I took the Eucharist in a Catholic Church and I'm not even a Catholic. What do I do now?

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About 2-3 years ago I began studying Catholicism on my own (outside of RCIA). Very early on I learned about how the Catholic Church has a closed communion. I was attending Mass frequently but staying in the pew during Communion.

Then one day, I decided to approach the Eucharist anyway out of curiosity KNOWING FULL WELL that it’s mortally sinful to partake when not properly disposed (in this case: not even being Catholic). I felt guilty almost immediately and have never again since approached for communion.

Fast forward to today: I’m now in RCIA and am intending to be baptized, confirmed, and received into the Catholic Church at Easter. I’m incredibly concerned about what I did 2-3 years ago, though!

I understand that that particular sin as well as all my other sins will be washed away when I’m baptized, but that’s still a few months away. Furthermore, I think desecration of the Eucharist (which is sort of what I technically did) is probably one of the worst sins anyone could ever commit. I’ve asked if I could have my baptism expedited as to ease my conscience, but my priest told me no. I asked if I as an unbaptized person could go to confession for this, and he said no, absolution can only be given to a baptized Christian.

So what do I do? What if I were to die tomorrow? Would baptism of desire cover this most egregious sin?

Could I make an attempt at an Act of Perfect Contrition, or does that (like confession) only count for baptized people?
 
Jamayla said:
About 2-3 years ago I began studying Catholicism on my own (outside of RCIA). Very early on I learned about how the Catholic Church has a closed communion. I was attending Mass frequently but staying in the pew during Communion.

Then one day, I decided to approach the Eucharist anyway out of curiosity KNOWING FULL WELL that it’s mortally sinful to partake when not properly disposed (in this case: not even being Catholic). I felt guilty almost immediately and have never again since approached for communion.

Fast forward to today: I’m now in RCIA and am intending to be baptized, confirmed, and received into the Catholic Church at Easter. I’m incredibly concerned about what I did 2-3 years ago, though!

I understand that that particular sin as well as all my other sins will be washed away when I’m baptized, but that’s still a few months away. Furthermore, I think desecration of the Eucharist (which is sort of what I technically did) is probably one of the worst sins anyone could ever commit. I’ve asked if I could have my baptism expedited as to ease my conscience, but my priest told me no. I asked if I as an unbaptized person could go to confession for this, and he said no, absolution can only be given to a baptized Christian.

So what do I do? What if I were to die tomorrow? Would baptism of desire cover this most egregious sin?

Could I make an attempt at an Act of Perfect Contrition, or does that (like confession) only count for baptized people?
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Welcome to the forums.

Take a breath. God knows both what was in your heart when you took Communion and what is in your heart now. He is not a God of “black and white” but a God of Justice and Mercy. Make your act of contrition before the Blessed Sacrament, talk to your Priest about it and then give this cross over to Him and do not let it trouble you.

Welcome home and bod Bless you for your zeal for wanting to make amends.
 
Jamayla said:
About 2-3 years ago I began studying Catholicism on my own (outside of RCIA). Very early on I learned about how the Catholic Church has a closed communion. I was attending Mass frequently but staying in the pew during Communion.

Then one day, I decided to approach the Eucharist anyway out of curiosity KNOWING FULL WELL that it’s mortally sinful to partake when not properly disposed (in this case: not even being Catholic). I felt guilty almost immediately and have never again since approached for communion.

Fast forward to today: I’m now in RCIA and am intending to be baptized, confirmed, and received into the Catholic Church at Easter. I’m incredibly concerned about what I did 2-3 years ago, though!

I understand that that particular sin as well as all my other sins will be washed away when I’m baptized, but that’s still a few months away. Furthermore, I think desecration of the Eucharist (which is sort of what I technically did) is probably one of the worst sins anyone could ever commit. I’ve asked if I could have my baptism expedited as to ease my conscience, but my priest told me no. I asked if I as an unbaptized person could go to confession for this, and he said no, absolution can only be given to a baptized Christian.

So what do I do? What if I were to die tomorrow? Would baptism of desire cover this most egregious sin?

Could I make an attempt at an Act of Perfect Contrition, or does that (like confession) only count for baptized people?
Click to expand...
Calm down. Trust in the grace of baptism to wash away all of your prior sins. You can make an Act of Contrition, but you should also know that the Church teaches that there is a Baptism of desire- 1259 For catechumens who die before their Baptism, their explicit desire to receive it, together with repentance for their sins, and charity, assures them the salvation that they were not able to receive through the sacrament.

Welcome home.
 
Welcome, Jamalaya. I agree with the first two responses. Do not be troubled by this. The Lord knows your conscience and your heart. He is a God of mercy. Be at peace and focus with joy and anticipation on your preparation to receive the sacraments as you complete your RCIA instruction. God bless you on your journey!
 
