How Do You Work Through Ascesis?

[Arrowood]

I hear you. My brother has cerebral palsy, so we are friends with many families that face similar tragedies. My cousin’s son also had a terminal illness and died just a few months ago. Life can be hard.

That might be a good topic for the course - how to turn that into “Blessed are those who mourn.” It’s an exercise in radical trust.

 

[3DOCTORS]

I hear you. My brother has cerebral palsy, so we are friends with many families that face similar tragedies. My cousin’s son also had a terminal illness and died just a few months ago. Life can be hard.

That might be a good topic for the course - how to turn that into “Blessed are those who mourn.” It’s an exercise in radical trust.

Yes! :aok: I will reflect upon that starting now.

 

[StrikingEagle]

Have returned to church recently with a sincere desire to become as close to God as possible.

Prayer unfortunately is not something I do often but am trying. For example: time with the Blessed Sacrament, occasional daily Mass, or possibly pray a rosary. So far I have not included any commitment for daily prayer.
This deficiency may be due to habit…not searching for God for so long. Possibly laziness…too used to doing “my own thing” and put God behind other activities.

I’m discovering prayer takes discipline. Prayer requires priorities. I’m currently in the process of correcting these defects in myself to improve my prayer life. It’s not easy because as much as I want God at my side, developing even a simple daily prayer life has not occurred.

I’m intentionally avoiding the word “routine.” I don’t want prayer of any kind to be routine. This may be why having a daily prayer life of some type is so hard for me to establish.

By the way, your e-book sounds interesting.

 

[3DOCTORS]

Have returned to church recently with a sincere desire to become as close to God as possible.

Prayer unfortunately is not something I do often but am trying. For example: time with the Blessed Sacrament, occasional daily Mass, or possibly pray a rosary. So far I have not included any commitment for daily prayer.
This deficiency may be due to habit…not searching for God for so long. Possibly laziness…too used to doing “my own thing” and put God behind other activities.

I’m discovering prayer takes discipline. Prayer requires priorities. I’m currently in the process of correcting these defects in myself to improve my prayer life. It’s not easy because as much as I want God at my side, developing even a simple daily prayer life has not occurred.

I’m intentionally avoiding the word “routine.” I don’t want prayer of any kind to be routine. This may be why having a daily prayer life of some type is so hard for me to establish.

By the way, your e-book sounds interesting.

Welcome back to the Church! :grouphug: We thank God for you! :yup:

It’s easy to get into the habit of putting activities before God. It’s probably my biggest spiritual struggle right now. And not for entirely bad reasons - I have had a lot happening in the last few years, major crises that have had to be gotten through, and I’m just trying to work my way through the backlog.

This isn’t a perfect solution by any means, but 2-3 times recently I’ve put on a Rosary CD while I’m working on my sewing. I know it would be better to sit and actually pray along with a rosary in hand and 100% attentiveness (or as close as humanly possible). But it does seem to help me to be prayerful. Yesterday it even helped my emotional state - I have several friends going through crises and have felt sad for them.

The Rosary CD is “Rosary of Healing” by Dana & Fr. Kevin Scallon. When it got to one of the Sorrowful Mysteries and the meditation Fr. Scallon gave was on healing grief, I put down my sewing and just went in and sat down in the living room, because I recalled that today is the year anniversary of the death of one of my friends’ sons from alcoholism. That and all the other things and all my feelings and stresses, give me strong feelings of grief that I needed to open the floodgates, then allow the Lord to console me. :bighanky: I think I’m a little stronger today. I called my friend last night to let her know I remembered about her son, and we talked.

 

[StrikingEagle]

Hi 3Doctors, thanks for your reply.

Nice suggestion about CD. I only have music CDs (mostly classical), no spiritual talking CDs , but relaxing music is conductive to prayer.
Absolutely MUST clean my apartment tomorrow and do laundry. Would be a good
time to crank the tunes and pray while working.
What do you think?
Would be a start on daily prayer…and accomplish quite a bit at the same time.
I don’t think God would mind. You spoke of sloth before…I tend to procrastinate,
especially with housework yuk.

 

[3DOCTORS]

Hi 3Doctors, thanks for your reply.

Nice suggestion about CD. I only have music CDs (mostly classical), no spiritual talking CDs , but relaxing music is conductive to prayer.
Absolutely MUST clean my apartment tomorrow and do laundry. Would be a good
time to crank the tunes and pray while working.
What do you think?
Would be a start on daily prayer…and accomplish quite a bit at the same time.
I don’t think God would mind. You spoke of sloth before…I tend to procrastinate,
especially with housework yuk.

Well - the motto of St. Benedict and the Benedictines is “Ora et Labora” - Work and Pray!

 

[Barzillai]

Everyone has different interests and the life-long journey to dwell with God is so individual, here is the path being followed by my wife and I, in its main elements.

1. From a whisper from God we each and separately before we were married developed a desire to seek God as our whole life. Nothing is more important and nothing occupies more of our hearts and minds.
2. After we were married we tried to keep the world outside our home and souls. We tried to live in silence and peace. My wife created a home of gentle beauty and light.
3. We became Benedictine oblates and began to reorder our lives according to the Rule of Saint Benedict.
4. We made our home even more quiet, such as silencing all phones. We changed our diet into more monastic fare – ie simple, meatless meals. We tried to live simply without the acquisition of things – we gave things aways. We fasted during the main liturgical seasons. My dear wife is more faithful in this than me. In our marriage we sought to be constantly humble and obedient.
5. We watched TV but mostly EWTN and when we watched commercial TV we avoided commercials.
6. We installed chimes in our home that chimed the hours and quarter hours as a constant call to stop and pray.
7. We gradually withdrew from more of the world’s distractions and noise. We became more careful about what we watch on TV. We do not go to movies or follow sports, or news, politics, or any parts of popular culture, music, or books. We don’t listen to the radio in the car.
8. We began continual personal studies of the Bible, the Catechism, John Cassian’s Conferences, the Philokalia, and the books by Saint Teresa of Avila.
9. We spend most of our time in silence.
10. We followed more and more a life of ascetic practices, not as ends in themselves, but only as mortifications to help us work toward purity of heart and the elimination of sin.

