume was actually a Catholic. I did pass the exam too (barely, but since it’s a pass/ fail that was just fine).

 

[Rob2]

Your mention of Cardinal Hume reminds me of the time when I was not practicing my Catholicism and went over to London to take a major bar exam. During a lunch break in the exam, I wandered out and found by accident the Basil Hume Quiet Garden, .

That’s a lovely anecdote .

And “quiet” is just the word to associate with Cardinal Hume .

I met him once in Lourdes . We were both on our way to our separate hotels for dinner . It was a simple chat . He was asking me about the hotel I was staying in .

In memoriam Basil Hume - The Quiet Garden Movement

 

[MariaChristi]

Dear Rob,

Thanks so much for your reply to me. Again I hope others on the thread will read it and watch the video. I read the Obituary and also listened to Fr. Petit in the brief video you included in your reply, and was blessed by both. I can see why you wanted to give credit to this Benedictine priest who was so very helpful to you, and I am sure Fr. Petit helped many others as well.

Many persons, like myself, can identify with some of the things he preached in that video!

How very important it is – for clergy and people to listen to the Word of God and open their hearts to the Work of God’s Holy Spirit sent to bring us into all Truth – but especially clergy ordained to preach the Gospel!

May Perpetual Light shine upon Fr. Ian Petit OSB. May his soul and the souls of all the Faithful Departed rest in peace. Amen.

 

[Marie16]

Thank you to everyone for the advice! I have been thinking over it all the last couple of days and am grateful for so many people willing to offer suggestions.

So the key principle is find what you can do most days, and then do it, even if you do it badly.

I agree consistency is the most important and can show our decision to be faithful regardless of results, but if you continue to pray badly is there a point this becomes a sign you are doing something wrong and change is necessary?

Also remember to talk with God throughout the day like he is your friend or family member. Doesn’t have to be long talks, just a thank you or a sentence here and there.

This used to be one of my favorite things to do shortly after I began praying. Thank you for the reminder! Glad to hear other people do such because I always felt slightly crazy for always trying to bring God into my mind all day.

Some days all my prayer is “Jesus I trust in you.” And I will repeat that prayer at different moments of the day. If I did that daily with tru love for Jesus in my heart, that would be more powerful than saying a rosary daily out of routine.

It’s beautiful that you recognize that. It’s so hard for me to understand God places value in such small acts. This has been my go to prayer the last couple of years when I gave up on much else and my phone lock screen for several months now to remind myself to keep trying.

Ultimately ask ‘Is this leading me to a deeper relationship with the Lord?’ - if it is keep at it; if it’s becoming a block maybe look at something different.

How do you know it’s leading you to a deeper relationship?

You might like to try making short visits to Jesus in Tabernacle at your local Catholic Church.

I am very lucky to have access to a local chapel 24/7 to visit Jesus! I started going again last week so we will see what comes of it.

 

[Marie16]

God instructs us to say , " Speak Lord . Your servant is listening " not " Listen Lord . Your servant is speaking " .

How do I cooperate with the Holy Spirit in prayer ? By using as few words and rules as possible .

Weak being that I am , I need a few rules to discipline myself in prayer .

Weak being that I am , I need to use as few words as possible or I may end up thinking that my words are more important than the words of the Word in my prayer .

Thank you for this reminder! Yes, you are right. We do not spend nearly enough time listening to God. I struggle with knowing exactly what that means though. I don’t currently use a lot, if any words, when I set aside prayer time. Sometimes I enjoy just being able to sit there and spend time with God. Sometimes I feel as if I’m being avoidant by doing this and that doesn’t seem good. I can’t say I ever hear Him saying much.

What a beautiful excerpt on prayer!

And just keep reminding yourself that God is the same regardless of your particular mood. We have a strong tendency to project our personal feelings onto the world and allowing it to color things a certain way. God loves to hear you just as much when you’re tired or apathetic as when you’re zealous.

I sure do hope so

I have been slowly introducing journaling back into my routine this last week. Small amounts at a time so I do not become overwhelmed. May I ask, why do you say prayer is good first thing in the morning? I have a tendency to set time aside later in the day and/or right before bed as my norm but this can be changed.

