How do you stay positive when I see so much negativity everywhere?

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AlwaysChatholic

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Everyday life is bringing me down. Like in the news media I am seeing and hearing bad news. The cancel culture, the riots and so on. In my own life I should be happy now but I am not realy. My family and I are moving into a nicer and safer neighborhood with my In-laws. My father in law has been resisting this move ever since we decided to move. Now we are in the process of moving and he is still not a happy camper. He thinks the reason the previous owners sold their house was because there is something wrong with it. My In-laws didn’t even want to pack stuff from their old house to move into the nice house. So everything is getting to me. Its like my family and I are trying so hard to make my in laws happy so we can all live a good life. But my father in law is doom and gloom and I am tired of riots and destruction of our beautiful country. So I have to live with an angry elderly and watch the angry mob on t.v also. All of these are bringing me down. How do I stay happy and positive? I pray every day.
 
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I know what you mean. It’s like there is no where to run if society collapses. If I didn’t have like minded conservatives to talk to it would be unbearable. Ultimately we have faith in God. God is the consolation.
 
Give praise and thanks to God. (That’s a reminder I need today too)
Thank you Lord that you are here in the midst of all our troubles and worries! I praise and bless you mighty God in King! I can’t wait to see your intercession in my life and in the world!

Walk along with the feasts of the church. We have just celebrated the feast of the Transfiguration! The Lord revealing his glory, as much as his disciples could behold! Remember Moses came down from the mountain with the 10 commandments, his face radiant as the sun. We too shall see the Lord in glory and be transformed as well! All these other things today are passing away.

We have all the saints cheering us on! It is our time to shine and give glory to God.
 
I stay positive by staying busy. I have a small house but there is always some drawer or folder or cabinet that could be cleaned out or organized.
I’ve also started some new hobbies I can do right at home. Right now we’re composting for the garden next spring.
Even with nowhere to go there is still a lot to do and being productive gives me a sense of accomplishment that boosts my spirits and then I’m also tired at night so I can fall asleep instead of letting the worrying get to me and keep me awake.
 
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Stay away from the news and social media, as much as you are able. If you’re feeling overwhelmed it’s really important to take a step back. Perhaps you could also (gently) ask your father in law to agree to disagree (if that’s possible). Perhaps it would be better for your spouse to do that.

I really think the best thing you can do is get outdoors, away from any media. Just going for a walk everyday may help boost your spirits.
 
Stay away completely from media. No TV. No talk radio. No online forums or news. That will help in a huge way. You won’t miss anything, believe me. Next, make sure you have a daily, active prayer life, with meditation on the promises of Jesus. He has told us all about how to respond to this world and how to keep focused on the joys to come. We know as Catholics how to accept suffering and offer it to God for the salvation of souls. Jesus has said that ALL authority is His–meditate on that. Finally, realize that depressed or “gloom and doom” people are wounded in some way. Show love to such family members in the same way as if they were physically hurt. Be kind, listen, be gentle. Be a strong and quiet support for them. Pray for them.
 
This is sort of like everyday advice, because you have some real good Catholic advice.

People’s attitudes really get to me a lot. I feel like I must have done something wrong. I also just kind of feel their upsetness inside of me.

But what I am having to learn is that people are just sometimes that way and also that just because they are upset doesn’t mean I did something wrong.

So I am learning that just because my teenage kid is mad at me, for example, doesn’t mean that I am doing the wrong thing by making him come home at a certain time.

I have to just allow all that uncomfortable feeling to just be there until it goes away, which it will. Before I always thought I had to do something to like solve the problem, but now I am trying to not do that. If they want to be miserable, it is not my problem.

It sounds like you and your family are doing a good thing by moving your in-laws to a better place with you!

But if they are like my older parents, they are probably unhappy because of a million problems of getting old. They don’t want to admit things like they need help or that they are in a place in their lives which they didn’t really imagine.

Like, retirement is cool, but your kids making you move is not what you expect when you think about retirement.

So, I hope this helps. Also, I had a priest tell me to say a Hail Mary for people who I was mad at, that also helps me.
 
I, too, feel dragged down by what seems to be the never-ending negativity around me.

Note that I said “what seems to be”.

I had to train myself to look for the good in everything and in every day. There is always something good (even if it’s a tongue-in-cheek kind of good) and I learned if I focused more on that instead of the bad, it would certainly help my mind frame. In time, it became easier to see the good first and focus on that instead of finding myself continually dwelling on the negative. If nothing else, recalling that God is good and focusing on what He does for us (I’m alive! I can breathe! I can see! I can smell!) helps me find the balance I need.
 
You are under stress with your in-laws and moving situation. Pray and try to do something nice and relaxing for yourself daily, even if it’s just taking a nap or a walk, to cope.

Stop watching the news. You are already stressed. The news stresses you more. Turn it off. Tune out.

I have been in the situation of dealing with a cranky elderly parent daily, it is very stressful even when there wasn’t a move involved. It is tough. Be as nice to yourself as you can be. This too shall pass. Hang in there.
 
