I feel bad for picking bad Godparents

[gumdrop_hearts]

sigh… when my daughter was baptized I picked family because I knew that they where good people but I also knew that they were not strong in the Catholic faith. That makes me feel so guilty. My brother seems to think that religion is used by governments to make people easier to brainwash and control. I’m actually scared to ask him what he thinks of the Catholic church…since he is my kid’s Godfather… I know he feels it is ok to worship God in your own way.

My cousin is her Godmother. She identifies herself as Catholic but doesn’t go to church regularly. I wouldn’t know how much she understands about the faith either. The thing that worries me now is that she is dating a Baptist guy… so I don’t know how that will turn out.

I don’t know what I am looking for here…
I am just trying to express my fears and guilt over not picking strong Catholic Godparents to help me raise my daughter Catholic. I just don’t have any Catholic friends. (I only have one true friend…) My husband has a Godmother we both know and love… I wish I had picked her.

Much after her baptism…we have picked an awesome older couple as our witnesses for marriage. I’m thinking of trying to rekindle my old friendships with their twin daughters… maybe that would be better for my second baby… which I just found out I may be having in 9 mths… I’m just bad at being social and I honest don’t know how I got to be such close friends with Sara. Wow, it has been 10 years strong now as I think about it. She is not Catholic though .

 

[ahollars]

Many parents select Godparents who don’t live up to the job. The fact is that as you age in wisdom and experience, you become more aware of what is needed in the faith. However, some Catholics do not, even those whom we love most in this life.

All I can say is that you shouldn’t feel bad about not asking them again next time. My wife’s family is all Protestant. Obviously, they have never been Godparents to any of our children. Yes, they are offended, and we have told them that they don’t even understand what they are volunteering to do. When pressed about why they even want the title, no answer. I think it is a prestige thing in Protestant minds.

Don’t worry about losing contact. Our relatives got over it soon enough. Life goes on.

 

[RedSparklyShoes]

I think it is a prestige thing in Protestant minds.

Indeed. One of my sister’s Godmothers (Anglican Church) was my mom’s sister (tradition in our family is two of the same gender, one opposite). Totally political move really. My mother’s sister pretty much has no faith.

 

[ffg]

Don’t feel bad.

Life happens. My Godparents are about 6000 miles away, I’ve never known them. Maybe 8000 miles.

We have never picked my wife’s family for any of our 5 kids, but now with this 6th on the way we took her parents. That was the safest, closest to practicing catholic I could go.

They have cafeteria catholic tendencies, but the way I see it, they won’t be dictating any moral course for my kids anyway.

 

[Bklynguy]

Indeed. One of my sister’s Godmothers (Anglican Church) was my mom’s sister (tradition in our family is two of the same gender, one opposite). Totally political move really. My mother’s sister pretty much has no faith.

It is. We ran into the same thing with my Lutheran MIL about picking my wife’s brother. “We should pick him b/c my brother was the Godfather to our first child, and he shouldn’t be left out and we should ‘honor’ him b/c he helped my wife out during her pregnancy.” Having said that, MIL never even goes to her own Lutheran church, so why this was even a big deal is beyond me.

We initially were not going to, but then did (as a Christian witness), mainly to keep peace in the family. This was all, of course, under consultation with my pastor. Even so, I now regret that decision. The upside is that he won’t be getting the kids if something happens to my wife and I anyway. That will be my parents, who are both Catholic and raised me and my brother Catholic. So maybe it doesn’t make a big difference either way (but it still bugs me).