How to control raging hormones?

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ibelongtochrist

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Hello there,

This is my first time posting a new thread, and I am so happy to have found this sight.
Here is my dilemma:

Lately, I have been having raging hormones. I do not start them, but sometimes they just come and I ignore them like I would an impure thought. Now, I listened to a beautiful song from a christian based movie soundtrack a while ago. As I listened to it, I had those impure feelings again. I kept listening to the song to not focus on my feelings but to try and train myself not to feel this way whenever I hear it. I was focusing on the beautiful meaning of the song (I believe its about Heaven). Anyway I stopped listening to it, but felt very guilty. Did I commit mortal sin?

I knew that song would do that to me, but I listened anyway, not to enjoy those feelings, but to focus on the beautiful meaning. I did not want those feelings, but when I hear that song, they come. I have stopped listening to that song because I read that if anything causes to “stir love early”, you must avoid it in the future. My question is, what do I do if while I am listening to holy music (like christian or even gregorian chant) or even watching a good movie or show (that is not immoral) and I start feeling those hormones again? Stop listening to good music and watching good films? My intention is not to welcome them, but I feel guilty because sometimes I feel like I am keeping them by listening to music, even if its christian or worship music.

I am going to confession to clear it up and get it off my conscience, but I still would like some feedback.

Thank you for hearing me out.
 
I’m not sure on the details of what song you are listening to, what shows you watch, or what exact thoughts you are having, but based on what you said, the short answer is this:

If an occassion of sin is avoidable, you have a duty to avoid it. There is no reason that you HAVE to listen to that song. So if it is leading you into sin, or the temptation to sin, stop listening to it. Same goes for the tv shows and movies. If there is no NEED to watch them, and they are a source of temptation- don’t watch them.

Getting to the sacrament of Penance is the right move, and you are wise to be going. Frequent Communion and frequent confession are essential to development of all the virtues, especially purity. Surround yourself with good Catholic friends that encourage you in your faith, and pray often- a daily rosary is a good part of that.

God Bless and Pax.
 
Feelings aren’t moral acts. Your feelings aren’t a bad thing. Your feelings just do not get to run the show.

You might want to read Song of Songs, actually, which is a love poem. It is full of desire, and speaks of God’s desire for a soul and a soul’s desire for God in terms of an erotic passion, but it is also a testimony to the attitude of chastity. It is a poem that presupposes self-control and assumes that all these feelings have a good end use, one intended by God.

The chaste person is not a person without desire. The chaste person is the person who does not let his or her desire obscure either right behavior or the worth of the other person before God. A chaste person does not stir up desire when it is not going to have the good end of a mutual emotional giving–with the real and not-overly-distant possibility that this might eventually be within marriage–with another person but is only going to cause a struggle for self-control. Refraining from stirring up desire, though, isn’t the same as not having it.

Don’t beat yourself up for having passions. Rather, try to put yourself in a position to master them. Do you see the difference? You can’t make a dog play dead forever. You don’t want it so weak it can’t jump up. You want it to be disciplined so that it doesn’t jump on anyone. You also don’t put the dog in a position where its level of discipline is not equal to the level of self-control necessary to avoid disaster. You don’t make it sleep in the smoke house full of hams and then beat it when it nabs one of them.

Our life would be poor without emotions, but our life will be poor and chaotic if they ever get even a regular turn as the master. We have dogs that alert us when we have visitors, but the dog doesn’t get to decide if the visitor is a friend or an enemy. We decide that. Our emotions, likewise, ought to be treated as faithful-but-not-fully-rational companions that tell us about ourselves and serve us.
 
For something to be a sin it needs to be a grave matter, it needs to be done with full knowledge, and it needs full consent of the will.

I don’t know what you mean by impure feelings, as this could be a great many things.

It is not a sin to enjoy music in most cases.

Music has been a part of worship life since the Old Testament - the Psalms are songs which praise God, express sadness, even plead with God. Music is supposed to make us feel things and it is a way that many people are able to get closer to God.

Now some music is intended to convey negative emotions - anger, hatred, loneliness, despair, alienation, abuse, lust, rage… etc. Listening to something like this is different, especially if you have heard it before and know it is going to fill you with darkness. Going back to this is not a good idea, but even that is not necessarily a sin unless you embrace those emotions and even desire to act out on them.

