Tis_Bearself
Patron
I was married for 23 years to someone I was close to for 10 years prior to that.
I always considered him my best friend, including after we were married, because he was. During some phases of my life, I considered him not only my best friend, but my only friend.
If you and your wife choose to not think of each other as “friends” because you find it helpful to think of yourselves as something different, then that’s fine, that’s what works for you. This is a decision highly subjective to each couple. I would not have wanted to marry anyone I didn’t consider a great friend, and he didn’t act any more or less “chivalrous” to me after we became a couple/ got engaged/ got married. He had great respect for me during all phases of our dealings with each other, I did not turn into something different in his eyes when I became a girlfriend, fiancee, or wife, and I was very happy I didn’t.
I always considered him my best friend, including after we were married, because he was. During some phases of my life, I considered him not only my best friend, but my only friend.
If you and your wife choose to not think of each other as “friends” because you find it helpful to think of yourselves as something different, then that’s fine, that’s what works for you. This is a decision highly subjective to each couple. I would not have wanted to marry anyone I didn’t consider a great friend, and he didn’t act any more or less “chivalrous” to me after we became a couple/ got engaged/ got married. He had great respect for me during all phases of our dealings with each other, I did not turn into something different in his eyes when I became a girlfriend, fiancee, or wife, and I was very happy I didn’t.
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