I have a dilemma - Do I take this job or not?

[yessisan]

Yessi, try not to think that it’s good that Julian isn’t here because of these problems. You miscarried Julian because God wanted him home with Him and for no other reason. Not because of the kind of the mother your relatives tell you would have been or any of the other insane things they come up with. Not because of your problems with your marriage or because of your financial situation. God blessed you with him because of the wonderful mom you are and because he knew you’d be perfect for Julian because you’d love him with all your heart in the short time he’d be with you. :hug1: :hug1: :hug1:

:crying:

 

[Liberanosamalo]

As a mother… I would advise you to let your mom help you. Moms can read their children. She knows you are hurting about something. She is doing whatever she can to help.

And good choice on the externship. A month goes very quickly. At the end of the month, would you be sorry you took it? No. If you didn’t take it, would you wish you had? Probably.

Regret is hard to bear. Do what will help you get new contacts and a better job.

Then pay mom back with interest.

Sell the house and downscale, even if it means renting an apartment somewhere.

Good luck with the externship.

 

[dixieagle]

That’s why I’m having such a hard time. One can get me on my feet right away and the other will just take 1 more month and would be better for me. My husband is giving me all his income so I can pay for the bills and the food I eat (he
s living with his best friend right now). My mom already offered to lend me money but I declined (and she doesn’t know about what happened w/my husband yet). Maybe I can survive it one more month? I don’t know… I’m seriously going nuts. My conscience is having a tug of war. One side says take the job and make some money now; the other side says do the externship so I can get the better job in 1 month.

OK…take a deep breath. First, you must pay attention to your mortgage; nothing will ruin your credit faster than defaulting. Your credit score drops like a rock, as your mortgage is regarded as your most important bill; if you are not paying that, then the credit bureaus figure you are really in trouble.

Can you use your credit card to get enough cash to pay the mortgage this month? Not a good solution, but better than having two months of black marks against your name. It could buy you time. It would also mean that you could do the externship, which seems like a necessity, to me; short-term hardship for long-term gain. I would also consider your mom’s loan; you must not go into foreclosure, if at all possible (government help may be on the way in the form of legislation, but who knows how long that will take?)

I would recommend selling the house, but with the value having dropped so much, and in a bad market, that’s not feasible. Could you rent it out, and live in the manufactured home (if you stay together?)

I’ll say prayers that you get everything sorted out.

 

[puzzleannie]

just some thoughts for OP
revisit the decision-making process that led to current school and work commitments, what was the goal behind those decisions. If that goal still holds
ie, prepare for a career as a vet, get schooling to qualify for that career, focus on completing requirements including internships or externships and fulfilling requisites like licensing exams, try to get work experience in that field or related area.

If that was the goal, subsequent decisions relating to school, work etc. should be made in light of the conditions that framed the original decisions and commitment. So if the goal remains being a vet, for example, the job decision should be part of the plan to reach that goal, and not get sidetracked by other issues, including income. In relation to the loan burden and cost of education already paid and that still owing, the rise in salary for a job unrelated to the career goal will not cover the loss of abandoning the plan.

the only reason for going off-track from the plan in a new job decision, would be if family circumstances and changed drastically, and in that case the decision to in effect abandon or postpone the original plan must take into account the real cost of doing so.

 

[yessisan]

just some thoughts for OP
revisit the decision-making process that led to current school and work commitments, what was the goal behind those decisions. If that goal still holds
ie, prepare for a career as a vet, get schooling to qualify for that career, focus on completing requirements including internships or externships and fulfilling requisites like licensing exams, try to get work experience in that field or related area.

If that was the goal, subsequent decisions relating to school, work etc. should be made in light of the conditions that framed the original decisions and commitment. So if the goal remains being a vet, for example, the job decision should be part of the plan to reach that goal, and not get sidetracked by other issues, including income. In relation to the loan burden and cost of education already paid and that still owing, the rise in salary for a job unrelated to the career goal will not cover the loss of abandoning the plan.

the only reason for going off-track from the plan in a new job decision, would be if family circumstances and changed drastically, and in that case the decision to in effect abandon or postpone the original plan must take into account the real cost of doing so.

Well, what led to the school was wanting to get out of my job and to be able to work at this certain hospital. The school requires an externship and in this externship, I’ll be getting hands-on training for what I am studying. So my goal was exactly this. I know the other job would just sidetrack me and probably ruin my chances of finishing this school program. I only have 180 days to complete it after classes are done (we finish on 3/10, so I have until September 10 to complete the externship). If I go the job, I wouldn’t be able to do this, which is why I think the externship, in spite of not making any money is the best choice (thanks to all the thinking I did today, especially because of this thread).

2 things that did happen were that incident with my husband and having lost our baby 2 months ago. The baby thing made me realize I shouldn’t let people take advantage of me so I quit my very stressful job. Then the husband incident occurred but I’m still on my feet. If I get the job, I can get my own money, but if I do the externship, I can finish my school’s requirements and get a higher pay with very good benefits. But I’m not going to let my husband ruin my schooling and training. It’s actually better this way since I can study more and have more time to dedicate to my homework. And I was pretty behing in all the work that I have to turn in by 3/10.

Thank you all for your words. It looks like I did make the right decision about the externship.

 

[1ke]

Take the externship, get a night/weekend job, and call 888-995-HOPE about your mortgage situation. Sounds like you might be qualified for a loan modification under the Paulson Plan depending when you took out your loan and when it resets, you might also look into a forebearance, or since it sounds like entirely too much house for you to afford you could discuss how to get out of the house without foreclosure-- such as a short sale or deed-in-lieu of foreclosure.

 

[yessisan]

Take the externship, get a night/weekend job, and call 888-995-HOPE about your mortgage situation. Sounds like you might be qualified for a loan modification under the Paulson Plan depending when you took out your loan and when it resets, you might also look into a forebearance, or since it sounds like entirely too much house for you to afford you could discuss how to get out of the house without foreclosure-- such as a short sale or deed-in-lieu of foreclosure.

Thanks for that. I might as well give them a call and see what they say.

 

[Sina]

I’m with pretty much everyone else - take the hospital externship first.

Praying for you Yessi.