I really want to tell a girl I like her but

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chuckbobb

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so…
I asked this question awhile ago but…love I just cant get my mind off of telling this girl I like her… I see her at least twice a week. so I just cannot forget that she exists :banghead::love: yeah
all of the advice I got said to wait. And I guess my hormones say TELL HER!!!
do I try and suppress my desires?

also I do suffer form lust aka I look at porn I feel like I am in a pit that whenever I try and get out I sink deeper I just don’t know what to do. I know that this habit will kill my future marriage God willing. any help would be greatly appreciated.

P.S
I am friends with her younger brother.
Jason Evert says the only way to overcome pornography is with prayer and to love pornstars I just don’t know how to do that (love pornstars:shrug:) and I feel like I have eternal dryness of prayer (meaning I don’t seem to hear God at all) It may be that I don’t know God’s voice I have asked many people how they know that God is speaking to them. but they all say it is almost always different for each individual. and some say that they couldn’t hear him till they were around thirty! I picture myself as a pretty patient guy but… I’m only fifteen!!!

P.P.S
how does one cope with people criticizing a virtue that you are working on (e.g. working on self-control and father says you have no self-control and then after you finish crying, the next day someone says the same thing)

Thank you so much for any answers!
God bless :blessyou:
Chuckbobb
 
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Are you in school? Many schools have counseling services available. You may not wish to discuss everything, but at least you could address the issues with criticism; I’m sure it doesn’t help you to overcome your other problems.

By “love pornstars” it means to acknowledge them as people, not just tools for your use. All those actors are someone’s child. More importantly, they are all children of God and so have the same inherent worth as you. By not using porn, that is loving them.
 
I have only one questionL Do you recite and meditate the Holy Rosary everyday? That’s the surest way to combat porn,not to mention Mass and confession.
 
Pensmama is right. Pornography dismisses the “human” and makes people into objects. So to start to love them, think of them as someone’s child, sister, a unique human being needing to be loved and probably pursuing this line of work because of feeling an acute lack of love. That may help to loosen the desire to look at them, but you also may need some professional help with this. Perhaps you could speak to your priest about it.

I don’t think you should get involved with girls too much at your age and with a pornography problem. You need to take care of that problem first, or it can severely affect the way you view and treat women in the future.
 
There is no easy way to overcome porn. The imagery and sensations involved are addicting…

Further, it is often sought as a distraction from some other pressing issues. It feels good, especially because something else is causing you distress. Speaking with a counselor at your school might be a good start to help figure out what might be bothering you.

I would also recommend working on building up male friendships or friendships in general, before pursuing women on a romantic level. Knowing that you have friends to fall back on can make the fear of rejection more manageable. Join clubs, get involved. Expose yourself to others, and gain from their perspective. Joining a study group, for instance, could help you stay organized with your homework. Staying organized in one area of your life can spill over and help build self confidence and control in other areas.
 
I am homeschooled and as you might imagine I don’t exactly want to tell my parents…
I do go to daily Mass every now and again but she goes as well so I often get distracted.

I do not pray the Rosary often… I should do that…

Thank you again
God bless
Chuckbobb
 
also I don’t really trust anyone
I know I should but it seems that any time I trust someone they let me down
I know they are human and all but
I just have a really hard time trusting I don’t know how to overcome this but none
seems to be trustworthy…

-Chuckbobb
 
🙂

Pray for 10minutes minimum each day,
Forbid yourself from listening to music, watching films, reading books, to do with anything that has any mild scenes against chastity

Replace this sin with good social outings to grandparents, music choir group, anything, with hobbies learning an instrument, sport, anything good,

Develop a sense of positivity, because people often sin because of a root cause, something negative may be triggering that sin
 
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