How do you identify and remove evil from your life?

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Just tell him you know of this great martial arts training going on down in the Florida Keys - will be happy to handle it for you. Kidding - but my hubby won’t be. Know seriously - make a scene next time - nothing wrong with it. I would also start a running group at your Parish. Too much scandal involved here.
 
whatevergirl said:
…He asked me to sincerely ask this guy to meet my husband for a beer, and to watch a hockey game…I said, ‘‘Honey, I do not want to hang out with this guy.’’ He said it would be just them…he said, ‘‘I can’t change what I did, but this guy won’t stop with you…maybe I can help him? He said…it’s hard to be mad at someone, when I did the same thing as him to another man’s wife.’’ I didn’t know what to say…I had no idea that that still haunted my husband? 😦 You know we can confess our sins, but there is an indelible mark that sin leaves behind…(I mean we’re talking this occured what…30+ years ago??)

*I have a deep newfound respect for my husband after that chat. I mean really! I was like speechless…I said, ok. I will ask him. I said suppose he says no? He said, you can convince him…tell him I am not interested in hurting him. 😃 He laughed…**. *
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I thought your husband asked about hockey so the next move could be to* play* hockey with him. And if the guy got a little ruffed up in a hockey game:blackeye:, well, that’s hockey.
 
Late here…but I read the pages with interest. Whatevergirl - I have always been impressed with your posts. They are always insightful and tender-hearted.

I know what you mean about wanting your DH to be more demonstrative in his emotions. But it is a medical psychological fact that males are more action-driven and females more emotion-driven. Men by nature want only facts and then take action upon the facts. Women by nature have an emotional need to talk things out and reach decisions best by discussion. This is one of the reasons men and women are so “Venus and Mars”.

But by reading this entire thread, I read that your DH has inner emotions he is now sharing with you - a huge step for him. See how God has used this situation to break your DH’s silence about something in his past that has apparently haunted him? How good is God to use you and this situation to effect such change!

I would hve been reluctant to have shared the situation with my own DH, too. I would have been afraid DH would think I had done something to have encouraged the man. And my DH and I have been married 38 years (on June10)! Then DH would have invited the man over for a little :
:slapfight:

And then there is always this:
 
gardenswithkids said:
I thought your husband asked about hockey so the next move could be to* play* hockey with him. And if the guy got a little ruffed up in a hockey game:blackeye:, well, that’s hockey.
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I guess that could be plan B. lol*
 
Razz(name removed by moderator) said:
Late here…but I read the pages with interest. Whatevergirl - I have always been impressed with your posts. They are always insightful and tender-hearted.

I know what you mean about wanting your DH to be more demonstrative in his emotions. But it is a medical psychological fact that males are more action-driven and females more emotion-driven. Men by nature want only facts and then take action upon the facts. Women by nature have an emotional need to talk things out and reach decisions best by discussion. This is one of the reasons men and women are so “Venus and Mars”.

But by reading this entire thread, I read that your DH has inner emotions he is now sharing with you - a huge step for him. See how God has used this situation to break your DH’s silence about something in his past that has apparently haunted him? How good is God to use you and this situation to effect such change!

I would hve been reluctant to have shared the situation with my own DH, too. I would have been afraid DH would think I had done something to have encouraged the man. And my DH and I have been married 38 years (on June10)! Then DH would have invited the man over for a little :
:slapfight:

And then there is always this:
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Yes, I guess a better way of saying it is that he doesn’t show his emotions much. But, he HAS them. I need to remember that. We joke about his emotions…lack of emotions. My daughter said one day…’‘daddy, you could be one of those guards in england, who have no expression on their faces, and wear those big fuzzy hats.’’ 😃 He laughed…he said, I’ll keep it in mind if my job at disney doesn’t work out. Really…sometimes, it can be frustrating…I am the polar opposite…LET’S TALK ABOUT OUR FEELINGS, SHALL WE? HAHA But, he isn’t. He sees a problem, let’s solve it. Men and women…so different. Maybe that’s why we need each other so. Thank you for your post.
 
