How should I Make Restitution?

[Catholic_Candle]

When I was younger (7-8 years old), I stole a beautiful, baseball sized rock (an agate) from a box in my friend’s family’s living room. Now, almost 9 years later, I found the rock and remembered the horrible thing I had done. I don’t know the family anymore, and I don’t quite remember which family it was. In theory, if I did some deep, DEEP digging, I could try to find the email addresses of a couple families, and contact them. Since it was so long ago (over half my life), I don’t remember names, and I don’t remember anything about them. I could try to talk to my dad and try to get the names, though.

Is this a good idea? How should I make restitution? May I receive communion after confession this, or must I make restitution first? What do I do with the rock? What if the family moved away? What on earth do I do?

 

[Arkansan]

You are not required to damage your reputation to make restitution. If you can’t return it without great difficulty, just donate it to a thrift store. Restitution can be made to the poor or pious causes when making restitution to the original victim is impossible.

From a Google search, it doesn’t look like Agate is particularly expensive, so this was probably not grave matter. Even if it were, it was probably not a subjectively mortal sin, unless you specifically remember being aware that it was gravely sinful when you did it.

Even if it had been a mortal sin, you would only be obligated to mention it at your next confession. You would not be obliged to refrain from receiving communion (assuming that you just remembered it and that you’ve made a good confession at some point int he intervening years). You do not need to actually dispose of the rock before receiving either absolution or communion, provided that you intend to.

 

[Catholic_Candle]

Thank you for the response. I am very grateful.

One question, though: When you say, “You are not required to damage your reputation to make restitution,” is that true in all cases? What if one stole $1,000,000 from another, of if you stole a valuable painting?

 

[porthos11]

Thank you for the response. I am very grateful.

One question, though: When you say, “You are not required to damage your reputation to make restitution,” is that true in all cases? What if one stole $1,000,000 from another, of if you stole a valuable painting?

Then return them secretly.

 

[recentrevert]

If you had stolen something worth that much you would be in danger of going to prison for a long time in addition to a ruined reputation so I doubt it. I stole some things worth about £100 ($160) from someone I didn’t like while I was away from the Church and then sent them a cheque and an apology note after I came back! But I was terribly scrupulous and I still suffer from it now. This person might now have told dozens of people and my own family might even know but thankfully if they do they haven’t mentioned it! So the damage to me is significantly greater than the damage to them.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

If it’s been this many years and they either didn’t miss it or chose not to go looking for it, like call up your parents and say they think maybe you took their rock, then I suggest you just make a donation to charity in memory of their family and forget about it.

 

[Shasta-Rose]

Whatever else you do, I would at least make a good try at finding out who the owner was and then try to return it. If you can’t, you can’t, and then don’t worry about it. But you should probably try to avoid any further references to it, in case in 40 years you get a shot at being nominated for a high government office, and it comes back to haunt you–“He stole a rock when he was seven.” Your childhood peccadillo could have a longer life span than you anticipate.

 

[Arkansan]

I’m sure it doesn’t hold for all cases whatsoever, insofar as it would be possible to construct some scenario where such an obligation exists.

However, I don’t think that simply raising the value of the theft would change the person’s moral obligations. The harm that would come to a person from being known to have stolen a great sum of money is greater than the harm which results from having a large sum of money stolen.

 

[FrDavid96]

The specifics of what to do, especially given the OPs age, really should be discussed with a priest in Confession.

Sure, we can discuss the subject matter in general terms here on a forum. But this thread is a little too personal for my taste. I don’t want to say anything that might cause the OP any trouble (like getting “in trouble” with parents).

 

[Bluebright]

When you mention it in confession, your priest may have some advice. Also I find prayer is a good way to get an answer to these sort of things. God will provide a way to do restitution that is perfect. I agree that you dont have to go to great lengths and it doesnt need to be a hurried thing.