I'm not sure how to act if I decide to attend Mass

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mseb

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I accidentally brought this up in the wrong forum, and I feel silly. I think this forum might be okay…
I am a Protestant Christian and I have been exposed to a lot of bigotry against Catholicism. Since I’ve begun researching the Catholic faith, I’ve realized many of the beliefs I had accepted as facts were wrong and I’m starting to feel strongly led to the Catholic Church. I am considering contacting the local Church here in my community about beginning the conversion process and I’d like to attend Mass. The problem is, the only idea I have of Mass is what I’ve seen in movies and on t.v. I’m afraid that in my ignorance, I might do the wrong thing and offend someone. For example, do I kneel and cross myself when I come into the sanctuary(?) and when it’s time for communion, do I stay seated since I wasn’t baptized in the Catholic Church? Also, I’m used to church having services only on Sundays and Wednesdays, but when I looked at times for Mass on the local Catholic Church’s website, I noticed they have Mass everyday with some special sounding Masses at different times on Sunday. Which one should I go to? One last thing, my family and friends are probably going to be pretty upset when they find out I’m considering converting, but I’ve been doing research and I know many of the problems they have with Catholicism are based on stereotypes and propoganda; I know because I used to have the same beliefs. Does anyone know of a publication that is short, easy to read, but accurately states the main doctrines of the Catholic faith, maybe even written with the Protestant in mind? Thank you for your help in advance, Mary Berger
 
Hi and welcome to the CAF!

It’s great that you are willing to explore the Catholic faith.

I’ll try and answer some of your questions and I’m sure many others will fill the gaps and offer more ideas on how to proceed.

If you’ve never been to mass I suggest you go and sit in the back and observe what is going on. It will probably seem a bit (or very) confusing at first, but that’s ok. You’ll get used to it and learn about it more. And don’t worry about other people. You will not offend anybody. People are happy to see new faces. However, it might happen that nobody greets you or speaks to you. Some churches have ushers who welcome people at the door and give them readings for the day and hymnals. Many protestans feel dissappointed and even rejected when there is no warm welcome and an emphasis on fellowship among the parishoners. It is just a case of a different understanding of why we go to church and whappens there and it can take a bit of adjusting to. If you go during the week it will be more quiet, perhaps no singing and no sermon.
Have you ever watched EWTN? They have mass every day so perhaps you could have a look and get more familiar with it before you go.

There is one** big **rule that must be respected by all newcomers, and that is about Communion. When people get up to go and take communion just stay at your pew and pray. Only catholics in the state of grace can take communion. The church is very strict about this because it is the body and blood of Christ we receive (not a symbol) so only those who profess that belief can take it.
In case you decide to stay and become Catholic, you would have to go through several months of learning about the faith that would prepare you for reception into the church. That normally happens at Easter, and classes (called RCIA) start about now.

Here are some ideas about literature. Scott Hahn is a well known apologist who has written a number of books about different aspects of the Catholic faith. He is a convert, a former protestand minister and he often engages with protestans and has written several books that respond to some common misunderstandings from them.
I suggest you first read “Rome sweet home” about his journey to the Catholic church, “Reasons to believe” that defends the Catholic faith from common misunderstandings and take it from there. Another book that is great for newbies is *“Catholicism for dummies”. *It is concise and clear and very helpful.

I hope this proves to be useful. Best of luck on your journey and I hope you find CAF helpful.
 
Contra has pretty well covered it!!!

Thought I’d provide a link to EWTN for you so that you can look into streaming the mass if you don’t get EWTN on your TV.

I also strongly endorse the idea of simply sitting in the back, praying and listening and observing. Don’t worry that you don’t know what is going on. Stand, sit and knell when others do and, as already mentioned, just stay in your pew at communion - others will likely be doing the same so don’t worry about this - you won’t “stand out”.

This is a good time to look into the faith. RCIA courses are starting up in many places so please do contact you local parish.

Welcome Home…

Peace
James
 
Call the parish office and ask to make an appointment with the priest or deacon. You can have all your questions answered privately and will probably be given the name of the deacon or that of a few parishoners who can answer further concerns and help you to become comfortable. Visit as often as you feel the need, although appointments help them plan their day in busy parishes. They will be patient and very much want to welcome you.

