How to Help a Neighbor

[mullenpm]

I have a male neighbor who is very ill; he has Parkinson and appears to me to be declining very rapidly. Quite by accident, I recently discovered that he is a Catholic and when I found that out I asked him if I could put his name on a list for the Priest at our Parish to visit him.

He very quickly, and firmly, said NO. I am worried about his Soul but I don’t know what to do. He is a homosexual; and even though he is in his late 50’s neighbors say he is still active in that life style. He is a very private person and it is not easy to get to know him.

I cannot let him die in a state of Mortal Sin. How must I approach this dilemna?

We have two Priests who live in our apartment building - one a retired Monsignor and the other a Chaplin at a hospital. I had thought about approaching one of them, preferably the younger Priest, without naming the neighbor.

I would welcome any advice.

 

[EmeraldWings]

well, if he doesn’t want your help or help from the church, just pray for him, that’s the best thing to do, and it would also be a good idea to ask your priest to have a mass said for him, just ask him to announce it as a special intention so he doesn’t have to say his name,
prayer is best right now *because *you don’t know what to do, but God does, so just leave it in His hands.
but even if this man doesn’t turn around now, that doesn’t mean your prayers won’t help him after he dies.

 

[Ruthie]

I think you have already given yourself some good advice:

We have two Priests who live in our apartment building - one a retired Monsignor and the other a Chaplin at a hospital. I had thought about approaching one of them, preferably the younger Priest, without naming the neighbor.

You might add your parish priest to that list.

Ruthie

 

[SwizzleStick]

…I cannot let him die in a state of Mortal Sin. How must I approach this dilemna? …:

I don’t think there is much you can do for your neighbor now but pray, pray and pray some more for him. You tried, now the choice is his.

Most of us have family members and friends, people we love, who are fallen away Catholics who are living a lifestyle that differs from the teachings of the Catholic Church. We worry about them and their souls and we do try to steer them back Home to Holy Mother Church and Her teachings. We can do it gently, we can do it a bit more forcefully, we can fight about it even. But, all we can do is try and the ultimate choice is theirs to make because God did give them free will. What if they refuse to come back and be reconciled with the Church? What is our recourse then? I think the answer is the same for family, friends or even neighbors we don’t know very well and that is to pray, pray and pray some more.

 

[mullenpm]

I want to thank everyone who responded to my question with love and advice.

I did pray and pray for guidance. Recently this neighbor had a fall in his apartment (I didn’t pray for that) and was taken to the hospital. I visited him there and in our conversation I again asked him if I may have someone from the parish visit him. He said YES!!!

I am so happy. I called the parish office and asked the secretary to please have the Priest visit my neighbor. She said she would be pleased to take care of it.:dancing: :clapping:

 

[Tracy10]

The best way to save people’s souls is to display the kindness in your own soul versus using it to judge others.

The latter type of behaviour is called overly-righteousness and is dangerous. Hitler sincerely believed he was doing the world good when he decided he would better it by exterminating people whose souls he considered unworthy compared to his own beautiful & spiritual soul.

If those of us judging others had the type of humility God would wish us to have, we would realize we should have enough serious concerns worrying about our own souls. Indeed, if we concentrated more on bettering our own souls, we would be so well respected by others and would attract so many sinners to our lifestyles that there would be few souls left to save.

 

[mullenpm]

I was greatly saddened by your posting telling me to worry about my own soul instead of my neighbor’s.

How judgmental of you, and mean-spirited.

I was sincerely worried about my neighbor because he is now nearing death and I wanted to make sure that he had the comfort of the Last Sacraments. He had resisted earlier attempts by other neighbors.

In my apartment building we are like family and care deeply about each other.

:hug3:

 

[ThatGuy]

I’m so glad he said yes to having someone from the parish visit him! Maybe, on top of this, you could ask him to pray with you? That could possibly help soften any hardness he may have in his heart agaisnt God or the church. Maybe it would help him further open up.

The most important thing though is to let him know that you care. Keep being a loving neighbor and keep praying! I will be praying along with you!