Husband not on board with NFP

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

there is the stuff underneath that. My husband and I spoke last night about this issue in depth. He is not trying to force me to go on he pill. He understands my issues with it which are medical as well as spiritual. I am not willing to put toxins into my body and when I explained it like that he completely understood. He has said if I am not comfortable with a vasectomy then he will use condoms. Now I’m not really happy with that either, but I guess that’s his choice, his thing to live with. He doesn’t see it as a sin, just a modern day choice & a sensible thing to do when you don’t want anymore children.

I must say that my husband is not a “natural father”. He has welcomed all of our children with love but he is not (by his own admission) cut out for more kids. In some ways this really annoys me because to be honest, I do everything anyway. But he finds being a sole provider for us extremely stressful and I guess I can’t really blame him for that.

He told me emphatically last night that a fourth child would break him and that he already feels under immense pressure. Rest assured he does love us very very much

This is a positive step. He has listened to you in regards to doing things to your body our his.

I think he would do really good to join a men’s group. Very few men are “natural fathers” and most struggle greatly with young children who need mommy more.

Your annoyance is understandable, but at the same time, it may be why he is feeling the way he is. I’m guessing you are trying to “shelter” him from the worst in hopes that he sees only the good. But you’re taking away a significant portion of his bonding. You are contributing to his lack of reslincy.

Is there a way you can contribute to the income? Support him in furthering education so you’d be better off? Basically, what have you done to alleviate his stress besides bear the brunt of child-raising? You don’t have to answer me, but it’s something you should think about.