Also helps to find your spirituality type. I’ve discovered that in my heart, I’m a Jesuit

I very much enjoy reading and will look into the books you recommended. I also developed an interest in the Jesuits after attending a silent retreat about a year and a half ago. I do have to say the retreat left me with mixed feelings, but after the fact and to this day I still enjoy learning about Ignition spirituality. Admittedly, I know nothing about any others.

One thing I dont agree with the others on is not praying if you you dont feel like it… I’d say this is a rocky one. Unless you are severely in the dark night of the soul, don’t stop praying if you dont feel like it. Keep praying even if you dont feel like it unless acedia will set in, otherwise known as sloth. Slow and steady is the way forward, you are right… you would go weeks without praying if you only did it when you felt like it. But as always, just my opinion. If you really absolutely dont feel like you can pray then beg God to help you and just resign yourself to his will and tell him how much you love him.

I agree. I’ve travelled that path before and it led me pretty directly out of the church. I am trying to avoid that again.

 

[therese1998]

Don’t pray because you feel you should. Pray because you want to.

I understand the sentiment, but I think prayer, like many religious observances, requires discipline. It does for me, anyway. I have to incorporate a bit of “have to” or else it can be easy to drop it or become very informal with it.
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Also remember to talk with God throughout the day like he is your friend or family member.

Very important

So, my two cents:
Prayer is lifting your heart and mind to God. It can be scheduled or spontaneous. Your prayer may look like mine or it may not. It is personal and it is between you and God. I tend to be more private about prayer; others find inspiration in praying with others.

Every morning, I have a prayer I pray for those in my life who have passed on. I name them each and I also say a prayer for the Souls in Purgatory and the St. Michael prayer. I also read the Gospel and listen to Morning Glory (EWTN) for a few minutes as I go to work. At bedtime, I say an Act of Contrition and listen to a podcast from EWTN. In between, I “talk” to God as if he were sitting beside me. It’s generally a quick sentence or two, but His presence is more constantly there than I have to consciously go somewhere or do something to “find” Him or to “start” a prayer. Hard to explain, but like I said…it’s how it’s developed. There are other ways to pray to God, as well (if you follow the definition of "lifting your heart and mind to God). Listening to Christian/Catholic music, reading Christian/Catholic literature, speaking of Him to others, visiting Him in the tabernacle, etc. There’s literally tons of ways to interact with him. I often say a quick prayer before I have sessions with my students, also.

Ask Him to help you with it, to guide you. Don’t worry if it doesn’t look like this “holy” person’s prayer or that “inspired” person’s prayer life. It’s between you and Him and it will be yours together.

Hope this helps Good luck!

 

[edward_george1]

Don’t pray because you feel you should. Pray because you want to.

Then a lot of people would rarely pray. The point of discipline, in prayer or in anything else, is to help shape our wills so that we will want to, and to keep us on track if we don’t want to. It isn’t either/or. It’s both/and. Pray because you should, because it’s good for you, and in time your will is strengthened toward habitually praying. Read what Lewis says in Mere Christianity about the Our Father.

 

[edward_george1]

I agree consistency is the most important and can show our decision to be faithful regardless of results, but if you continue to pray badly is there a point this becomes a sign you are doing something wrong and change is necessary?

Certainly. A very wise priest friend once told me that there is no stagnation in the spiritual life, there is growth, and there is decay. You’re either moving forward or you’re moving backwards. If you feel stuck or like you’re constantly praying badly, it might be a good time to reevaluate and take stock of what you might need to work on. Think of it like exercise. If you train and train and train, and you can’t seem to get your mile time down, maybe you need to adjust your training regimen. You might not be training enough. You might also be training too much. And a competent coach can help you adjust. Just the same, a priest or spiritual director or even just a friend who can help keep you accountable can help you see what the issue is and adjust accordingly.

 

[AngelusDomini]

How do you know it’s leading you to a deeper relationship?

It’s not something that necessarily becomes apparent overnight. It takes time to discern such things. A starting point may be to ask if the devotion leads you to deeper contemplation of Christ, makes you more conscious of acting in a Christ-like manner, etc. That’s not to say a particular devotion should just be disregarded. To give an example, some people love the Divine Mercy devotion. I may only recite it a few times a year as I find it draws me more into the mystery of the Passion during Passiontide.