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I used to listen to NPR all day long when I was home, as I am now home for Covid. Boy has that station changed since the 2016 election, for the worse IMO. Anyway, I made the very conscious decision about three months ago to never turn it on again. I switched to our local classical music station and just love it! No ads, very calming, and a huge education in classical music just by the osmosis of listening. I am not well trained in classical music, despite years of piano lessons, and it has always been a goal. Now, I’m achieving it. Listening to Mozart as I type this!
 
Wonderful advice already given, and as someone who has struggled at times to remain positive during the pandemic, I will second what others have said:

Turn.

Off.

The.

News.

and:

Turn.

Off.

Political.

Radio.

I’ve done both for the past few months and it has helped my outlook a great deal.
 
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My kids and I went to visit my in laws this morning at their old house since its walking distance from our house. Grandpa already got mad at my kids and asked why they were there and they could get into trouble. So we had to turn around and come back. So my kids are dreading living with them already and we will be moved in together somewhat tomorrow already. Exept for my husband who will be staying at the old house fixing our house and their house to get ready to sell. I know it’s going to be difficult living with them. And I am praying. We are trying to do a good deed by taking care of them but in the end all we get is being yelled at. I forgive them but I am also scared and sad.
 
AlwaysChatholic said:
We are trying to do a good deed by taking care of them but in the end all we get is being yelled at. I forgive them but I am also scared and sad.
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Been there done that. I know if my mom hadn’t been unwell and not totally “herself” she wouldn’t have said those things to me. Perhaps Grandpa is in the same condition. I will pray for you and your family.
 
I don’t agree with turning off the news.

Watch your LOCAL news. It helps you to feel connected to your community instead of isolated and alone.

Usually the local news has at least some positive stories, along with upcoming weather (important to know), and often there are opportunities for volunteering or stories about people who could use a prayer, or just funny stories about dogs or cats or silly things that people are doing at their houses during the pandemic–all of this lightens up my day and makes me laugh and feel like I am still a part of a community.

And when the local news does feature sad stories (accidents, shootings, death of a beloved citizen of your town, a local business closing forever), you can identify with their pain, and it really does help to know that other people are going through hard times, too–you’re not alone.

I do agree that listening to the talk shows and the national news is really a downer. When my husband and I were younger, we attended a workshop in our (Protestant) church that featured a pastor who was trying to get people to watch TV with awareness. One of the things he taught us to do was talk back to the ridiculous and highly-slanted (against God and country) stories on television by calling out, “WHO ARE YOU KIDDING?!” It definitely helps!
 
My one tip is don’t watch it on tv.

Literally.

Turn off the news. Only pay attention to what’s going on physically around you in your own neighborhood, family, local community.

The toxic negativity in the news media right now is just too much for anyone’s mental health, in my opinion.

Just turn it off. Nothing will happen except the world will keep spinning… but you’ll be less distressed by unnecessarily hearing about bad or contentious things happening far away that you can’t do anything about anyway.

(I haven’t watched the news in a long time, and I’m so much more content than those family members of mine who are still plugged in. I still know generally what’s going on in the world — it’s remarkable how little actually ‘happens’, considering how frantically the media talks about it. Very little actually changes from month to month, and on that rare occasion when it does? One sentence or one simple fact-based article on the topic is all you need to see, and then tune back out of the chatter again until something actually ‘new’ happens again.

You are very unlikely to miss anything important. If it’s important to you locally, people will start talking about it locally, in person.)
 
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Like the previous answers above, mine is similar. Keep yourself busy with what you like with art, literature or maybe a new language or anything that expands our minds. But above all, prayers are the things that has literally kept me going, and staying positive. I can’t stress the power of prayers enough!!
 
Put you faith and hope in God, not man, not the world. They’ll always disappoint; that’s how it’s supposed to be; that’s what we’re here to learn, in fact.
 
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Turn away from media and focus on God. Keep prepared for the difficult times to come, but dont dwell on them. Focus on gratitude and all your blessings. Pray the Rosary, daily. Stay off social media… even on CAF you can tell by the name of a topic that taking a look will only put you in a bad place.
 
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Again, I have to argue against abandoning the news.

I think it’s important to stay connected to the rest of the world, especially your little part of it, but also to other states and countries. We are all in this life together.

I have to say that I find it disturbing when something happens in the world that is major; e.g., the vote by England to exit the European union–and people where I work (a hospital lab, where most of the employees have Bachelor’s Degrees) had no clue what I was talking about, had no clue that there is a European union, and the only thing they know about England is Princess Kate and what she’s wearing these days.

In other words, sure, stay away from the twitter and facebook versions of the world news, but at least watch the world news portion of your local newcast (or listen to it on the radio or read it online or in a newspaper if your town still publishes a daily newspaper–kinda rare these days, and so are local radio stations).

It’s important for us to know what’s happening with the rest of our fellow human beings! I think it’s more depressing to feel in the dark about what’s happening.

And remember, we are admonished in the Scriptures to pray for our rulers.
 
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