As for your family, blame your parents. With a name as blessed as Mary, you probably had no choice.😉
 
mseb said:
I accidentally brought this up in the wrong forum, and I feel silly. I think this forum might be okay…
I am a Protestant Christian and I have been exposed to a lot of bigotry against Catholicism. Since I’ve begun researching the Catholic faith, I’ve realized many of the beliefs I had accepted as facts were wrong and I’m starting to feel strongly led to the Catholic Church.
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I would say the same thing as when I go to a Budhist Temple, to a Jewish Synanogue or, when they allow me, to a Muslim Mosque.
I show respect for what is going on but I am outside the action.
As a Catholic, I would say that you get up and down as the others do. As for kneeling, I do think it would be better for you to follow the crowd. Nothing that your theology as a protestant would be against.
Communion: no.
So, no problem, I think.
You are in the right mood as we see may times tourists coming and going and taking pictures of beatuiful cathedrals without any respect (the fault lies with the authorities…)
Welcome to the flock. I thnik there should be one flock, one shepherd. And I see not anyway of joining the Institutions. Only individual conversions may remedy what Reformations did.
My opinion, though, just personal.
 
I too am in the process of converting to Catholic so I have been going through some of the same things and having similar questions. I just started RCIA and attended my first Mass last Sunday. First I would encourage you to attend RCIA at a local parish because you will learn so much through the process. One of the class leaders at my parish invited me to sit with him and his wife at Mass and he helped me with the missal so that I wasn’t totally lost. I really appreciated that but in hindsight it wasn’t nearly as confusing as I anticipated. The point is I think if you just go to Mass and watch others you will be fine. I was told that it is acceptable to participate in everything except the Eucharist of course, as someone already mentioned. I truly enjoyed the Mass and have been looking forward all week to being able to attend again this Sunday. I think you will feel very comfortable quite quickly. At least that was my experience.
mseb said:
Does anyone know of a publication that is short, easy to read, but accurately states the main doctrines of the Catholic faith, maybe even written with the Protestant in mind? Thank you for your help in advance, Mary Berger
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Others have given you some good suggestions but I’ll offer one other reference that I found helpful. While I have moved on to more meatier publications since I began studying the Catholic faith, one of the best resources I found early on was Catholicism for Dummies by Father John Trigilio. It is a good basic introduction to Catholicism and used it for a starting point to further study. It is written in a clear, down to earth way and promotes easy understanding. I downloaded my copy for Kindle from Amazon but it is also available in paperback from all the major bookstores.

Good luck with your journey and God bless you.
 
mseb said:
I accidentally brought this up in the wrong forum, and I feel silly. I think this forum might be okay…
I am a Protestant Christian and I have been exposed to a lot of bigotry against Catholicism. Since I’ve begun researching the Catholic faith, I’ve realized many of the beliefs I had accepted as facts were wrong and I’m starting to feel strongly led to the Catholic Church. I am considering contacting the local Church here in my community about beginning the conversion process and I’d like to attend Mass. The problem is, the only idea I have of Mass is what I’ve seen in movies and on t.v.

I’m afraid that in my ignorance, I might do the wrong thing and offend someone. For example, do I kneel and cross myself when I come into the sanctuary(?) and when it’s time for communion, do I stay seated since I wasn’t baptized in the Catholic Church? Also, I’m used to church having services only on Sundays and Wednesdays, but when I looked at times for Mass on the local Catholic Church’s website, I noticed they have Mass everyday with some special sounding Masses at different times on Sunday. Which one should I go to?

One last thing, my family and friends are probably going to be pretty upset when they find out I’m considering converting, but I’ve been doing research and I know many of the problems they have with Catholicism are based on stereotypes and propoganda; I know because I used to have the same beliefs. Does anyone know of a publication that is short, easy to read, but accurately states the main doctrines of the Catholic faith, maybe even written with the Protestant in mind? Thank you for your help in advance, Mary Berger
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Hi Mary 🙂

If you want to follow the motions during the Mass, just do what everyone else is doing. The priest leads–if he stands, you stand, if he sits, you sit. (Except when the water and wine are brought to the altar. This is immediately after sermon.) You may also cross yourself or bow at the sanctuary. However, you’re certainly allowed to observe, and if you make a mistake it’s okay. You’re not the only one who’s new. 🙂

During Communion, you can receive a blessing from the priest if you cross your arms and lower your head a little.