 

[Arrowood]

Have returned to church recently with a sincere desire to become as close to God as possible.

Yeah! Welcome home!

Prayer unfortunately is not something I do often but am trying. For example: time with the Blessed Sacrament, occasional daily Mass, or possibly pray a rosary. So far I have not included any commitment for daily prayer.
This deficiency may be due to habit…not searching for God for so long. Possibly laziness…too used to doing “my own thing” and put God behind other activities.

You’re exactly the kind of person I hope to help with my program. So I’m very excited to read about your experience.

I’m discovering prayer takes discipline. Prayer requires priorities. I’m currently in the process of correcting these defects in myself to improve my prayer life. It’s not easy because as much as I want God at my side, developing even a simple daily prayer life has not occurred.

This is a large part of what “ascesis” is all about. I have struggled with this for a very long time and I’m finally figuring it out. Developing the self-discipline for prayer takes perseverance and time. But there are also some strategies that can help.

I’m intentionally avoiding the word “routine.” I don’t want prayer of any kind to be routine. This may be why having a daily prayer life of some type is so hard for me to establish.

I differentiate between “routine” and “ritual.” They’re both habits, but a “ritual” is done with meaning and purpose. Prayer isn’t the only kind of ritual, but turning your prayer into a ritual goes a long way!

By the way, your e-book sounds interesting.

It’s actually an e-course with videos, interactive activities and a social group. I think it’s going to fill a great need! Thank you for your (name removed by moderator)ut. It will definitely help me shape the course.

 

[Arrowood]

It’s easy to get into the habit of putting activities before God. It’s probably my biggest spiritual struggle right now. And not for entirely bad reasons - I have had a lot happening in the last few years, major crises that have had to be gotten through, and I’m just trying to work my way through the backlog.

I can totally relate!

This isn’t a perfect solution by any means, but 2-3 times recently I’ve put on a Rosary CD while I’m working on my sewing. I know it would be better to sit and actually pray along with a rosary in hand and 100% attentiveness (or as close as humanly possible). But it does seem to help me to be prayerful. Yesterday it even helped my emotional state - I have several friends going through crises and have felt sad for them.

I use recorded a recorded version of Liturgy of the Hours and the Rosary. They really do help. The only danger is falling into the trap of thinking that having it on in the background is the same as praying. It’s certainly better than nothing. But at some point prayer needs to be focused time with God. That said, recorded prayers like these can be a great help working through ascesis - training the mind and emotions to take the time for prayer. Great recommendation!

The Rosary CD is “Rosary of Healing” by Dana & Fr. Kevin Scallon. When it got to one of the Sorrowful Mysteries and the meditation Fr. Scallon gave was on healing grief, I put down my sewing and just went in and sat down in the living room, because I recalled that today is the year anniversary of the death of one of my friends’ sons from alcoholism. That and all the other things and all my feelings and stresses, give me strong feelings of grief that I needed to open the floodgates, then allow the Lord to console me. :bighanky: I think I’m a little stronger today. I called my friend last night to let her know I remembered about her son, and we talked.

Beautiful story! Thanks for sharing this!

 

[3DOCTORS]

I can totally relate!

I use recorded a recorded version of Liturgy of the Hours and the Rosary. They really do help. The only danger is falling into the trap of thinking that having it on in the background is the same as praying. It’s certainly better than nothing. But at some point prayer needs to be focused time with God. That said, recorded prayers like these can be a great help working through ascesis - training the mind and emotions to take the time for prayer. Great recommendation!

Beautiful story! Thanks for sharing this!

Good morning! Or whatever time of day it is where you are. I know, having the CD on is a halfway measure - though sometimes I do find myself reciting the prayers and paying at least 3/4 attention! But yes, the goal must be full attention, as much as humanly possible.

This week has been fragmentary and distracting again. The spirit is willing but the flesh remains oh so weak. I’m really grateful for this thread, though. It’s one of the most inspiring I’ve come across for awhile. Let’s keep sharing and uplifting one another! :grouphug:

 

[Arrowood]

It is better than nothing. Listening to recorded prayer can be a way to get into the habit of prayer.

Something must be “in the air” because I had a very distracted week too! Hopefully this coming week will be better.

 

[therese14]

Maybe you should read works of St John of the Cross, particularly Dark Night

 

[Arrowood]

Hey therese14!

If you look at the posts below, you’ll see that my question is searching for real-life examples to help me shape an e-course I’m planning. I’ve read Dark Night as well as the writings of St. Teresa of Avila. I know what they teach about ascesis. But I’m curious about how modern Christians are working through it. I’m looking for practical strategies to share with my students.

 

[3DOCTORS]

I don’t know if this makes me an honorary Benedictine or not but today I was doing a very mindless task and it occurred to me it would be a great time to pray the Rosary. I wasn’t at home so I just prayed it aloud, and then also the Divine Mercy Chaplet and a few other prayers and hymns. It was a nice quiet time with God - felt like it sanctified that bit of time.

 

[Arrowood]

That’s really cool 3DOCTORS! I think St. Benedict would be proud!