Husband is addicted to movie watching

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sabita

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Iam 28 years old and married for 8 months. I am a converted catholic and I love living a good life in Christ. My husband is non-catholic, but he is a good and kind person and practices his religion well.

My problem is, He is too much addicted to movies,TV Series and in gaming.
I am not so.I watch movies, only if I feel that is good. I don’t play silly mobile games.I think I am correct.He always living with electronic things.Though he loves me , I feel like his best part is watching plenty of movies and getting scored in gaming.
Even before sleeping what he do is gaming or watching TV.
I dont know my opinion is correct on that,As a Catholic I see these kind of addictions are kind of evil.Useless habits and can cause into ruining human relationships.
Please Give me a Solution / or What is your opinion on this?
 
These are worldly things. Yeah, it could be fun but it comes with a price. Watching too many movies can waste money which he could have used it for charity work. Playing too many video games could be unhealthy for the body. Lastly, his focus on movies and games all the time means he has less time to spend with you which is not good for both relationship. It has been said over and over again that we can only choose one master.
 
Approximately how much time does he spend doing these things each day?
 
That’s key question. It’s matter of scope. If so much that interferes with your relationship or his ability to perform basic duties, then time for a chat. It is increasingly common in today’s culture but that doesn’t make it an excuse. I used to play over 6-7 hours video games per day. Not healthy. It was a way of escaping the world but later realized I was missing out on life.
 
Does he ever unplug?
Do you ever talk face to face without a screen handy?
You don’t need to have deep conversations every day.
You also don’t need an electronic device in your hand every moment.
How does he treat you? Does he act like your presence is imposing on his screen time?
OTOH, are you constantly in his face or being too needy for attention?
Do you have interests or things you enjoy apart from him or do you want him to be present at all times?
 
There’s a big difference between “he is addicted to movies/ tv/ gaming” and “he spends more time on movies/ tv/ gaming than I myself prefer or think is proper.”

If the man is living a responsible life and practicing his religion well and loves you, then it doesn’t sound like this is an addiction. An addiction suggests that he has trouble breaking away from it to do anything else, like his job. It sounds more like a habit or preference that you don’t like/ disagree with.

I would suggest that you talk to him about the time he spends on these activities and maybe ask if he could set aside particular times, such as an hour a day or whatever works for you two, to “unplug” and do some activity with you that you enjoy. And then if he does that, let him spend the rest of his time relaxing in the way he enjoys.

My own husband always had the TV running (a habit he clearly got from his parents as it was on all day every day at their house too) and would be working or playing on the computer, either games or Internet, while he was watching the TV. It was how he relaxed. It was no big deal as I spend hours on the Internet too and the biggest thing that bothered me about it was sometimes the TV noise gave me a headache, so he would put it on low volume or mute with closed captions. I spent many happy days lazing around with him with our respective electronic devices. No biggie.
 
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It is an escape from his reality. I’ve done it too, my son does it now.

I found enhancing my real life helped me to alter that behaviour, that and maturity. So enhancing actual reality his life is one way to alter things. However I’ve heard of golf widows, darts widows, bowling widows etc. The video game thing is slightly more complex imo but it’s all on a similar vein.

Moderation in all things.
 
Arguing about who’s right and who’s wrong doesn’t go anywhere in marriage. Taking the moral high ground goes no where. Lecturing your spouse on their moral failings and talking down to them goes no where.

The big thing is to have clear healthy boundaries. This involves arguing only about the HOW and WHEN your needs get met. You both have to do lists. You have things you need to do for yourselves, for your family, and for your marriage. Not EVERYTHING can be done. Balancing out TV and video game time is really about finding the time and discerning “When and how can I do this? Is there a better way?”

When it comes to dealing with our spouses vices, we can’t control them, but we can refrain from enabling them. So pay attention to tasks he’s committed to doing. Be okay with him learning his lesson through natural consequences. If you can let it go and let him suffering the natural consequence, he’ll more likely move to fix the situation for himself than if you’re constantly picking up after him while voicing your resentment.

If he’s neglecting doing something you can’t let go, recognize that in taking over, you’re making yourself less available to him. So when he asks you for something, you have to recognize your own limits. “I’d love to help you there, and I would have been able to had you helped me out here, but right now I’m in over my head. Perhaps in the future we could work on our teamwork.”
 
Thank you Very much for giving a reasonable an detailed reply. THis helped me to think something than in my own vision.
Thanks you for giving your time to replying me.
God Bless You !
 
Thank you Very much for your answer. This helped me to think broad and to see the good things in my husband and to see my own negativity.
God Bless You !
 
thank you Very much for giving time to answer. This is helpful for me to be a understandable partner and to respect his hobbies in leisure time and to think more than my own vision.

God Bless you!!
 
Thank you very much for the answer. this helped me to know that everything is moderated and this is the world today.So i need to be adjust and to respect his hobbies .

Thanks and God bless!
 
thanks for giving me a reasonable answer considering both parts. heplped me out to think out of my own little world.
Thanks and God BLess!!
 
Thank you Very much for your answer. This helped me to think broad and to see the good things in my husband and to see my own negativity.
God Bless You !
 
Thank you Very much for your answer. This helped me to think broad and to see the good things in my husband and to see my own negativity and to think positive.
God Bless You !
 
sabita said:
My problem is, He is too much addicted to movies,TV Series and in gaming.
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It’s been, err, a while, but . . . . back when we were dating, I was watching a football game, and she came up and kissed me.

I ignored the game and kissed back.

She was satisfied that I could be distracted, and that was that. 😇\

Three decades later, she still boasts about that . . .

(of course, these days, I won’t watch an NFL game until they decide my country is good enough for them, but that’s another matter. I’m not boycotting; it’s induced but sincere indifference).

hawk
 
Another thought here…How much time do ALL of us spend with our little blue screens and electronic devices??? Moderation is key…And I think younger people are focusing more on experiences rather than things…I guarantee that a beautiful sunset can inspire more awe and wonder than the latest gadget…

Also, maybe there is a good, classic film that both of you could watch on occasion and get something out of…Keep in mind that a lot of good stories have been told and there are sites like this…


Here is a list of interesting films, too…

http://www.ncregister.com/info/top_100_pro_catholic_movies

Movies are not totally non-Catholic, according to this…

http://www.ncregister.com/blog/steven-greydanus/no_movies_please

We may have to look for the good stories a bit more, but they are out there…I do sense that people want decent, wholesome entertainment out there that doesn’t pander, that doesn’t patronize or talk down to people, but enlightens them, encourages them, inspires them to be better human beings…If you ask me, reality right now is NEGATIVE enough!

But, those are just “my two cents” to add to the pile…Take those thoughts as you wish…
 
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