I am afraid!

[PCalungsod]

For those of you who are able to find out about your vocation (whether it be being married, single blessedness or priesthood/nun), did you feel any fear at some point during your discernment process? I can feel that the Lord is calling me to priesthood after asking some definite signs to Him (all points out to the vocation of priesthood). I feel “fearful” or afraid that I might not able to respond to this call because of the following reasons.

1. Although I can feel the calling, there is still a part of me where I can imagine myself having a family
2. I am an only child. I worry who’s gonna help (financially, physically) my parents if ever I decided to “enter” the seminary. And when they’re old already, who’s gonna take care of /support them?
3. it seems to me that dad does not want me to enter priesthood
4. I’m already graduating from college next year. It would be quite a disadvantage to me if I suddenly shift my course.

Thoughts? Advice?

 

[pmoo]

Wow, how wonderful you feel God speaking to you and moving you in the direction of the priesthood.

I will tell you that our own pastor has spoken honestly about his time in the seminary and taking his vows. He has said he had doubts, wondering to himself, "Is this the right choice? " However, he took his vows and is an amazing priest.

First, you should choose your career based on what you want/need to do and not what your father wants.

Second, worrying about your parents is understandable. Are any of your priests a single child? Maybe the church can direct you to someone with whom you can discuss this.

Third, many people change directions in their career. However, is this something you must decide right now?:newidea:I know a priest who had an entire other career working for a politician. He wanted to be a priest, but he did not pursue it until his parents had passed.

I suggest speak to your own priest and pray on it a lot. Perhaps there is another way to serve the church? Perhaps this is something to consider later in life? Good luck to you!

 

[TheRealJuliane]

For those of you who are able to find out about your vocation (whether it be being married, single blessedness or priesthood/nun), did you feel any fear at some point during your discernment process? I can feel that the Lord is calling me to priesthood after asking some definite signs to Him (all points out to the vocation of priesthood). I feel “fearful” or afraid that I might not able to respond to this call because of the following reasons.

1. Although I can feel the calling, there is still a part of me where I can imagine myself having a family
2. I am an only child. I worry who’s gonna help (financially, physically) my parents if ever I decided to “enter” the seminary. And when they’re old already, who’s gonna take care of /support them?
3. it seems to me that dad does not want me to enter priesthood
4. I’m already graduating from college next year. It would be quite a disadvantage to me if I suddenly shift my course.

Thoughts? Advice?

Talk to the vocations director at your diocese. He will have better advice than any of us can give you. If you are called, your fears will not keep you from becoming a priest, although they might delay it somewhat. The Holy Spirit will not leave you alone, if this is your calling. Pray, pray, and talk to your priest and a vocations director.

About changing your course of study - you will probably be advised to finish your degree before entering seminary. You’ll be in seminary for another 7-8 years anyway. So your schooling is hardly over. Think of it as an extended higher degree program.

May God bless you as you discern your vocation!

 

[CaptFun]

CaptFun responds in RED

For those of you who are able to find out about your vocation (whether it be being married, single blessedness or priesthood/nun),

• I LOVE that you even included “single blessedness” as a vocation, AND not in “last place”. It is the “day to day” vocation of those who are still discerning (like you are NOW) and widows and widowers, and “retired” priests or those who no longer can do their old duties due to infirmity etc. Sometimes (because the OTHER two options are attached to vocational sacraments peculiar to them) it can SEEM like “single blessedness” is – nothing, not a vocation.

… did you feel any fear at some point during your discernment process? I can feel that the Lord is calling me to priesthood after asking some definite signs to Him (all points out to the vocation of priesthood). I feel “fearful” or afraid that I might not able to respond to this call because of the following reasons.

1. Although I can feel the calling, there is still a part of me where I can imagine myself having a family – There is a sacrifice either way. Isn’t there. So why worry? :juggle:

Sometimes we get help in this regard. In each case others are involved in whether we get to begin these vocations. Never find a spouse? No Matrimony. No Diocese or community accepts you unto completion of your ordination? No Holy Orders.

I may say, you seem to be doing quite well in asking for counsel HERE where many have been confirmed (a sacrament which should be received which ever of your three possibilities ends up being your vocation) and have the gifts of Wisdom, Knowledge, Understanding and Counsel*. God may show you what HE has in mind - or may leave it up to YOU. Our larger vocation is to be HIS follower and witness and ambassador of love and good gifts to our brothers and sisters. And as I mentioned - circumstances of one’s vocation can change (except for this constant overriding one).

1. I am an only child. I worry who’s gonna help (financially, physically) my parents if ever I decided to “enter” the seminary. And when they’re old already, who’s gonna take care of /support them? It is so great that you are considering that. IF it is not an artificial barrier to either vocation. Jesus defended the idea that children should care for their needy parents (in a time when the elderly had much less “social care” than now. But he also told the man who said " … let me bury my father … (and I will follow you)" to “let the dead bury their dead …” (in THAT case it seems (to me) Jesus detected an excuse and encouraged the man to decide NOW).

