Hows a Catholic who likes living in a small town supposed to find a spouse?

[WildCatholic]

Are you opposed to dating someone a little long distance. Just because they are from the city now, doesn’t mean they wouldn’t move to a smaller town if they married you.

It depends what you mean by distance. If its within 2 hours or so than no i’m not, but over about 3 hours is a little much. I know a girl would move for me, or i could move for her. Its just that if she moved with me it’d be hard to find a job, and being a teacher a 2nd income is kind of needed

 

[Mimi20]

It depends what you mean by distance. If its within 2 hours or so than no i’m not, but over about 3 hours is a little much. I know a girl would move for me, or i could move for her. Its just that if she moved with me it’d be hard to find a job, and being a teacher a 2nd income is kind of needed

Not to say that you haven’t already, but give some prayer to the thought of expanding your search. If you’re called to be married I would think one would focus more on the quality of the person met regardless of the distance; not simply hope to find someone within a 100mi radius. God works wonders when all is said and done. (Food for thought.)

 

[Ms_Manners]

Not to be rude, but I did CatholicMatch actually.I think it’s great, but it just hasn’t worked for me. Especially since so many are from so far away

I met my husband online as well. But not on a dating site, just on a forum we both go to.
I know several other people on that forum who met there, fell in love and got married.

 

[PatriceA]

I will do that. I haven’t been praying enough. My thing with online dating though, I can’t change it. The few girls I’ve become facebook friends with live too far away, and where i’m going to be living there aren’t many girls in the state unless its like over 5 hours away. Thats too tough. How can a relationship develop with that much distance? Also i’d rather start meeting people the old fashioned way. Its hard and will get harder, but who knows. Think of it this way, if I get this job, since i’m a teacher, there might and its a big might, be another teacher who’s single and might be attractive and into me and all that. Its a big guess but who knows?

I think praying is really the key. Are you going to continue to try and steer the boat or are you going to finally let God steer you to a potential spouse? You have to let God be in charge. He can use your circumstances to lead you to a spouse, any circumstance, be it small town, big city, medium size city, etc, etc. He can use your job, your hobbies, your church groups, your community groups, etc, etc to lead you to your future wife. You can take the job of the teacher, and there might be another single teacher… or there might be a married teacher with a really great sister that is single and is your perfect match. You’ve got to get out of seeing things so conventional, and start to see that God thinks outside of the box. Go to adoration, pray and pray some more and let God be in control of the search.

 

[mcc804]

I agree with the advice to commit this to prayer. With God all things are possible. Distance doesn’t have to be a deal breaker. Additionally, you mentioned needing a second income in whomever you marry. Have you given any thought to having a family and the children needing a mother to be at home with them? If you are a serious, practicing Catholic, you understand that you will likely be the father of a fairly good sized family. Asking your future wife to stay in a career to supplement your income can come at a great cost to the children and to your marriage. Please give it some thought. God Bless.

 

[WildCatholic]

I agree with the advice to commit this to prayer. With God all things are possible. Distance doesn’t have to be a deal breaker. Additionally, you mentioned needing a second income in whomever you marry. Have you given any thought to having a family and the children needing a mother to be at home with them? If you are a serious, practicing Catholic, you understand that you will likely be the father of a fairly good sized family. Asking your future wife to stay in a career to supplement your income can come at a great cost to the children and to your marriage. Please give it some thought. God Bless.

I have given it some thought. Being a teacher, at first it would be tough. I’d only make at most 32,000 a year at a public school and about $8000 less at a Catholic school, so it would be difficult to raise a family on just this one income. I know there are ways to do it, but it seems difficult. I guess I’ll have to stay single if i’m poor or work on getting a better paying job

 

[Sillara]

I have given it some thought. Being a teacher, at first it would be tough. I’d only make at most 32,000 a year at a public school and about $8000 less at a Catholic school, so it would be difficult to raise a family on just this one income. I know there are ways to do it, but it seems difficult. I guess I’ll have to stay single if i’m poor or work on getting a better paying job

It is possible to raise a family on a VERY low income. My husband didn’t make much more than that when we first married, and though I worked, too, I quit, with his blessing and encouragement, when our first baby came along.

It can be done! Hang in there, and actively search for a spouse. Having discerned a vocation to marriage, oughtn’t it to be your goal to start living that vocation as soon as possible?

I always figured it should be. We are not Protestants. We recognise that our vocations are the main thing, ahead of jobs and circumstances. Why are we not actively seeking our vocations, seeking the matter of our sacrament?

 

[acadiANNA]

The posters have given you great insight. My second thoughts:
Small town or not, I am sure others there are in the state of married life. It is possible for you as well. Don’t give up hope. Also, when you find someone you care about, make sure she is the right one. Ask God for what you want, in prayer. Remain close to Him by faithful attendance at Mass and receive the Holy Eucharist. Make God first in your life and second would be finding a wife. It will come together in order. Praying that God will grant you the desires of your life, asking this through Our Lord, Jesus Christ.

 

[livingwordunity]

My wife and I met on CatholicMatch.com and have now been married for over 9 years with two beautiful daughters. Here’s the website link:
catholicmatch.com/

And here’s a link to a review of the website given by CatholicCulture.Org:
catholicculture.org/culture/reviews/view.cfm?recnum=1021&repos=2&subrepos=0&searchid=1017085

Not to be rude, but I did CatholicMatch actually.I think it’s great, but it just hasn’t worked for me. Especially since so many are from so far away

My wife and I got together through CatholicMatch.com despite living far away from each other. I think that’s the point of the advantage of meeting through CatholicMatch. It makes it possible for a Catholic man to meet the right Catholic woman even if they live far away because often the one who is right for you won’t be someone who lives close by.

 

[WildCatholic]

My wife and I got together through CatholicMatch.com despite living far away from each other. I think that’s the point of the advantage of meeting through CatholicMatch. It makes it possible for a Catholic man to meet the right Catholic woman even if they live far away because often the one who is right for you won’t be someone who lives close by.

Maybe it works for people who’ve had dating experience, but i’ll be honest, i’ve had next to none. I’ve only asked one girl out that wasn’t online and i’ve only gone past the 2nd date once. Not that i’m giving up, but lets just say my dating skills aren’t that great