How regretful must someone be?

[mark_a]

How regretful must a person be to be forgiven by God? There are some sins that, although I regret them because they hurt God, (and in the long run myself), I don’t feel as remorseful as maybe I should about them.

These sins are usually the type that aren’t especially harmful to other people. Or am I not digging deep enough?

I think I read somewhere that this type of thinking is in itself sinful.

It’s all very confusing.

 

[springbreeze]

mark a:

How regretful must a person be to be forgiven by God? There are some sins that, although I regret them because they hurt God, (and in the long run myself), I don’t feel as remorseful as maybe I should about them.

These sins are usually the type that aren’t especially harmful to other people. Or am I not digging deep enough?

I think I read somewhere that this type of thinking is in itself sinful.

It’s all very confusing.

Dear friend

Do you expect to have the whole journey in faith sorted within a few months?

Do you know that God will gradually kill off the ‘self’ within you?

Do you know God will lead you in tiny baby steps in faith and teach you something daily?

Do you know that God knows your struggles and goes through them with you and every time you confess them graces you with every opportunity to stop that particular sin?

Did you know that the Father’s forgiveness and mercy is waiting there even before you are sorry for a sin, He so wants to forgive and embrace you fully into Himself that He waits saddened, for you to come back to Him?

Do you know that the Father saw the prodigal son coming from far off, in other words friend, did you know that even the desire to even slightly stop a sin and come back to God, He sees it and graces it and aids it, or how else could that son who so grieved his Father have courage to come back?

Do you know that God is strongest in you when you are at your weakest?

Do you know that even if from this day until the day you die you may strive to be perfect you never will be because you are human and a sinner?

Do you know that it is the intent that matters?

We are all not ‘digging deep enough’ no human alive digs deep enough!

Desire Christ Jesus in your intent…you can do no more than desire Him with every fibre of your being

God Bless you and much love and peace to you

Teresa

 

[mark_a]

Thank you for the considerate response.

Do you expect to have the whole journey in faith sorted within a few months?

No. I’m pretty sure it will go on long after I leave this life.

Do you know that the Father saw the prodigal son coming from far off, in other words friend, did you know that even the desire to even slightly stop a sin and come back to God, He sees it and graces it and aids it, or how else could that son who so grieved his Father have courage to come back?

That is very insightful. For some reason, the meaning of that part of the story has never been apparent to me.

Do you know that God is strongest in you when you are at your weakest?

I could use a little more detail on this one.

Do you know that even if from this day until the day you die you may strive to be perfect you never will be because you are human and a sinner?

It’s the lack of remorse I spoke about above that bugs me.

Do you know that it is the intent that matters?/QUOTE]
Although I don’t normally plan out a sin, I know I’m going to sin again, and possibly not even struggle with it.

Desire Christ Jesus in your intent…you can do no more than desire Him with every fibre of your being.

I’m not sure how to do this.

I’ve heard the expression from non-Catholics “accept the Lord as your personal savior” or “accept Jesus into your heart”. I don’t have a clue as to how this is done. I don’t undersatand these expressions.

Thanks again.

 

[Scott_Waddell]

My understanding is that it is not about whipping up as much remorse as you can, but rather that a firm resolve to not commit the sins again is sufficient.

Scott

 

[puzzleannie]

the contrition required for a good confession is ordinary contrition. we strive for perfect contrition, which is sorrow for our sins because they offend God who is all good and all loving, but imperfect contrition–because we fear punishment and suffer from the damage caused by our actions–is enough. That is why we say the Act of Contrition which includes all those sentiments. The statement in this prayer and intention to express contrition is what matters. This prayer is an act of will, not an expression of the depths of our emotion. Feelings are only the lowest level of indication of true contrition. The expression of contrition and resolve to do better are what is called for.

 

[mark_a]

Scott Waddell:

My understanding is that it is not about whipping up as much remorse as you can, but rather that a firm resolve to not commit the sins again is sufficient.

Scott

Thanks.

After reading your response and speaking only for myself, I have come to the conclusion that remorse and the likelyhood repeating the same sin are inversely proportional.