And some of these negative emotions can even do us good from time to time, so long as we do not seek them out obsessively - sometimes we can and should feel angry, sorrowful, or lonely if we have a legitimate cause to. In these cases, such music can help us understand what we are feeling, and console us and help us process our emotions. It’s only when we linger on them too long that they become problematic and sinful. Though things like lust, hatred, and rage should definitely be avoided in music, as these negative emotions will seldom do anyone any good.
 
ibelongtochrist said:
Hello there,

This is my first time posting a new thread, and I am so happy to have found this sight.
Here is my dilemma:

Lately, I have been having raging hormones. I do not start them, but sometimes they just come and I ignore them like I would an impure thought. Now, I listened to a beautiful song from a christian based movie soundtrack a while ago. As I listened to it, I had those impure feelings again. I kept listening to the song to not focus on my feelings but to try and train myself not to feel this way whenever I hear it. I was focusing on the beautiful meaning of the song (I believe its about Heaven). Anyway I stopped listening to it, but felt very guilty. Did I commit mortal sin?

I knew that song would do that to me, but I listened anyway, not to enjoy those feelings, but to focus on the beautiful meaning. I did not want those feelings, but when I hear that song, they come. I have stopped listening to that song because I read that if anything causes to “stir love early”, you must avoid it in the future. My question is, what do I do if while I am listening to holy music (like christian or even gregorian chant) or even watching a good movie or show (that is not immoral) and I start feeling those hormones again? Stop listening to good music and watching good films? My intention is not to welcome them, but I feel guilty because sometimes I feel like I am keeping them by listening to music, even if its christian or worship music.

I am going to confession to clear it up and get it off my conscience, but I still would like some feedback.

Thank you for hearing me out.
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Impure thought? I mean if you had only the purest of thoughts, to use your terminology, then Humanity would disappear. Males are attracted to females and vice-versa. To clear cut pure vs impure thought it is very very hard.

Something wild comes to your mind while awake and during sleep. Is there any difference. According to Psychology, none.

If everybody controlled God-given sex, there would be no more humans on Earth. I do not like the word " control". I prefer the word “balance”, A balanced and harmonious sex attitude.
 
Easter Joy, thanks for your reply to raging hormones and to raging hormones ; no no no it is in no way a mortal sin
 
It could be Satan trying to tempt you. If it keeps happening when you’re doing something holy, say a Hail Mary and then prayer to St. Michael the Archangel. Here’s the short version:
Saint Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle, be our protection against the malice and snares of the devil. May God rebuke him we humbly pray; and do thou, O Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God, thrust into hell Satan and all evil spirits who wander through the world for the ruin of souls. Amen.
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Going to confession is a good idea too; as if it is some sort of demonic presence, the words of absolution can break it.

A similar thing happened to me last night as I was falling asleep listening to one of Fr. Chad Ripperger’s talks on the Last Four Things. Lord knows Fr. Ripperger, FSSP and his talks aren’t an occasion of sin, but Satan sure wouldn’t like them. As soon as I realized what was occurring, I did the aforementioned and I’ll be going to confession on Saturday to deal with this, even if it has just been a week since my last confession. sigh This has never been a problem before.
 
Thank you everyone for your imput. I will be going to confession very soon. By immoral or impure feelings I mean arrousal. It’s just really annoying (I like music to deal with feelings as well), because lately, and literally just days ago, I have been having this problem that whenever I hear music (sometimes even with christian singers like Britt Nicole or Matthew West) which is praising God, I start feeling arroused. I pray to not focus on them and because I am scrupulous (another ongoing battle I seem to be having) I feel like oh, wait, I know this is wrong, and maybe I allowed them to go on a little longer than they should have. I will definately ask the priest my next confession. I have been going to confession often lately (weekly), but I am starting to see progress, so thank God. I will just keep my head up and know that if I don’t want them, then its not full consent and it is not a mortal sin. Thank you everyone again, especially EasterJoy and Dan Daly.

I now have a better understanding from everyone 👍

Thank you Love Divine for sharing the same feelings I have as well.

So, is it alright for me to enjoy music (that does not obviously glorify evil or bad things) even with these feelings or arrousal, but to just ignore them? Or completely stop the music, say a prayer, and do something else?
 
