If you're not called

[3Sanctus]

Sorry if this is repetitive on this thread as I just scanned it over a bit, but thought this might be useful.

Think about how much a mother loves her children. A mother would gladly endure all sorts of hardships just to see her child smile, would gladly endure death to save her child - to give that child a better chance of surviving and being happy. If that’s what such a frail mortal is capable of feeling for her child, imagine just how much our infinitely loving Lord loves that little child (or grown child).

The fact God chooses to allow a mother to be the primary caretaker (not to overlook the role of fathers, but I think most people would agree the role of the mother has a certain uniqueness to it that is a little more “heart-to-heart,” at least as far as sons are concerned) of this little creation of His that He loves so much speaks volumes about His trust in that mother and His love for her and His desire for a relationship with her.

Just think about how difficult it can be for a mother to do something as (relatively speaking) simple as leaving her baby at daycare, especially at a particularly young age when doing so instigates much crying, and then think about all the things we as mortals can do to mess up everything - but God still lovingly bestows this gift upon the mothers of children throughout the world, choosing to trust them.

I just wanted to do a bit of diving into just how special and holy motherhood truly is. While the religious life is certainly a blessed one, don’t sell motherhood short!

Stephen

 

[AveSantaMaria]

Maybe it might help to say a novena for discernment. My sense is that you need a feeling of inner peace and certainty about the decision before it can be made for sure.

St. Maria Goretti is an excellent saint for a discernment in this area, particularly since she died at an extremely innocent age 11 and thus might have gone either way.
mariagoretti.org/links.htm
prayerbook.com/Novenas/gorenove.htm

St. Gianna Molla might be helpful to read upon - she wasn’t sure if she should be a missionary or a wife and so she went on pilgramage to a Marian apparition site in pursuit of an answer and received her answer immediately that she came home.

 

[Monica4316]

thank you!!

 

[Sillara]

My oldest daughter (still only 10) is already talking about a vocation to the religious life. She has been doing this for over three years now, ever since my husband and I converted to Catholicism. If she, or any or all, of our five daughters were to be called to the religious life, I know that I would be extremely proud and honored. Maybe your parents will, too?

 

[Craisin]

sometimes I feel that we demonstrate our love for God the most through obedience and sacrifice, and trust of Him… and I guess I can have that in both circumstances… but …I’m not sure how to put this, can I still totally ‘be His’ as a wife and mother? I’m sorry if this is a silly question but it’s a sincere concern that I have. Is it better…being a nun? because you’re giving up EVERYTHING for Him.
any thoughts?

You most certainly can still fully serve God and be married! When I think of all the sacrifices my mother has made for me…you would be fully serving God by serving your children and your husband. Look at Mary Mother of God and St. Joseph and Jesus…The Queen of Heaven, a mother herself, fully served God by being obedient to her call to be the MOTHER of God.

 

[Monica4316]

My oldest daughter (still only 10) is already talking about a vocation to the religious life. She has been doing this for over three years now, ever since my husband and I converted to Catholicism. If she, or any or all, of our five daughters were to be called to the religious life, I know that I would be extremely proud and honored. Maybe your parents will, too?

I don’t think they will be they are pretty much against the whole idea of religious life in general. Not just for me, but for anybody.

If I had a daughter or son who wanted to enter religious life I would be honoured too.

God bless you and your family

 

[Monica4316]

You most certainly can still fully serve God and be married! When I think of all the sacrifices my mother has made for me…you would be fully serving God by serving your children and your husband. Look at Mary Mother of God and St. Joseph and Jesus…The Queen of Heaven, a mother herself, fully served God by being obedient to her call to be the MOTHER of God.

I agree! but I think that each person is called to serve God in a particular way… I don’t know if mine is marriage; but, I see what you mean!

God bless

 

[onlylove]

This is a good thread, and I am also learning much as I read. I am divorced, annulled and have a 17 year old with disabilities.

After going to a psychologist for divorce recovery and post trauma therapy (who is a devout Catholic), she asked me if I ever considered a religious vocation. I found this quite shocking and my immediate answer was no.

