I need help

[Rau]

All due respect back to you, none of what you posted is contrary to anything I posted. Just because I may have not mentioned help other than sacramental grace doesn’t mean I believe that is all that is needed. All of our struggles are part of temporal punishment and part of our cleansing. You may not agree with this, but Mother Church does.

I posted my response because I was compelled to offer my experiences with these issues and also my help as a minister, not to draw debate. I’ll go back to the normal forums where I normally post. Thanks have a nice day.

Well Deacon, I think to post on a forum like this but with an intention that it’s a one way deal (ie. no one will engage / debate with you) is a little unrealistic.

 

[Lapey]

Well Deacon, I think to post on a forum like this but with an intention that it’s a one way deal (ie. no one will engage / debate with you) is a little unrealistic.

It appeared to be a thread asking for advice, not a debate. That is all. If my adding to that is unrealistic, then my apologies…

BTW, look at the title of the thread…“I need help” yep, looks like a request for advice.

 

[Lapey]

I apologize; I tend to run a little hot and come across too strong. Think I will go back to lurking

Accepted. No need to just lurk, I tend to come off too strong at times as well. I think its a man thing.

 

[Antecedent]

This is going to sound somewhat counter-intuitive, but I believe it may help. Instead of trying to repress your urges, try to focus them - on your wife. Unlike addictions to alcohol, drugs, etc., sexuality is a normal, healthy urge. You have gotten into the habit of misusing it. A lot of good spiritual advice in this thread already and I do not disagree with any of it. Sacraments, prayer, diversions, etc. are all good. But sometimes fighting sexual temptation feels like damming a river. Instead of damming up the river, direct the energy toward your wife. When tempted, think about the next lovemaking session with her. Plan it. Plan to romance her. Notice how much better being with your wife is when you have been pure yourself. Become addicted to loving her to help get yourself redirected to a more healthy sexual place.

Its like any challenge - if all you focus on is the negative and how hard it is, you will fail. But if you focus on the reward of being pure - you will develop a new habit in its place.

 

[mh0701]

I had to step away from this post for a bit. Probably just because I was disgusted with myself, maybe I didn’t want the reminder of my sin, I’m not sure. But anyway, for this I apologize.

I appreciate all the advice. It’s a good reminder that this is a process,and not something that can change overnight. There are many ways to commit sexual sin, of course, and I am proud to say that I conquered almost all of them already, with zero desire to go back. There’s just a couple left that I face temptation with, and with God’s grace I can beat them too. Hopefully sooner than later!

Thanks again, and God Bless!

 

[jimmybeth]

Please contact SA.org Not only will you find help but you will find a way to live your Catholic faith.