I have a bad temper when playing games/sports. Anyone else?

  • Thread starter Thread starter AltarSoldier
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
A

AltarSoldier

Guest
I just wanted to vent and get this off my chest because I do NOT feel good after getting angry at my teammates after a rather agitating game that could have easily been won. I have a crucifix just to my left and a statue of Mary and I still couldnt control myself. i remember taking a break from games for like 2 months and boy it was sooo therapeutic and positive. I dont know why I cannot bring myself to do it again. Talk about sports and games being a drug haha 😅

Does anyone else tend to get mad or very upset when playing games or sports? At what point is it purely considered a sin? Does it start when you’re berating your teammates and using foul language? Or can it be as simple as crying out in frustration at a bad call or clenching your fist?
 
Last edited:
I started getting upset while playing NASCAR Heat today. We’re in the same boat. I’ve brought my swearing to a minimum, but I might be a better person when I’m taking breaks from gaming.
 
Depends on which sports, the only sport I have ever been good at is soccer, so because I know I’m good at it, yes I get angry when I play badly. Tennis, which I was taught to play in college, I’m terrible at, I expect to play badly. Now with games, I don’t know if you’re referring to video games or board games, but I don’t think I’ve ever finished a game of Monopoly.
 
Last edited:
Since Im a younger fellow video games but absolutely can be referred to any type of game.
 
Oh, you need to stop that then. It’s just a waste of energy, and I bet it doesn’t really make you feel better.

Life is just too short to waste being angry.

It’s just a game.
 
Its funny you mention that because I sometimes use the saying to people that get very annoyed and rage at games “you wont care about this match 10 minutes from now”. Im pretty bad at taking my own advise from there. Probably a male ego thing but when you’re in a team of 5 and the other team has 4 because one player disconnects and you STILL lose your competitive side mutates :crazy_face:
 
It’s okay to be competitive. It’s not okay to be a sore loser. It’s just a game. 😉
 
Almost everything we do in life is competitive it is our capitalistic nature to win at all cost. When it comes to all types of games we often get carried away with the win at all cost attitude

Unless sport & or board games pay for your livelihood and puts food on your table then it is meant for FUN and getting angry is not fun for you or any other.
 
Last edited:
I think that what Adam said might be helpful: it’s a matter of your expectations. It might be that you are holding everyone including yourself to too high a standard.
 
I know someone who gets upset every time they play video games. I ask them why they play if it makes them upset. Never got a good answer.

Life is to short and precious to willingly do things that make us upset. It’s difficult enough to come to that conclusion when you’re young, but to put it into practice takes real discipline even as an adult. Look at how many addicts there are. (Not saying you’re a game addict) They don’t want to be addicts, and they know what they do is hurting them, but they can’t stop.

I think what you are describing could be put in the same family of behaviors as an addiction. That is to say, we do something that we know is hurting us but we cannot seem to stop. There is some sort of blind spot or barrier that keeps us from realizing that peace lies on the other side.
 
Last edited:
If playing sports with anger is an occasion of sin, do not play sports or games. When you get your temper under control, then, try them again.
 
Your relationship with your team mates is more important than if you win or lose.

10 years from now when you look back at this time being together, when you’ve gone separate ways, you should be remembering your friendship and how much fun it was to be together. That’s really the prize at the end of the day. Treasure each other because before you know it, life moves on.
 
Hi, was passing by and thought I’d reply. That moment when you start to think vengeful and hostile thoughts and start to base self esteem on whether there is a win or not is when the Holy Spirit needs to be quickly consulted.
This came to me, there are seven deadly sins, there are seven gifts of the Holy Spirit. So the Holy Spirit (He testifies of Christ (must be the antidote) to various sins such as anger. Seek forgiveness and definitely forgive yourself, too. Maybe you could take a 21 day break from competitive pursuits, find a good spiritual director/confessor and work with them for a short time.
Blessings to you.
 
The minority of people who play sports yet can’t or won’t practice good sportsmanship is a pet peeve of mine. Maybe they get too caught up in the passion of the moment, or perhaps they simply aren’t good at controlling their emotions, I don’t know.

