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Mt19_26
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I am seeking opinions on whether or not someone should continue to be friends with some one who opening lives in immorality after you pointed out to them the wrongness of their actions.
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Madaglan
Guest
It’s hard to say, since you don’t mention that immoral activity and the degree to which it affects you. If the other person helps cause you to sin, then the best thing to do is avoid the person. However, if you feel that you’re not being unduly influenced, then stay friends in the hope that he or she might change his or her life for the better.
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mkw
Guest
Jesus associated with sinners of all kinds.
The best influence we have on others is how we live our faith. Be a positive influence on your friend, and pray that the seeds you have planted may take root through the power of the Holy Spirit.
Like madaglan said though, if your friend causes YOU to sin, or puts you in a compromising situation that may lead you to sin, then you would be wise in putting distance between you and your friend. But never stop praying for him/her.
The best influence we have on others is how we live our faith. Be a positive influence on your friend, and pray that the seeds you have planted may take root through the power of the Holy Spirit.
Like madaglan said though, if your friend causes YOU to sin, or puts you in a compromising situation that may lead you to sin, then you would be wise in putting distance between you and your friend. But never stop praying for him/her.
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Tyler_Smedley
Guest
I agree, you can hang out with them as long as it doesn’t influence your behavior. They need an example of how to live and maybe you can be that to them.
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JustSomeGuy
Guest
so st. augustine and st. thomas aquinas are sitting up in heaven asking, “cause you to sin? what does that mean?”
other people don’t cause you to sin. you are responsible for your sins. they are responsbile for theirs.
mkw was saying that Jesus hung out with sinners. if you just leave, how will you change them? mail them letters?
if you remain friends, whether they “cause” you to sin or not, if you also act like it doesn’t matter, then that sin is yours. they will not have “caused” you to do that either. but don’t nag them either, or they will just decide to stop hanging with you.
half my friends are ridiculous sinners. the only reason i’m not exposed to their drug use is because they know i’d try to throw it in the toilet. when they know they’re going to do something that i don’t approve of, they don’t invite me. if you say it right, you don’t have to say it more than once. they haven’t changed yet, but if i abandon them what would make them think about it?
stick with them! be clear! your presence is a message!
other people don’t cause you to sin. you are responsible for your sins. they are responsbile for theirs.
mkw was saying that Jesus hung out with sinners. if you just leave, how will you change them? mail them letters?
if you remain friends, whether they “cause” you to sin or not, if you also act like it doesn’t matter, then that sin is yours. they will not have “caused” you to do that either. but don’t nag them either, or they will just decide to stop hanging with you.
half my friends are ridiculous sinners. the only reason i’m not exposed to their drug use is because they know i’d try to throw it in the toilet. when they know they’re going to do something that i don’t approve of, they don’t invite me. if you say it right, you don’t have to say it more than once. they haven’t changed yet, but if i abandon them what would make them think about it?
stick with them! be clear! your presence is a message!
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Mycroft
Guest
yeah that is a good point, nobody really “causes” you to sin. its always up to you in the end.
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eleusis
Guest
Part of the situation is that one cannot give the appearance of condoning the immorality. Like going to a friends house who is having a group thing going on upstairs and you just hang out down stairs watching the tele until they are all done. You lend the situation legitimacy by your presence and also others may be influenced to stumble too by your less than Godly appearence.
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Joe_Kelley
Guest
We are called not only to avoid sin, but also near occasions of sin.
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puzzleannie
Guest
Mt19:26:
they remained friends with you after you pointed out the wrongness of their actions?I am seeking opinions on whether or not someone should continue to be friends with some one who opening lives in immorality after you pointed out to them the wrongness of their actions.
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kamz
Guest
This really hits home for me, my very close friend that I’ve known for 15 years has lived with her boyfriend for the past 10 years, they have two children together, it started out that they were going to get married but it just never seemed to happen and I think she is afraid to rock the boat so she doesn’t even bring it up to him. I love her dearly, she is a wonderful, caring person, she is a really loving mom but I have a really hard time with the fact that she doesn’t get married to this guy and I’ve had to pull back a little from our friendship so my children won’t be influenced, my older kids started asking after playing with my friends children why the mom and dad lived together but were not married, and that was hard to explain to them, I don’t want my kids to think I am ok with that as I would be very upset if my kids grow up and live with someone before marriage. My friend knows I do not approve and I really feel she is selling herself short, its like this guy she is with has the attitude “why pay for the milk when I can get it for free” or however that silly saying goes, I love my friend and I really do want the very best for her and I want her to be loved like she should be and respected and I don’t feel that she is being respected and she is not demanding that this guy marry her or get out, it is really hard, so I just love her and pray for her and lead by example, she knows how I feel and it has caused some strain between us but she knows I am Always there for her if she needs me and I hope and pray things will change for her.