If you want to meet the community, go to the Sunday service. I think “High Mass” means that the Mass is more elaborate–e.g., incense, full choir, the words are sung. If you prefer a more “smells and bells” experience, then go to that one.

I hope your family comes to be more supporting of you. The Rock Magazine, linked to this site, is a helpful source of information about the Church’s position on many things. As you’re studying, however, try to get some balanced counter-opinions on the Church’s positions.

Also, if your area has one, try visiting an Eastern Catholic Church. These are churches theologically in communion with Rome, whose traditions (liturgy, fasting, sacraments) are Eastern. You might like that as well.
 
Many priests (and mine was one of them) discourage going up for a blessing during communion. Just stay in your pew and say a private prayer to Jesus.

We all get blessed by the priest at the end of the Mass.
 
mseb said:
Also, I’m used to church having services only on Sundays and Wednesdays, but when I looked at times for Mass on the local Catholic Church’s website, I noticed they have Mass everyday with some special sounding Masses at different times on Sunday. Which one should I go to?
Click to expand...
Most Catholic Churches have mass every day (assuming there is a priest available), it is that important to us. The basic overall structure is the same, but there are some differences. Daily Mass has one less Bible reading (3 vs. 2), has a couple of prayers we don’t pray (the Gloria and Nicene Creed) and generally tends to have little or no music. Daily Mass is usually around 30 minutes while Sunday Mass is around an hour.

As for which to attend, that is really up to you and what you prefer. I started with Sunday Mass as I wanted to just go and blend into the crowd. Daily Mass generally has fewer people, but if you are the type who wants to ask someone questions and such, they are the ones to ask. They are often a bit older and many have been coming to mass everyday for years.

Most of all, welcome! Don’t worry too much. Most of us will won’t notice you don’t know what is going on and even if we do notice, we will be excited, it is always wonderful to have more people learning about the Catholic faith! :😃
 
Wow! Thanks so much for all the thoughtful replies, I feel much more at ease about attendeing Mass at the local parish and I’m definately going to check the links and literature that were suggested here. Just one thing though, I was actually looking for some simple books, tracts even, that I could give to anyone who might question me regarding the Catholic Church’s stand on key doctrinal points. I’m finding the answers to my questions, but I’m not quite ready to explain to others without a lot of stumbling and stammering. Also, I liked that Steve Hahn was mentioned, I’m reading his book, Hail, Holy Queen, right now and am finding it extremely helpful!
Again, I appreciate you all so much, I’ve been able to find answers to many of the “deep” questions of faith I’ve had, but it’s these niggling little details and doubts that have kept me from taking the step of actually going to church! You’ve all resolved so much for me and I’m ready to contact my local parish. Thank you!
 
mseb said:
Wow! Thanks so much for all the thoughtful replies, I feel much more at ease about attendeing Mass at the local parish and I’m definately going to check the links and literature that were suggested here. Just one thing though, I was actually looking for some simple books, tracts even, that I could give to anyone who might question me regarding the Catholic Church’s stand on key doctrinal points. I’m finding the answers to my questions, but I’m not quite ready to explain to others without a lot of stumbling and stammering. Also, I liked that Steve Hahn was mentioned, I’m reading his book, Hail, Holy Queen, right now and am finding it extremely helpful!
Again, I appreciate you all so much, I’ve been able to find answers to many of the “deep” questions of faith I’ve had, but it’s these niggling little details and doubts that have kept me from taking the step of actually going to church! You’ve all resolved so much for me and I’m ready to contact my local parish. Thank you!
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Catholic Answers, this website has a great book: Pillar of Fire, Pillar of Truth. Simply written and cheap. Awesome little book and really explains the faith.

shop.catholic.com/product.php?productid=16440&cat=10&page=6

Pillar of Fire, Pillar of Truth is a powerful, yet concise booklet that clearly defines the core beliefs of the Catholic faith! Each topic is easy to read and easy to understand. And everything is cross-referenced to the Catechism of the Catholic Church and supported by Sacred Scripture.

