Husband of 20 years leaving me

[trickster]

I am an alcoholic. After 3.5 years of continuous sobriety I relapsed. Now he is leaving me. I have been kicked out of our home, my girls won’t talk to me at all. I am honestly devastated. I was released from teaching confirmation and the DRE and Priest didn’t even bother to tell me.
I need prayers

Husbands leaving you and daughters not talking to you - might be a blessing in disguise…think about it…that’s not to say reconciliation is not in the future, it’s just saying that you are being stripped of everything to help you refocus on you and what is important to you…who are you…what does God want you to do…you have the opportunity to abandon all and focus on the Lord… Reconciliation will be with between your daughters, your husband and most importantly - your authentic self… and that’s who i sense you need to reclaim.

I have my challenges too with depression and alcohol, so i hear you loud and clear. Prayers are good but I hope that you are reaching within yourself to find your strength…Creator has given you the ability to enjoy the fullness of creation and that is within your reach.

You are now in a wonderful place; a place of isolation of being alone. You are in that place Jesus was on Mt. Olive praying like hell to find a loophole around the upcoming crucifixion. He was alone, abandoned, so you know that he will understand. Within that you have power.

I have found SMART (Self-management and Recovery Training) very good cause it is not AA based and focuses on your cognitive skills; there is also the 16 Steps which is a feminist recovery program that focuses on our strengths as opposed to our “sickness” or “failures” as AA members (not the AA program) tend to emphasis.

I thank the people praying for you, but my prayer for you is you find that little flame within yourself that will help you muster every ounce of strength you may have to decide to take charge of this situation, empowered by the Lord and supportive friends…you can do this.

trickster
Bruce Ferguson

 

[tundramom]

Thank you Bruce. I am also doing CBT with a behavioral health counselor and it does seem to help.

Steph

 

[trickster]

Thank you Bruce. I am also doing CBT with a behavioral health counselor and it does seem to help.

Steph

Very cool. what is CBT? As I struggle too with what you are talking about so I am always open to new things or different strategies that also help me in that wondeful journey of alcoholism

Bruce Ferguson
Trickster (Indigenous Symbol for Transformation).

 

[tundramom]

CBT is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. It seems like it helps stop the thought process before you get into the craving/planning stage. So far so good! My oldest daughter, 24, stopped by for a visit last night. It was soooooo nice to see her. We didn’t talk about anything in depth. Just superficial talk about what she’s been doing, but it’s a start!

Steph

 

[trickster]

CBT is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. It seems like it helps stop the thought process before you get into the craving/planning stage. So far so good! My oldest daughter, 24, stopped by for a visit last night. It was soooooo nice to see her. We didn’t talk about anything in depth. Just superficial talk about what she’s been doing, but it’s a start!

Steph

ah, ok… I think that is what SMART recovery is based on … the cognitive processes…

 

[tundramom]

ah, ok… I think that is what SMART recovery is based on … the cognitive processes…

I think so too. It’s a very good thing on it’s own, but I do like having my 12 step program along with it. CBT doesn’t include a whole lot of spirituality and I need that!

Steph

 

[Serap]

Thank you all so much. I met with my Priest and he apologized about how they had handled releasing me from teaching. I know it was for the best both for me and my students. I need to concentrate on staying sober.

Meanwhile, my husband is still not budging. He is convinced that we need to be divorced and will not consider Retrouvaille.

Continued prayers are needed. My girls still won’t speak to me and it’s been almost 3 months.

Steph

Give it time. They are very angry and disappointed. Continue being sober. Eventually things will come to light for you.

 

[trickster]

I think so too. It’s a very good thing on it’s own, but I do like having my 12 step program along with it. CBT doesn’t include a whole lot of spirituality and I need that!

Steph

Agreed…

 

[HouseArrest]

I will pray, too.

 

[k2912p]

Hi Steph,

I had another idea. There’s something called Brain Core Therapy. It’s neurofeedback-based, and studies have shown that, for instance, alcoholics who undergo this as well as therapy are FAR less likely to relapse. (I believe that it was something like 77% were abstinent at 12 months compared to 44% in the control group) I am a Brain Core therapy tech, and it really works. You can check it out at www.braincoretherapy.com.

You will be in my prayers. Keep up the good work!

-Kris

 

[tundramom]

Thanks Kris,
I will look into this! After 3.5 years of sobriety I had a series of mini-strokes in December. I’ve relapsed 5 times since then.

Steph

 

[mlz]

Prayers for you and your family. Do not feel alone, ever! Jesus will never abandon you although sometimes people do. Work and pray hard (along with all the therapies that help) to stay sober. I will pray!

mlz

 

[R_Cuda]

Our adversary the devil never sleeps nor should we. Pray, go to confession, make reparation, learn and live the Fatima message, read the book “healing your family tree”. You’ve got some work to do. I’ll pray. Mass, rosary, adoration. Be on guard till you cross the finish line! God bless.