*Kindness and joan…thank you for your advice…Kindness, those passages you posted, thank you. I forget sometimes about Christ’s stern warnings…we shouldn’t be surprised at all. We should expect the best, but prepare as if the worst were coming our way, really. *
 
Be careful, Whatevergirl, there are sometimes some issues in which people can’t be pleased no matter what. Too controlling, too nonchalant… is there a golden middle, or is that simply the uncomfortability of the situation itself projecting on people? I’ve come across this problem in women a number of times, I suppose this a very feminine reaction, the way in which a woman is made up. This is another reason why you can and should go to your husband for a hug and a bit more talking. And don’t analyse, just ask. You’re married, he’s Catholic, he has the guts and the reason you’d have to pick out of six other men, he can help you with that one too. He can’t explain certain things or reassure you about some others if you don’t ask him. This may be a bit counterintuitive because we are inclined to think of what worth is it if we have to ask for it? But we aren’t mathematical equations, things won’t go to the same place when following the same rules, we don’t ever have full data, we have to give people clues, chances and opportunities. If anyone is worth of that, your husband is.

About scenes, once upon a time a girl I had a crush on (which she didn’t know about) asked me to handle a guy who was being insistent with his comments. I made a point to handle that without violence and with as little show as possible. I told him, sure, I agreed she had nice shoes and all, but he had a bit too much to drink and maybe he should have a walk outside. No combat for show and no show for those who don’t fight.

Praying for you, your husband and that guy who might be helped. Such things happen. Let’s recall for a while the first saint who crossed the gates of heaven.
 
whatevergirl said:
Doesn’t really matter what it is, but just wondering…how do you deal with evil trying to take a foothold in your life? How do you identify something or someone trying to bring evil into your life? Would you be able to recognize evil if it were coming your way? I thought I was good at telling the difference between good and evil, but lately…I don’t know.

I am typically a person who gives the benefit of the doubt to people. I like to believe people are inherently good, albeit misguided or lost if they show signs of bad behavior. I am in a quasi-situation right now, which isn’t getting better, and it’s causing me angst. I am strong in my faith, but lately, I feel like I’m making excuses for people who exhibit bad behavior. Maybe because the bad behavior isn’t constant. What do you do to avoid evil, or get it away from you? Finally…Is it judgemental to think this way? (that a person’s behavior can negatively impact your own life) Thanks for your thoughts, in advance.
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Would you be able to recognize evil if it were coming your way?%between%
I don’t know if anyone has mentioned this already…but reading scripture daily(esp. the Gospels & New Testament letters) helps when you want to identify evil (& it’ll help in avoiding it as well)

Also by recieving the sacraments frequently &praying daily you’ll recieve much grace which will help in identifying & avoiding evil

Perhaps if you talked with your husband about these things he might also be able to help?

Your brother in Christ,
Zachary
 
Just a thought WG - and I am playing catch up - Just got back from a Confirmation retreat with the teens - but your dh wanting to meet up and watch hockey could be a good thing. I was listening to Steve Agrisano speak this weekend. We all have those moments to speak of God or tuck away our Faith. This could be a moment for your husband to say this man - hey, I used to be just lke you…but… and now life is like… and look what I got…God is good. But really in this situation a man is the best to do it. Looking at it again I think my earlier post was harsh while evil was there God sometimes allows evil to happen to good people for reason we cannot understand. Maybe in this case He is offering this man a chane at conversion by introducing him to a man that can understand through an object of desire.
 
joan, you were totally not harsh…I love what you posted here, too…thanks. I agree. I know everyone, when giving advice, comes from a place of their own exsperiences…as long as no one name calls me, I’m fine with any and all advice, even harsh at times…I will be seeing the guy this week, he should be back from his business trip – he was out last week, so wish me luck. Many prayers. Thank you!
 
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