You know that your Baptism will wash away any sins you have committed in the past .

If this episode is really worrying you - and you are now really regretting it , then ask the priest if you can just sit with him and get it off your chest - explain to him that it’s eating you up at present .

If he says yes - then take a small card with a picture of Christ on it with you - look at it Him ] and then pour it all out to Him - how you know you did wrong and you really regret it .

He Who made you will hear you , and your priest , though he can’t absolve you, will talk to you about this and reassure you that it’s all over . You are not confessing to the Priest - in this case you are looking at the image of Christ and telling Him that you are sorry .

This may help you - I hope it does
 
As everyone else has intimated–you’re being way too hard on yourself. Do you know the God you worship? Isn’t He full of love and mercy and goodness and grace? Think of Jesus, and love yourself as He loves you. You did something you shouldn’t have. What were your motives in receiving Him in Holy Communion? Was it vain curiosity or a desire to be one with Him? You disobeyed Church teaching, yes. But what do you think Jesus would say if He were face to face with you and you told Him you went to receive Him because you love Him and want to be intimate with Him? Though Christ wants us to obey the Church’s teaching, above all He cares about what is in Your heart. You are sorry for having gone against Church teaching. Be good to yourself as God has been good to you! How he feels about you and all of your efforts cannot be expressed better than Christ crucified for you!

One final note . . . If only all of us in the Catholic Church desired Him–longed for Him as much as you seem to have desired and longed for Him! Be at peace, and welcome home!
 
As your are preparing to be received into the Catholic Church, you may have covered the nature of sin already. You thus may have learned that we make a distinct between sinning knowingly and unknowingly.

Again, as others have said, don’t be too hard on yourself. You simply didn’t understand, and you could perhaps consider confessing as part of your final preparation for sacramental reception into the Church.

Peace be with you, and may you be blessed abudantly as your journey in faith with the Lord!
 
Welcome to CAF! 👋

Baptism is powerful. There is no sin (not even this one) that it will not wash away from your soul forever.

Listen to your priest. He knows you and has asked you to wait. I understand that it is easier said than done, but you can be at peace in the knowledge that you are being obedient. You made your request and the priest gave you an answer. Use this time wisely as a time of prayer and preparation.

It seems evident that you are sincerely sorry for this sin, and you are currently seeking to come into the Church as soon as you possibly can. God knows all this. He’s not out to send you to hell on a technicality. Baptism of Desire applies to just these types of scenarios. If it didn’t, what else would it apply to?
 
God knows what was in your heart at the time when you received Holy Commuion. Talk to an understanding Priest that can help you and be full of Joy at your entrance into the Catholic Church. God bless you.
 
Jamayla said:
So what do I do? What if I were to die tomorrow? Would baptism of desire cover this most egregious sin?

Could I make an attempt at an Act of Perfect Contrition, or does that (like confession) only count for baptized people?
Click to expand...
First, this isn’t the MOST egregious sin out there… as far as “defiling” the Eucharist goes, there are a LOT of worse things you could have done.

Second, baptism of desire is a powerful thing… so foster your desire and hunger for the faith as you pass through RCIA.

Second, an Act of Perfect Contrition relies on the fact that God can render grace to whomever He pleases, outside of the sacraments themselves… so yes, that is ALSO a good bet for you (to offer an act of perfect contrition as needed) until such time as you can get baptised!
 
Jamayla said:
About 2-
Fast forward to today: I’m now in RCIA and am intending to be baptized, confirmed, and received into the Catholic Church at Easter. I’m incredibly concerned about what I did 2-3 years ago, though!

I
So what do I do? What if I were to die tomorrow? Would baptism of desire cover this most egregious sin?

?
Click to expand...
yes if you are now a catechumen and, heaven forbid, died before Easter you would be considered to have desired baptism and therefore beconsidered to have been freed from all sin if you persisted in that desire even in death. yes this (if it even was a sin) will be washed away in baptism. Don’t fret about it. In any case it was not descecration of the Eucharist as you properly consumed the blessed sacrament. It was simply receiving illicitly but it is most probable you did not have full knowledge to commit sin at that time. but these are exactly the types of question you should be bringing to the priest during this time of preparation

welcome home, will look for you at the Vigil.
 
Now…pray and tell Jesus you are sorry…repent (you already have).

Believe and trust in Jesus Christ and desire Baptism …

Then:

Baptism!

And you will be a new creation.
 
Welcome! :hug1:
You got a lot of good advice here. I would just like to add that your respect for the Holy Eucharist is admirable- there are cradle Catholics out there who don’t have your discernment. Glad to have you!
 
