How does one forgive without condoning?

[momo4]

Hello, My husband and I are High School Youth Group leaders. Last night our topic was forgiveness. Funny how ministry ministeres to those leading as much as those being ministered to!

Anyway, we have been greatly struggling with the concept of forgiving without appearing to be condoning immoral behavior, in our own family situation.

Case in point: we have four children. Our youngest, who is now 19 and away at college, has been in a relationship with an 18 year old girl for several years. This relatioship has been an on-going issue even way back when they were in their early years of high school. Lots of sexual immorality, drinking, definance, disrespect, etc. She comes from a very liberal divorced family who sees nothing wrong with any of this behavior, although my husband and I completely disagree with it on a moral and legal level.

We are faced with needing to forgive both of these two young adults without sending out the message that we condon their on-going poor choices. Perhaps this is not even between them and us but rather us and God.

Please share some insight on this issue.

Thanks you and God Bless. Momo4

 

[Fr.Vincent_Serpa]

Hi,

You need to be ready to forgive them. But forgiveness does nothing for the person who is not repentant. Have a forgiving heart, but in no way can you support their wayward ways. By all means continue to pray for them.

Fr. Vincent Serpa, O.P.