Dan_Daly said:
If an occassion of sin is avoidable, you have a duty to avoid it. There is no reason that you HAVE to listen to that song. So if it is leading you into sin, or the temptation to sin, stop listening to it. Same goes for the tv shows and movies. If there is no NEED to watch them, and they are a source of temptation- don’t watch them.

Getting to the sacrament of Penance is the right move, and you are wise to be going. Frequent Communion and frequent confession are essential to development of all the virtues, especially purity. Surround yourself with good Catholic friends that encourage you in your faith, and pray often- a daily rosary is a good part of that.

God Bless and Pax.
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Thank you for your advice. You are very right, I do NOT need to listen to them, but sometimes when I feel discouraged or would like to hear good praise music that pleases God, I like to listen to it. You are still right though, all the same. I will remember this next time 🙂
 
Love_Divine said:
It could be Satan trying to tempt you. If it keeps happening when you’re doing something holy, say a Hail Mary and then prayer to St. Michael the Archangel. Here’s the short version:

Going to confession is a good idea too; as if it is some sort of demonic presence, the words of absolution can break it.
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Haha, my mom always tells me this! Thank you very much. He likes to bother me alot I suppose… Or I simply let him 🤷
 
ibelongtochrist said:
Hello there,

This is my first time posting a new thread, and I am so happy to have found this sight.
Here is my dilemma:

Lately, I have been having raging hormones. I do not start them, but sometimes they just come and I ignore them like I would an impure thought. Now, I listened to a beautiful song from a christian based movie soundtrack a while ago. As I listened to it, I had those impure feelings again. I kept listening to the song to not focus on my feelings but to try and train myself not to feel this way whenever I hear it. I was focusing on the beautiful meaning of the song (I believe its about Heaven). Anyway I stopped listening to it, but felt very guilty. Did I commit mortal sin?

I knew that song would do that to me, but I listened anyway, not to enjoy those feelings, but to focus on the beautiful meaning. I did not want those feelings, but when I hear that song, they come. I have stopped listening to that song because I read that if anything causes to “stir love early”, you must avoid it in the future. My question is, what do I do if while I am listening to holy music (like christian or even gregorian chant) or even watching a good movie or show (that is not immoral) and I start feeling those hormones again? Stop listening to good music and watching good films? My intention is not to welcome them, but I feel guilty because sometimes I feel like I am keeping them by listening to music, even if its christian or worship music.

I am going to confession to clear it up and get it off my conscience, but I still would like some feedback.

Thank you for hearing me out.
Click to expand...
What song was it?
 
Yeah this is definitely not the normal response that most people have to music, particularly that with a Christian theme.

There isn’t necessarily anything wrong with arousal in and of itself if you are not acting on it, but repeated occurrences could lead to this. Do you experience this kind of feeling in other holy settings?

It is hard to be young and dealing with such things, I do remember those days well. Keep at it. It will get better with time, but they were hard years for me. Just keep your eyes and your mind on God.
 
joshrp said:
What song was it?
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It was the song “It couldn’t be” by Imogen Heap. It is not a bad song, I have no idea why I feel like this; I do not get impure thoughts though.

But (also in response to Humupower), I think this all started when I searched on the internet if Catholics shouldn’t listen to certain types of music. I know that obviously songs that glorify or give the main message of evil or wrong things are bad, but I went into this non-catholic website (I could tell by the way they were interpreting scripture passages and the name of the website; I didn’t realize it until later on) that said that certain genres of music are bad, and that some vocals and the sounds made in the music are bad. I never would have really thought about this until I read that darn sight. sigh yes this will take time, but it is frustrating. I keep praying though.
 
Humupower said:
Yeah this is definitely not the normal response that most people have to music, particularly that with a Christian theme.

There isn’t necessarily anything wrong with arousal in and of itself if you are not acting on it, but repeated occurrences could lead to this. Do you experience this kind of feeling in other holy settings?

It is hard to be young and dealing with such things, I do remember those days well. Keep at it. It will get better with time, but they were hard years for me. Just keep your eyes and your mind on God.
Click to expand...
Yes, this is definitely NOT normal. I don’t feel this way in other holy settings, unless of course I think about it, but that happens to almost everyone (dont think of x… what do you think of? x) I am very much into being chaste from my own home, but especially after hearing Jason and Crystalina Evert talk (thank God for them). They cleared up alot of things. Thank you for the encouragement.
 
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