My thoughts of a religious life was being a Nun. And this I am certain I am not being called for, and have known this practically all my life.

However, a third order sounds interesting to me. But I don’t know enough about them. I have had a spiritual director (priest) for years, but this subject has never come up. Wonder why?

I do know my vocation is to be a wife and mother. I am just learning what the true vocation of a wife really is. It seams like it takes a lifetime to understand it.

It really is a beautiful vocation to serve God with your husband, and to give of yourself without reserve no matter what. To keep your marriage pure and holy before God, and to know that you are consciously choosing to love your spouse. I like the fact of having a spouse as the spiritual head of my house. I have never had that before. I like the thoughts of having a partner to work with for the Kingdom of God, and to help each other achieve Heaven.

I guess I really don’t like the thought of doing it alone, and I just am so peaceful with the thought of having a husband again some day. If God allows me another spouse in the future, at least I will be better equip to discern if it is the “The One”.

How God is going to work this all our for me if he is calling me also into a third order of lay religious life. I have no clue.

Guess I will just have to wait and see.

 

[scoobydoo6v92]

There’s something I’ve been wondering about a lot lately. I don’t know for sure if I’m called to be a nun or not. I am feeling drawn to the religious life. But I haven’t done any real discerning yet. I’m very afraid of my family’s reaction, etc, so what I decided recently is that I’m just going to let God choose for me. I’d never have the courage to choose something like this myself, lol, only accept what His will is. I also decided to give Him time to show me His will, and not worry so much, but rather concentrate on loving and serving Him here and now, where I am.
But there’s one thing I’m wondering…

Let’s say that I’d be called to marriage instead and have a family. I know that if this is God’s will for me, it would be right to obey… and one thing that I really want - more and more, these past few months - is to live entirely for God. I believe that I’ll live entirely for Him if I’m entirely obedient… whether this would require a big sacrifice on my part (being a nun) or not. (to me, becoming a nun is a big sacrifice because I’m still so attached to the world).
Well - here’s my question… if I’ll end up having a family instead… would my relationship with God be as strong as if I were a nun? would I still be able to be consecrated to Him in some way…

sometimes I feel that we demonstrate our love for God the most through obedience and sacrifice, and trust of Him… and I guess I can have that in both circumstances… but …I’m not sure how to put this, can I still totally ‘be His’ as a wife and mother? I’m sorry if this is a silly question but it’s a sincere concern that I have. Is it better…being a nun? because you’re giving up EVERYTHING for Him. And - sometimes I don’t feel like I even want a boyfriend or husband - I mean naturally I do, at other times, but - often I feel like Jesus is enough. Like I would want to be spiritually ‘married’ to Him.

any thoughts?

Hello I understand your plight. Well sort of. I am of course a man so I was discerning the priesthood. The guy who posted the first response, He is correct in that ultimately it is our decision in the long run. In my case I kept running into brick walls and been put down by even people on this site. I was ignored by vocation directors I got a spiritual director and was ignored by him never called me or emailed me like he said he would But I kept wanting to get to atleast “first base” So much negative reactions from dioceses I figured it is time to except that either right now or for the rest of my life I am not called. Hurts??? you bet it does. But I ultimately decided right now it is not my calling. So you need to look at how you are treated. If you pursue your vocation and you keep getting further ahead like getting a spiritual director that talks to you and calls you back, That is good, then if you find a vocations director and she in your case invites you in and you feel good about it like at a retreat or something, You leave with contentment and peace you keep discerning and if the desire is getting stronger keep going. If on the other hand you keep hitting brick walls and no matter what you keep getting negative reactions then maybe God has something else in mind. I still don’t know what God wants for me. Gets frustrating and hurtful Be prepared for the incase. got to have a thick skin certainly thicker than mine. Read about Sister Faustina she didn’t have it easy but there was an order that finaly took her. I pray that you go for it we need nuns, And I have a very special feeling in my heart for nuns the best gift from God in my opinion and if I ever married and had a daughter I would give ANYTHING for her to be a Nun I love Nuns so much that I can’t explain it. When I see a nun I just got to go talk to her… Scoob