 

[mark_a]

puzzleannie:

That is why we say the Act of Contrition which includes all those sentiments. The statement in this prayer and intention to express contrition is what matters. This prayer is an act of will, not an expression of the depths of our emotion. Feelings are only the lowest level of indication of true contrition. The expression of contrition and resolve to do better are what is called for.

Thank you.

I must admit that I have never really digested any of the Acts of Contrition. I’m usually pretty nervous. One priest to whom I confess to will lead me through an ad lib AoC, tailoring it to my confessed sins.

Otherwise, they are on a laminated card for us to read.

 

[JimG]

Ideally, one ought to be sufficiently regretful for sin that, if you could go back and have a “do over,” you would not commit the sin.

That sounds reasonable enough, but consider this: In the early Church, the sin of renouncing the Faith often occurred because one was unwilling to face death.

So when the Church asked for evidence of repentance, what they were asking was, “if you could do it over, would you go to your death instead?” That’s a pretty serious test of true repentance.

For our own sins, we should try to reach a state of repentance where, if we could go back, we would not do the sin.

I’ve seen some interviews with some supposedly repentant criminals who had committed some atrocious acts, such as murder. Yet their attitude seemed to be, “Well look, I did it and I’m sorry. But I can’t undo it. There’s nothing I can do about it now. I’m sorry I did it, so let’s just all get on with our lives.” To me, that does not seem to be true repentance.

As Annie pointed out, within the Sacrament of Penance, imperfect contrition–sorry because we fear God’s punishment–is sufficient. But we should always strive for perfect contrition–sorry because we offended God who is all goodness.

 

[AlanFromWichita]

mark a:

How regretful must a person be to be forgiven by God?

I don’t think it’s a fill-in-the-blank answer, but a yes/no answer.

Are you honestly regretful? Yes or no.

I can’t see how the “amount” of regretfulness is meaningful to God, as long as you consent to His forgiveness given freely for the act of love which is admitting your mistake and expressing regret. Don’t even worry if it is a “sin” to God, if you think it might be a sin, confess (admit) it and let Him worry about whether it actually is. It is nice if you see a confessor if you are sufficiently remorseful that you don’t communicate indifference to the priest!

Alan

 

[mark_a]

AlanFromWichita:

Are you honestly regretful? Yes or no.

I can’t see how the “amount” of regretfulness is meaningful to God, as long as you consent to His forgiveness given freely for the act of love which is admitting your mistake and expressing regret. Don’t even worry if it is a “sin” to God, if you think it might be a sin, confess (admit) it and let Him worry about whether it actually is. It is nice if you see a confessor if you are sufficiently remorseful that you don’t communicate indifference to the priest!

Alan

Thanks.

As stated above, to me it seems that remorse and my likelyhood of repeating the sin are inversely proportional.

For example, suppose I had ridiculed a disabled person. I now feel so awful about it that I am extremely confident I would never do it again.

On the other hand, suppose I was jealous of my boss because he is younger, smarter, better looking, etc. and I wished, just for an instant, he would be fired.

Wrong yes, but am I as remorseful as I am about ridiculing a disabled person? No way.

 

[mark_a]

JimG:

Ideally, one ought to be sufficiently regretful for sin that, if you could go back and have a “do over,” you would not commit the sin.

My answer would be yes, but I know that I will stumble in the future on the same sin.

That sounds reasonable enough, but consider this: In the early Church, the sin of renouncing the Faith often occurred because one was unwilling to face death.

Wow. We really have it easy.

 

[AlanFromWichita]

mark a:

Thanks.

As stated above, to me it seems that remorse and my likelyhood of repeating the sin are inversely proportional.

For example, suppose I had ridiculed a disabled person. I now feel so awful about it that I am extremely confident I would never do it again.

On the other hand, suppose I was jealous of my boss because he is younger, smarter, better looking, etc. and I wished, just for an instant, he would be fired.

Wrong yes, but am I as remorseful as I am about ridiculing a disabled person? No way.

Yes, I think I see your point, and tend to agree that the more it hurt, the more priority we usually place on avoiding it. I don’t think God needs any particular amount of remorse from us to forgive us, but we may need that remorse for our own spiritual lesson.

Alan