In considering Matrimony you would not put off marriage unto the death of both parents would you? Lol. I just thought of Britain’s Prince Charles … maybe not the best example of it but … in that case there’d have been no “Princes” and his odds of his marrying (for the first time) after Elizabeth’s passing on (IF he’d outlive her at ALL) would have been small. And THEN having babies at that age? Well … hmm maybe easier for royalty.

1. it seems to me that dad does not want me to enter priesthood YOUR call should take precedence … and God’s call beyond even that. Many a parent has been wrong on such things. Lou Gehrig’s parents were appalled when he began playing baseball for a living instead of being a college professor like they wanted. They learned to their delight that Louie following his heart had chosen WELL!
2. I’m already graduating from college next year. It would be quite a disadvantage to me if I suddenly shift my course.What IS your course? Most priestly vocations these days include college training. Some even pay for your education (with THEIR call of what you study, at least in part). Some communities require you be debt free or paid up to date on your bills with a plan not to negatively impact the community.

On the Matrimony path - you’d be becoming whatever you are (to make money to support a family) so I presume maybe THAT is your present “path”?

Thoughts? God loves you as you are NOW (in your single blessedness!) and has set you free to choose any number of ways to serve Him in the future too. I would think He is on your SIDE and will grace you with what you need not only to discern, but to exel in your eventual vocation (or your present one continued with additional events).

Advice? Seek the Holy Spirit in prayer as WELL as counsel from us; remembering (if you are Confirmed) that you have those gifts already with you. Our eventual destination is heaven. Our vocation NOW is to love, serve, and inspire those around us - bringing THEM with us in a closer relationship to the Lord.

Which ever road is NOT taken by us … we still get to participate in through our helping of priests and married people around us. Being an Uncle who backs up parents, and sets an example for nephews and nieces by living the faith IS being part of a Matrimony - even if you don’t get the big piece of chicken at dinner and get to be called DAD.

And much of the spiritual battle for souls takes place not with the clergy (who are like the officers in the HQ tent) but with the foot soldiers on the front lines. The laity!

• • the other three of the seven gifts we receive at Confirmation are: Fortitude, Piety and Fear-of-the-Lord. :angel1

 

[randirhoades]

Dear Friend,

I too think it wonderful to be calling you to the Priesthood! How wonderful your heart is and you’re listening to our Almighty Father. We need more good Priests. I want to become a Sister but can’t because of my disabilities and my disability checks will be cut, plus, insurance. (Medicaid) I have to obtain meds and would not want a convent to be responsible for all my health needs. I am sure convents do not have the finances to help with this.

You are right to be nervous and comprehensibly so about what will happen to your parents. But please remember that in any given situation that may be dire, whatever the reason, God has us and He will provide. Have Faith and trust. And remember the sparrows and lilies of the field that don’t worry about their nourishment but are fed; —>How much more will Almighty God do for His children(Parents) that love Him so. (And not saying He doesn’t bless all His children) And who knows, you may get a stipend which is enough to send your parents money. Further and for example, I know of Priests who sell their art for extra income for their Parishes and send money home for their ailing parents and siblings. Plus, like someone said on here there are agencies that can help when the time comes. You can contact them for food, paying rent, Home health care if they couldn’t do it for themselves and what have you- in your Parent’s community or township.

About Grandchildren and your Dad. I understand that completely. I am a first time Grandmother. My youngest daughter had a baby and my eldest is pregnant now. I am so proud and praise God so much! Yet, there are places that your parents could visit, like day care centers, become Foster parents. (State pays for this and gives them money) Also, check with hospitals that deliver babies and see if your Mom could be one of those that “rock” and “hug” newborns. And I’m wondering if there are programs for people to be a Big Grandparent, similar to the Big Brother/Big Sister program which is a volunteer program. There are kids that don’t have Grandparents or parents that would benefit from having kind, loving, mentors in their lives. These would probably help with your parent’s Grandparent “fix”. I wanted to do that.

Just suggesting and again, praise God you have it in your heart to want to do this. Your Father will come to terms with it eventually. God works in mysterious ways. And I’m sure be quite proud of the fact.

Love ya’ll lots,

Sheila is my real name. Much love, hugs, and many blessings from God to each person that lives on this planet.

 

[PerfectTiming]

For those of you who are able to find out about your vocation (whether it be being married, single blessedness or priesthood/nun), did you feel any fear at some point during your discernment process? I can feel that the Lord is calling me to priesthood after asking some definite signs to Him (all points out to the vocation of priesthood). I feel “fearful” or afraid that I might not able to respond to this call because of the following reasons.