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Madaglan
Guest
Originally Quoted by JustSomeGuy:
so st. augustine and st. thomas aquinas are sitting up in heaven asking, “cause you to sin? what does that mean?”
You are correct. What I meant, and what I should have been more meticulous in writing, is that bad friends lead one into situations in which one has to make tough decisions whether to sin or not. By hanging around with bad influences you are under more temptation to sin than were you to stay at home and read your Bible, or to be with good Christian friends. Hanging around bad friends does not “cause” one to sin, since one has free will, but it does oftentimes cause one to be put in an awkward situation when one has to choose sin or “popularity,” “coolness,” and “manliness.”other people don’t cause you to sin. you are responsible for your sins. they are responsbile for theirs.
So, I should have dropped the “help you sin” phrase and replaced it with the above elucidation.
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Joe_Kelley
Guest
Note Catechism of Catholic Church - Re Scandal
II. Respect for the Dignity of Persons
Respect for the souls of others: scandal
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Scandal is an attitude or behavior which leads another to do evil. The person who gives scandal becomes his neighbor’s tempter. He damages virtue and integrity; he may even draw his brother into spiritual death. Scandal is a grave offense if by deed or omission another is deliberately led into a grave offense.
2285
Scandal takes on a particular gravity by reason of the authority of those who cause it or the weakness of those who are scandalized. It prompted our Lord to utter this curse: "Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened round his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea."86 Scandal is grave when given by those who by nature or office are obliged to teach and educate others. Jesus reproaches the scribes and Pharisees on this account: he likens them to wolves in sheep’s clothing.87
It seems to indicate that we can, and do, cause others to sin.2287
Anyone who uses the power at his disposal in such a way that it leads others to do wrong becomes guilty of scandal and responsible for the evil that he has directly or indirectly encouraged. “Temptations to sin are sure to come; but woe to him by whom they come!”
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Kevin_Walker
Guest
You really must make that hard decision for yourself.
I have learned the hard way a long time ago to break off any friendship, acquaintanceship, or developing acquaintanceship with anyone whose morals offends me.
I refuse to socialize with known adulterers, wife beaters, homosexuals, liars, exhibitionists, thieves; communists, atheists, satanists; or chronic drunks, gamblers, drifters, foul-mouths, womanizers, dirtballs, or anything which is a moral hazard.
I may be forced to work with some of these characters, but I don’t have to socialize with them. I would prefer to be alone with God than chum around with guys or gals with really bad filthy habits.
I have learned the hard way a long time ago to break off any friendship, acquaintanceship, or developing acquaintanceship with anyone whose morals offends me.
I refuse to socialize with known adulterers, wife beaters, homosexuals, liars, exhibitionists, thieves; communists, atheists, satanists; or chronic drunks, gamblers, drifters, foul-mouths, womanizers, dirtballs, or anything which is a moral hazard.
I may be forced to work with some of these characters, but I don’t have to socialize with them. I would prefer to be alone with God than chum around with guys or gals with really bad filthy habits.
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Mt19_26
Guest
Kevin Walker:
“Do not be deceived: Bad company ruins good morals” 1 Cor 15:33
I have also learned the hard way. People I hung around with in the past influenced me to do things I knew I really should not have done. I am not blaming them for what I did, but I know if I hung around the “good” crowd I would not have done many of those things.I have learned the hard way a long time ago to break off any friendship, acquaintanceship, or developing acquaintanceship with anyone whose morals offends me.
“Do not be deceived: Bad company ruins good morals” 1 Cor 15:33
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demolitionman65
Guest
St. Paul addresses this in one of his epistles (which one escapes me right now):
“When a member of the church is in error, correct individually, then with a friends, then by the community. If the point is still not taken, the person needs to be avoided.”
Your own conscience must be a partial guide here, but if the immoral behavior is a near occasion of sin for you, you must limit your contact with that person.
“When a member of the church is in error, correct individually, then with a friends, then by the community. If the point is still not taken, the person needs to be avoided.”
Your own conscience must be a partial guide here, but if the immoral behavior is a near occasion of sin for you, you must limit your contact with that person.
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