If I can't have children, can I still get married?

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AuraLu

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I’m awaiting test results that may indicicate that I can’t have children. If this is the case, should I not marry?
 
Infertility is not an impediment to marriage. Being unable to have sex is.
 
ShrodingersCat said:
Infertility is not an impediment to marriage. Being unable to have sex is.
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Right.

It would be wise to disclose this, if it does happen to be the case, prior to marriage, though. (Not on the first date!)

Praying for a good result for you. 👍
 
AuraLu said:
I’m awaiting test results that may indicicate that I can’t have children. If this is the case, should I not marry?
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You can still get married. You must be able to consummate the marriage though. I think you’d be obliged to tell your future husband this information though, before any marriage took place.
I’m sure it would be difficult to be told you can’t have children, however adoption is always a possibility.

There’s also the possibility that if you pray for a miracle, you might get one.
 
I understand pre-existing impotence being an impediment to marriage. However, the Church also does allow to marry validly older couples - sometimes in their 70’s, often a widow and widower who have lost their prior spouses, and this raises a question about the requirement for consummation at that kind of advanced age.
 
Tarpeian_Rock said:
I understand pre-existing impotence being an impediment to marriage. However, the Church also does allow to marry validly older couples - sometimes in their 70’s, often a widow and widower who have lost their prior spouses, and this raises a question about the requirement for consummation at that kind of advanced age.
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It’s not “pre-existing impotence” that’s the impediment. It’s antecedent and perpetual impotence – and, in addition, there’s an important caveat: if there’s any doubt about the assertion that they’d never, ever, ever (even once!) be able to have sex, then canon law asserts that the marriage must not be impeded. This, I think, is what resolves the issue you’ve raised…
 
Your fine. Get married! If you adopt, or foster, you will get additional graces.
 
I’m sure you can get married. A word of note; those tests can be wrong. My mom and dad were both told they could never have kids. They had four together. (My youngest siblings have a different father)
 
It can also depend on what you mean by “I can’t have children”. Infertility isn’t an impediment to marriage, so don’t worry about it if that is the case! If the results you are waiting on are related to genetic counseling, and “I can’t have children” means you physically can get pregnant but don’t want to take a chance that your children will have whatever genetic issue that has been discovered through tests, then I would talk with a priest about your specific situation.
 
Tarpeian_Rock said:
I understand pre-existing impotence being an impediment to marriage. However, the Church also does allow to marry validly older couples - sometimes in their 70’s, often a widow and widower who have lost their prior spouses, and this raises a question about the requirement for consummation at that kind of advanced age.
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OT but … A lot of older people continue to be sexually active and certainly sexually capable. One survey showed that 34% of people in their 70s were enjoying sex weekly!

But more directly to your point, consummation isn’t a requirement to validity. Failure to consummate leaves a marriage dissolvable, not invalid.
 
May the results of your testing be positive for you. May god grant you the desire of your heart in some manner.

Mary.
 
esieffe said:
Your fine. Get married! If you adopt, or foster, you will get additional graces.
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^^^This. Also, be aware that God has been known to have, shall we say, a sense of humor where supposedly infertile couples are concerned.
 
many women are told they can’t have children and end up with a miracle baby, if its God’s will - he can make miracles happen.
 
AuraLu said:
I’m awaiting test results that may indicicate that I can’t have children. If this is the case, should I not marry?
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Sending a couple of Hail Marys your way. The answer depends on what that is about, and I’m certainly not asking, just giving you multiple scenarios:

– infertility: not a problem
– inability to have sexual intercourse: can’t marry, no interpretation needed, people have already quoted the relevant canon law
– ability to have sexual intercourse but need to rely on contraception to prevent any possibility of pregnancy because pregnancy could be disastrous to health: pains me to say, but also can’t marry

Longer version: marriage requires some essential elements in order to be valid. Excluding any of them makes marriage invalid (i.e. nonexistent). Excluding openness to procreation — which includes openness to pregnancy — would prevent marriage, even if the reason were totally blameless and understandable. That would be similar to the situation of homosexuals: not at fault for feeling the way they do but not free to go ahead and marry someone of the sex they want. Or someone already married but abandoned: not at fault for inadvertently falling in love but still not free to go ahead and date etc.
 
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