One activity that I really, really hate to lose at is chess, so much so that I sometimes avoid it because of the intensity of the feelings it engenders.
 
Last edited:
a bad temper, is often directed at others, whether it be in sports, at work, at home, etc. personally i think it has more to do with being angry about a situation, most often in the past, in our lives that we
haven’t addressed or tried to bury it inside ourselves. of course as
time goes by it has a snow ball effect and often taken out on people
who haven’t done anything to us to warrant a temper-tantrum.
it takes some inner work and healing and praying. often a counselor can help, writing in a journal everytime there’s a blow up.
what precipitated it then trying to discover the similarities to something that happened in our past. it’s definitely work and not
fun but getting at the root and then forgiving that person who wronged us is quite worth doing as we slowly see the tantrums
disappear, and our relationships improving. and of course, praying
then also knowing our Lord wants to help us solve the problem to
love. if we don’t love ourselves it’s pretty hard to love others.
hope this helps…
 
AltarSoldier said:
I just wanted to vent and get this off my chest because I do NOT feel good after getting angry at my teammates after a rather agitating game that could have easily been won. I have a crucifix just to my left and a statue of Mary and I still couldnt control myself. i remember taking a break from games for like 2 months and boy it was sooo therapeutic and positive. I dont know why I cannot bring myself to do it again. Talk about sports and games being a drug haha 😅

Does anyone else tend to get mad or very upset when playing games or sports? At what point is it purely considered a sin? Does it start when you’re berating your teammates and using foul language? Or can it be as simple as crying out in frustration at a bad call or clenching your fist?
Click to expand...
It isn’t that you’ve made the game too important. It is that you have made other people too unimportant. You need to up your game when it comes to showing respect for the people Our Lord died to save. Your ultimate goal, after all, is that both you and each of them–your opponents, the officials, and those very loud and perhaps ignorant people in the stands–will be made fit to spend eternity together in a manner befitting your participation in the Beatific Vision.

In other words, your participation in sports cannot give glory God unless you act with love of neighbor when you do it: patient, kind, never rude, and all the rest. If you let go of glorifying God and the two great Commandments, all you’re really doing with a win is trying to glorify yourself. It is better to win a little less often but to play a game that gives glory to God every single time. Once you have minded that, go ahead and play your best and as hard as you can. I think you’ll be a good sport no matter how the score turns out, even if you are more exultant on the days when you yourself win.

I’d use the problems you’re citing as symptoms of a heart that has slipped out of the right place. That great desire you have to win is like a furnace that lights up all the cracks in your charity, but you can use it as a way to proof yourself, too. When you have gotten to the point that you keep the value of other persons in your heart even when you are straining your body and mind to the utmost, you’ll have evidence that you have won something that will last that you wouldn’t have if you just gave up sports. You won’t be worried about whether or not you clench your fist when you’re trying hard, excepting whether that shows you’ve allowed an unprofitable focus on a mistake to cause you to lose your focus on winning (but that is another matter!)
 
Last edited:
srobi said:
a bad temper, is often directed at others, whether it be in sports, at work, at home, etc. personally i think it has more to do with being angry about a situation, most often in the past, in our lives that we
haven’t addressed or tried to bury it inside ourselves…
Click to expand...
I like the insight that anger is an emotional expression of a violated expectation. It is like a dashboard light–it carries information about our sense of the state of things. It is worthwhile, when we get angry, to ask what it was we expected and how we think we ought to address that violated expectation.

Sometimes, the answer is that our expectations were unrealistic. In that case, we need to get a grip, re-set our expectations, and get over it. Sometimes, the expectation is fine, but our loss of self-control is not the way to address the situation. In that case, we need to choose a response that is better than our automatic reaction was. For instance, if a teammate makes a mistake that we ought to have expected he might make, we ought to have practiced a response that will help the team win the game and get better overall. Just screaming at him is unlikely to be the best choice! Sometimes, though, when we know why we are angry and what authority we have to address the violated expectation, we might respond with something like Our Lord’s cleansing of the Temple. Not every angry outburst is a sin, after all. Most of the time, though, we don’t get angry about the things we should and do get angry about things that we shouldn’t have expected to be different than they are.
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top