How long is too long to examine your conscience?

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QuizBowlNerd

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If you haven’t been to confession in a while (and, critically, have not been examining your conscience daily), would it be unreasonable to examine it over a period of days or weeks prior to making your next confession? I understand that this could lead to putting off going, but you presumably want to make sure all your mortal sins (from a period of months and perhaps years) are accounted for. How do you strike a balance?
 
If you really have to dig deep in your distant memory, it might be useful to at least sleep on it. In other words, do a thorough examination of conscience, using one or a few of the guides which are available, then pray, and then sleep for the night. In the morning, reexamine, and you might have some more recollections or insights. That’s the most that I would do.
 
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QuizBowlNerd said:
If you haven’t been to confession in a while (and, critically, have not been examining your conscience daily), would it be unreasonable to examine it over a period of days or weeks prior to making your next confession? I understand that this could lead to putting off going, but you presumably want to make sure all your mortal sins (from a period of months and perhaps years) are accounted for. How do you strike a balance?
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Are you getting help for your scrupulosity? You really need to take this question and all questions like this to your confessor or spiritual director. Coming here to CAF to ask questions like this will only get you answers that enable your scrupulous behavior.
 
I spent weeks when I hadn’t gone for over 15 years. Partly this is because I found some of the things I had to remember very upsetting, so I took breaks. Also, when I started preparing, I knew I was headed toward confession, but I hadn’t actually made up my mind to do it yet or set a date.

No matter how long you take to prepare, you will remember more in the days or weeks following. From subsequent experience, I think this is in part due to the graces of the sacrament itself. So don’t put it off for too long.
 
How in the world would it take days or weeks!? I’d think anything over an hour would be excessive.
 
Horton said:
Are you getting help for your scrupulosity? You really need to take this question and all questions like this to your confessor or spiritual director. Coming here to CAF to ask questions like this will only get you answers that enable your scrupulous behavior.
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I thought it was an appropriate question to post because you still have to do something to prepare for the confession wherein you ask your confessor the question.

I’m not 100% sure I am scrupulous, and in any event, I don’t think CAF has to have an enabling effect. Say I felt like I had to examine my conscience over a period of two weeks before going, but Beryllos’s and (name removed by moderator)'s advice gave me a “reality check,” so I decided to cut that down to one or two days. Wouldn’t that be helping me deal with my scrupulosity rather than enabling it?
 
No, 10 minutes, in Church, before confessing is all that you need.

If you are really wanting to spend days on your Examination, mention it to the priest, he will have some good, practical, advice for you.

When we turn back toward Jesus, he runs out to meet us,
Deacon Christopher
 
QuizBowlNerd said:
I’m not 100% sure I am scrupulous, and in any event, I don’t think CAF has to have an enabling effect. Say I felt like I had to examine my conscience over a period of two weeks before going, but Beryllos’s and (name removed by moderator)’s advice gave me a “reality check,” so I decided to cut that down to one or two days. Wouldn’t that be helping me deal with my scrupulosity rather than enabling it?
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It is enabling it regardless of the answer. When one is scrupulous they will come to CAF (or other internet forum) to ask questions about sin & confession in order to gain support (enabling) for their scrupulous thinking.

What helps with scrupulosity is spiritual help from well educated and trained people, which would be limited to a priest and/or a good spiritual director at the direction of a priest.

And sometimes one goes back and looks at posting history to get an idea about the person, therefore not going around “labeling” anyone. Questions regarding how long it takes to examine one’s conscience, especially from a young person is classic scruples, especially when that person is talking in the time frame of weeks. A young person can’t have that many mortal sins, and while it is beneficial to confess venial sins, those are forgiven during every Mass we attend.
 
I tend to dip in and out prior to reconciliation for the week before. Sometimes, if you’ve lost your temper for example or behaved out of character it’s obviously imprinted on your mind. I make notes on my phone and delete after confession. Most sins are venial.

Getting in a habit of regular confessions (a month to 6 weeks is good) and more regular examination of conscience really helps. I have some great leaflets and books which help me with lists of questions. Praying the Examen at the end of the day is awesome too. Then if anything is really hanging on my conscience I jot it down in “Notes” on my iPhone. But DO DELETE AFTERWARDS! Or if it’s on paper, be careful and blank the sins out and burn or shred afterwards.

This is my own personal practice, please feel free to use or ignore as you see fit. It’s not in canon law or anything! I just thought it may help.
 
LittleWay84 said:
But DO DELETE AFTERWARDS! Or if it’s on paper, be careful and blank the sins out and burn or shred afterwards.
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You’re very emphatic about it, so I’m just wondering - is destroying your list afterwards just a preference (albeit one I think most people have), or is there some requirement about not leaving a record of your sins?
 
Well, I’ve been doing it for so long now I cannot remember but I think I was advised by a priest.

If someone finds your list then your confession would no longer be confidential. I don’t think it invalidates it but reconciliation is between you and God. You don’t want to have other people know your business regarding sins. I’m sure it’s not a requirement but it is advisable.

I also find it so therapeutic to delete my sins from the notes app after reconciliation. It’s very healing and a reminder that the slate has been wiped clean.
 
Also, deleting stops you reconfessing sins you already confessed!
 
I knew someone once who kept their past lists in a notebook. I guess they used them as an aid when examining their conscience for future confessions. Never quite knew how I felt about that.
 
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