1. Although I can feel the calling, there is still a part of me where I can imagine myself having a family
2. I am an only child. I worry who’s gonna help (financially, physically) my parents if ever I decided to “enter” the seminary. And when they’re old already, who’s gonna take care of /support them?
3. it seems to me that dad does not want me to enter priesthood
4. I’m already graduating from college next year. It would be quite a disadvantage to me if I suddenly shift my course.

Thoughts? Advice?

1. Being able to see yourself in another vocation is not a sign that you are not called. It is a sign that you are human. Marriage is a very natural desire, but it is a sacrifice we make to do the will of God.
2. If the priesthood is God’s will for you, then He will not leave you or your parents without His aid. Trust in Him.
3. My mother does not want me to enter the convent. It is a burden, I will not deny that, but God gives us the strength we need to persevere. When your father sees you fulfilled in the path God has chosen for you, he will no longer object.
4. I suggest you meet with the vocations director for your diocese and discuss the matter with them. They will advise you as to what is best.

 

[PCalungsod]

1. Being able to see yourself in another vocation is not a sign that you are not called. It is a sign that you are human. Marriage is a very natural desire, but it is a sacrifice we make to do the will of God.

OTOH, I can also see myself performing masses, administering sacraments and wearing those priestly vestments.

 

[CaptFun]

OTOH, I can also see myself performing masses, administering sacraments and wearing those priestly vestments.

Looks like you have a Win-Win situation. Or is it Win-Win-Win with the third one being the “single blessedness” vocation you have today and can add onto?!

 

[Shatterpoint]

I’m assuming you’re Filipino based on your username, location, and religion? (Not that it makes a difference; I’m just curious.)

I can certainly sympathise with point #3, although more on a career level. My grandma wanted me to be a doctor or engineer or lawyer (Filipino stereotypes, yes…) growing up because that’s where the money is. I told her that I wanted to write for a career and, while reluctant, she eventually came around. I’m still in school bu I feel that I can do the most good as a journalist, especially if I integrate my Catholic virtues into my writing, so as to help facilitate cultural change. I think that if you have good dialogue with your father, perhaps you can present your side as what you feel God is calling you to do. Hard to argue against God, right?

As for point #4, since you’re already that far maybe you could finish your college education and use that year as further discernment? If you discover that you’re not being called to the priesthood then at least you have your degree to get you into your career.

Regardless of whatever you decide on, it never hurts to get as much vocational advice as you can!

 

[PCalungsod]

@Shatterpoint: yes, I am a Filipino. But to clear things up, my username isn’t based on my real name. Got it from one of the seven newly cannonized saints, whose name is Pedro Calungsod, who is also a Filipino.

Yeah, I can feel the struggle of kinda arguing with God. Well I guess only time can tell what will happen to me. In God’s time.

 

[PCalungsod]

As of point#3, it has something to do with the “continuity of the race”. You know, parents always wanted to see grandkids from their children someday.

 

[Shatterpoint]

@Shatterpoint: yes, I am a Filipino. But to clear things up, my username isn’t based on my real name. Got it from one of the seven newly cannonized saints, whose name is Pedro Calungsod, who is also a Filipino.

Yeah, I can feel the struggle of kinda arguing with God. Well I guess only time can tell what will happen to me. In God’s time.

Oh yeah, I know about Calungsod. I’m Filipino myself. One of my mentors had a countdown to his canonisation on his Twitter account.

As of point#3, it has something to do with the “continuity of the race”. You know, parents always wanted to see grandkids from their children someday.

I don’t remember where it was that I read it or heard it from but this is, supposedly, one of the stumbling blocks that prevents more Filipinos from going into vocations (which I found ironic because the Philippines is a Catholic majority).

 

[poptown]

I am in the exact same situation: I seriously consider priesthood as a lifelong mission; I am an only child; my parents need me to support them; my parents don’t like “priesthood” for cultural reasons and their unbelief; and I’m already graduating from college in 1.5 years.

Therefore, please keep us updated. I hope you will have a great and successful journey!

 

[catholicrobot]

Finally! somebody else who is afraid while discerning. I am 16 and discerning what feels like very strong call to be a nun. I have felt the call since like 2nd grade and now am in 11th.

Discerning for some reason reasoning me like no other. I could all of the reasonings but that would take forever. but i can tell you my two biggest fears.

1. I practically have a career in robotics already. I am on 5 competitive teams and I love engineering. At 16, i have gotten 7 job offers before they knew my age. I am really good at it and I love engineering. But if I follow my vocation, I would probably have to leave my robots behind and I wouuldn’t be able to contribute to the world if engineering. It’s like I would be letting the world down.

The second thing is my age. I am 16 now and have felt the call since I was 6. Ive been told by some that I am too young, other have told me I am just blessed. At 16, there isnt much I can do to really discern my vocation… Am I to young to even consider this?