I'm 15 and already so scrupulous I can hardly live, please help?

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I’ve said this before to some other scrupulous posters, but it must be said:
  1. Go to one good, holy confessor, tell him you are scrupulous.
  2. Obey him in everything, and I mean absolutely, unconditionally, and completely, everything. If he imposes one Hail Mary on you, say one Hail Mary and consider it done, no matter what you think or feel. Again, obey.
  3. You should probably consider getting of these boards or any other, and do not ask people on the Internet for counsel for such a concern as yours. You cannot afford to listen to a whole gamut of voices with varying levels of knowledge and opinions. Only one voice matters, and that is that of your priest confessor.
 
You’ve said things like “because I didn’t realize it was a mortal sin…”

To have a mortal sin you need ALL THREE of these conditions:
  1. serious/grave matter - the act itself has to be serious - hitting would become mortal if you intended physical damage to the other person - if you WANTED the person to be injured.
  2. full knowledge - you have to KNOW that what you are doing is serious and that you’re damaging your relationship to God
  3. full consent - you decide wholeheartedly to do it - hitting a sibling spontaneously in reply to some argument or insult you received isn’t using full consent. If you sit and plan out an attack - that would be more like full consent.
Relax - God’s grace isn’t easily snatched away from you. You have to turn away from Him to lose it. Just be a good teenager and work on controlling your impulses.
 
Listen…to lie in confession about a mortal sin…is something one does intentionally…such as …

You murdered 3 persons and you intentionally say only one…

that would be a problem…

But honestly answering a question and then later fearing you mispoke…is not lying…🙂

(without getting into “particular questions or sins”…)

Remember too…mortal sin is when you have grave matter and this is done with full knowledge ( one needs to know that what one is going to do etc is serious) and full consent (deliberate consent)…

Compendium of the Catechism of the Catholic Church:
395. When does one commit a mortal sin?

1855-1861
1874

One commits a mortal sin when there are simultaneously present: grave matter, full knowledge, and deliberate consent…
  1. When does one commit a venial sin?
1862-1864
1875

One commits a venial sin, which is essentially different from a mortal sin, when the matter involved is less serious or, even if it is grave, when full knowledge or complete consent are absent…

Catechism:

1859 Mortal sin requires full knowledge and complete consent. It presupposes knowledge of the sinful character of the act, of its opposition to God’s law. It also implies a consent sufficiently deliberate to be a personal choice…

What you need to do is get a regular confessor and lay things before him…he can help you with your scrupulosity…

and when it comes to scruples…they are to be dismissed.

Think of a barking dog or a hissing goose…do you argue with a goose? or a dog that is barking? No …you keep walking …

When scruples come (unreasonable fears etc) turn to God and let them pass by…

…so listen to your confessor he will help you know what is a scruple and what is a sin etc…and learn to “ignore the barking dog” (this is advice from a Monk from the Middle Ages…)
 
A few more general comments…

Remember too…mortal sin is when you have grave matter and this is done with:

“full knowledge”

one does not of course need to think “if I murder this person it will break my relationship with God”…or even be aware of this… or know all the details of the seriousness of the sin…(such is not needed for "full’ knowledge…)

…but one does need to know that what you are doing is serious…many of which you will know very quickly…like murder…grand theft…lying in court under oath…blowing up your house…etc

But do NOT start thinking “everything” is grave matter for mortal sin!!! Such would be certainly scrupulosity!

Hence the high need for you to find a regular confessor!

he can help you know what is sin …and what is scruple …

🙂

…And of course it is done with full consent! …all sorts of temptations can happen …and not even one sin is committed (etc)

and full consent (deliberate consent)…
 
Aaww, I’m sorry to hear about your struggles:( I had the same exact problem and now I am getting counseling. The craziness started when I was around 11. I’m 17 now. PLEASE! Don’t make the mistake I did and delay professional counseling. Go to a counselor, nip it in the bud. Why wait?

Oh yeah! I read in a book (I think it’s called “Help for the Scrupulous”) that if you are scrupulous, you should go to confession no more than once a month. That’s the MOST you should go until you are better. And I agree with Eloi 100% 👍

Remember, God doesn’t want you to live in fear. He loves you and wants you to be happy. And I read this book that I highly recommend. It’s called “I Believe in Love: Retreat Conferences on the Interior Life” by Pere Jean du Coeur de Jesus D’Elbee.
 
If you need to release some stress and feel like hitting things take boxing lessons. I do it, and sometimes when I hit the bag I think of it as a demon who wishes to distort truth and ruin the liturgy 😉 it works everytime!
 
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