Being that you are not yet a baptized Catholic you are not obligated and are not morally culpable for what the Catholic Church teaches. Once you are baptized then you are in full communion with authoritative teachings and must abide by them. It is quite impressive that you question whether or not you are in mortal sin. First of all you still have original sin until you are baptized. So do not concern yourself with anything other than your intention to become Catholic and leave the rest up to God. He loves you more than you could ever imagine, And, as was mentioned by others here, wouldn’t it be awesome if baptized Catholics recognized where they are with God when they go up and receive Him? You are doing great and keep up the good work. God bless you…teachccd 🙂
 
teachccd said:
Being that you are not yet a baptized Catholic you are not obligated and are not morally culpable for what the Catholic Church teaches. Once you are baptized then you are in full communion with authoritative teachings and must abide by them.
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The rest of your post is accurate, but this first part is not. People outside the catholic church do not get a magical pass on all sin simply because they are not “part of the church” and therefore not “obligated” by her teachings.

The catholic church is the UNIVERSAL church… ALL people are called to be members and are bound by her teachings. If someone is UNAWARE of her teachings, then they might lack the knowledge required for it to be mortal sin. However, relying on invincible ignorance rather than sacramental grace is a risky proposition at best.

There is no such thing as a moral state which is “safer” than being inside the church, so there is no sense in saying that it is better to be non-catholic or that non-catholics are not bound by the church’s moral laws.
 
Jamayla said:
About 2-3 years ago I began studying Catholicism on my own (outside of RCIA). Very early on I learned about how the Catholic Church has a closed communion. I was attending Mass frequently but staying in the pew during Communion.

Then one day, I decided to approach the Eucharist anyway out of curiosity KNOWING FULL WELL that it’s mortally sinful to partake when not properly disposed (in this case: not even being Catholic). I felt guilty almost immediately and have never again since approached for communion.

Fast forward to today: I’m now in RCIA and am intending to be baptized, confirmed, and received into the Catholic Church at Easter. I’m incredibly concerned about what I did 2-3 years ago, though!

I understand that that particular sin as well as all my other sins will be washed away when I’m baptized, but that’s still a few months away. Furthermore, I think desecration of the Eucharist (which is sort of what I technically did) is probably one of the worst sins anyone could ever commit. I’ve asked if I could have my baptism expedited as to ease my conscience, but my priest told me no. I asked if I as an unbaptized person could go to confession for this, and he said no, absolution can only be given to a baptized Christian.

So what do I do? What if I were to die tomorrow? Would baptism of desire cover this most egregious sin?

Could I make an attempt at an Act of Perfect Contrition, or does that (like confession) only count for baptized people?
Click to expand...
If you are sorry for your sins, whatever they are, God forgives you. An Act of Contrition is a prayer and it is good to think the thoughts of that prayer formula, but just saying the words doesn’t do anything magical to your soul. If the ideas of that prayer are in you and saying the prayer echoes what is sincerely in you then you are forgiven.

Jesus says a man who lusts in his heart is already guilty of the sin without ever committing the act. The same thing is true of finding God’s mercy. God never rejects a penitent soul. He can not. The job of the confessor is to determine whether or not you are sorry for your sins. Some people know they have done things they shouldn’t, but are not penitent. They are still in the sin even though they know it is wrong, so they confess.

From what you have written you are sorry for whatever sin you may have comitted. That is what matters. If you can not confess now or be baptized yet that is not your fault. Trust in God’s mercy. Know that God loves you and will not abandon you who are sorry for your sins. Listen to Jesus when He says be not afraid. Stop being afraid.
 
grandfather said:
If you are sorry for your sins, whatever they are, God forgives you. An Act of Contrition is a prayer and it is good to think the thoughts of that prayer formula, but just saying the words doesn’t do anything magical to your soul. If the ideas of that prayer are in you and saying the prayer echoes what is sincerely in you then you are forgiven.

Jesus says a man who lusts in his heart is already guilty of the sin without ever committing the act. The same thing is true of finding God’s mercy. God never rejects a penitent soul. He can not. The job of the confessor is to determine whether or not you are sorry for your sins. Some people know they have done things they shouldn’t, but are not penitent. They are still in the sin even though they know it is wrong, so they confess.

From what you have written you are sorry for whatever sin you may have comitted. That is what matters. If you can not confess now or be baptized yet that is not your fault. Trust in God’s mercy. Know that God loves you and will not abandon you who are sorry for your sins. Listen to Jesus when He says be not afraid. Stop being afraid.
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You must be called “grandfather” because of the wisdom and kindness with which you speak. Beautifully said!🙂
 
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