How To Stop Swearing

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PonderingJak

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Hello, a problem I’ve had for a long time is my swearing. Not out loud, I rarely do that. But it my head. I don’t know if other people have experienced this, but in elementary and middle school, I was exposed to (and participated in) a lot of swearing, and will probably be exposed to a lot more in high school (I’m 14). How do I keep evil words from running rampant through my head? Ever since a couple months ago, I’ve stopped swearing almost altogether. But I can’t stop my mind. Like for example if I meet a really unkind person, one of the things that will pop through my head might be something such as, “a**hole… NO STOP…” after I catch myself. But how do I stop it from happening in the first place? Thank you in advance to all who post solutions.
 
Imprint a new word to replace bad ones, FARM TRUCKS works for me,
 
I agree with mentally replacing the profane words with more acceptable choices. I used to swear up a storm. Then I started working with a guy who cussed even more than I did. Before I knew it, we were each upping the ante. I really wasn’t even aware I was doing it until the day I unleashed a torrent that was foul beyond belief in front of my wife and very young son. I decided right then and there to put an end to it. It took a while but now if anyone hears me swear, even something minor, they’re shocked.
 
Try to stop at the time you’re about to swear, and use different words. You won’t have 100% success right off the bat, but it works.
 
chevalier said:
Try to stop at the time you’re about to swear, and use different words. You won’t have 100% success right off the bat, but it works.
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Sadly , the tounge gets into gear before the mind engages the Clutch ,
That’s that pedal thingy beside the brake thingy in the car, well most people drive automatics ,
:p:p:D
 
It may come up in your mind but you can choose to ignore it and don’t say it.
Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.Ephesians 4:29
 
phil_at_dayboro said:
Sadly , the tounge gets into gear before the mind engages the Clutch ,
That’s that pedal thingy beside the brake thingy in the car, well most people drive automatics ,
:p:p:D
Click to expand...
It’s difficult, but you can find a small time window to make a decision to go on or stop. The longer you practice it, the earlier you end up being able to hold your tongue, and at some point you end up not swearing at all any more. 🙂 Even when your first steps had more to do with being quicker to apologize for it and pray for help. 😉
 
I’ll say from personal experience that it takes a really long time to retrain your brain. And it usually doesn’t happen when you think things like, “Stop thinking about an elephant.” (Because then all you think of is elephants.)

One trick I learned for driving, where you encounter a lot of…ahem, distracted or perhaps aggressive drivers, is to purposefully imagine reasons that would lessen their culpability or explain their odd behavior. “Maybe they had to rush to the hospital” is a good one. I have found that over time I am bothered a lot less when people are rude on the road, and no longer get personally offended. That could be a strategy you could try when you encounter a person who says or does something rude. The thought pops up in your mind that the person is a jerk (or worse word), and you think to yourself, “Maybe this person received some bad news today/had a bad nights’ sleep/is frustrated over x, y, z.” Like as not it’s true anyway.

I will say that when a thought comes into your mind unbidden, in no way are you culpable for it. It’s not fun that it comes to mind, but obsessing over it will not help (will actually probably make it worse). When I stub my toe, I still tend to think a four-letter phrase - but I don’t say it (anymore). I’m not around people who swear much, and even in high school it’s possible to avoid hanging out with people who like being vulgar, though there’s not much you can do about random shouts in the hallway.
 
The bad news is that expletives are stored differently and fly through the speech systems of the brain differently than other kinds of speech.

Ask any speech therapist who works with stroke victims. The poor person will be struggling mightily to make anything they want to say intelligible, and then in frustration will let out a perfectly-articulated expletive! What we say without thinking, we say with a different part of our brains. When stricken with dementia, little old ladies that you think don’t even KNOW a bad word will swear so as to make a sailor blush. It is the same brain reality, coming to the fore.

The best thing is to not start using swear words. What to do afterwards? I agree with those who suggesting finding alternatives. It better be a pretty satisfying alternative, though, such that it is actually what you come to think and not just the substitute word that you say when you can’t bite your tongue.

What you think automatically could some day be what you say because you have lost your ability to inhibit your speech. Plan accordingly, and try to form your true mental habits towards that end.

Once you have lost your innocence, practicing better is all you can do.
 
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