At 32 pages, Pillar of Fire, Pillar of Truth is packed with information about the Catholic Church and God’s plan for us. Plus, its convenient size and special pricing make it perfect to carry with you and give to others as you share your faith with them.

Discount pricing is available for orders of 100 booklets or more.
Options

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SKU CB0211
Weight 0.07 lbs
Author Catholic Answers
Format Booklet, 32 pgs
Price: US$1.00
 
JRKH said:
Contra has pretty well covered it!!!

Thought I’d provide a link to EWTN for you so that you can look into streaming the mass if you don’t get EWTN on your TV.

I also strongly endorse the idea of simply sitting in the back, praying and listening and observing. Don’t worry that you don’t know what is going on. Stand, sit and knell when others do and, as already mentioned, just stay in your pew at communion - others will likely be doing the same so don’t worry about this - you won’t “stand out”.

This is a good time to look into the faith. RCIA courses are starting up in many places so please do contact you local parish.

Welcome Home…

Strongly agree!
Peace
James
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A few things you may see people do -

There are holy water fonts at the entrances of Catholic churches (inside the sanctuary) and many Catholics dip their fingers in the holy water and then do the sign of the cross on themselves as they enter and leave the church. You may do this if you wish but nobody will notice or criticize you if you do not.

There is something called the “tabernacle” in Catholic churches which is where the body and blood of Christ are kept in the Church (the wine and host). Many Catholics reverence the tabernacle by doing a sign of the cross or bowing their head when they pass by it, particularly the priests and altar servers who may even get down on one knee and do the sign of the cross. So you may see people do this. The tabernacle is always lit with a candle or light that is kept on all the time. You do not have to know to do this - just if you notice someone doing this, they may be in front of the tabernacle.

It is a sign of reverence to go down on one knee and do the sign of the cross toward the altar and the image of Jesus on the cross, upon arriving in church and entering the pew, and upon leaving the church. Many people do not do this anymore and if you are not comfortable doing so it is ok.

Upon arrival, it is customary to pull out the kneeler, and kneel silently and pray for a few moments on your own. Again, if you are not comfortable doing so, it is ok and you can just sit and enjoy the quiet or music until the mass begins.

There will come a moment during the service when the priest will say, “let us all show one another a sign of peace” and it is customary to shake hands and say “peace be with you” to each of the people around you - in front of you, behind you, beside you. Ushers or the priest may approach you if you are nearby and also offer you a sign of the peace. Adults, and children participate in this.

During the Lords prayer many churches now have parishioners hold hands.

Some people are not able to kneel. if you are such a person, it is ok to remain seated but perch yourself a bit forward so that the person behind you may comfortably kneel. Otherwise, stand when others stand, kneel when others kneel, sit when others sit and you’ll be fine.

You will notice many people will have many of the songs and responses memorized. Don’t worry if you don’t know them - many people don’t. If you look around, you will notice many don’t say or sing anything (unfortunately!) either because they don’t know, or are too shy.

Welcome to the Catholic church, whether to visit or to stay, we are happy to have you.
 
formerlysure said:
A few things you may see people do -

There are holy water fonts at the entrances of Catholic churches (inside the sanctuary) and many Catholics dip their fingers in the holy water and then do the sign of the cross on themselves as they enter and leave the church. You may do this if you wish but nobody will notice or criticize you if you do not.

**There is something called the “tabernacle” in Catholic churches which is where the body and blood of Christ are kept in the Church (the wine and host). **
Welcome to the Catholic church, whether to visit or to stay, we are happy to have you.
Click to expand...
There is something called the “tabernacle” in Catholic churches which is where the body and blood of Christ are kept in the Church (the wine and host).

The blood of Christ is never kept in the tabernacle. It is always completely consumed at each Mass.

Only the Body (the consecrated host) is kept in the tabernacle.
During the Lords prayer many churches now have parishioners hold hands.
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Somehow this has become a habit in certain parishes. This is not part of the GIRM (General Instruction of the Roman Missal) and is actually not to be done. It irritates me when someone tries to grab my hand during the Our Father. I am praying to God not having fellowship.
Welcome to the Catholic church, whether to visit or to stay, we are happy to have you.
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As formerlysure says, Welcome.
 
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