Improving my Relationship with my younger brother

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Hey all.

I am struggling with my relationship with my younger brother.

I am 16 and he is 12.

I am usually off in my own world, on my computer, thinking or reading about religion or politics. He is usually off in his own world, building legos or drawing or tinkering. So we have a LOT of trouble bonding and even talking. When we DO talk, we usually clash and fight brutally with each other.

How can I become a better role model to him as an older brother, and become closer to him as a friend, ESPECIALLY in relation to the Catholic Faith and being a strong, pure man?
 
Praying for you and your brother. May be you are just too young to realise the depth of your bond?? Moving ahead in life you will have ample situations where you will realise what having a brother means no matter how dfferent you are u will need each other! Blood is thicker than water dear brother.
Keeping the two of you in prayers
 
I can’t think of any specific advice right now, but I will say that your description of your relationship with your brother, reminds me a lot of how my relationship with my sister used to be when I was your age. We were only 2 years apart but she was rather immature for her age (as in, watching TV shows meant for kids 3-4 years below her age). While at the same time I was reading way above my grade level and taking college level courses in high school. It seemed we had nothing in common.

But as we grew older, our relationship improved a lot. I just wanted to state that, sometimes siblings who aren’t close as kids, do get closer as they both mature and age differences become less significant.
 
It’s great that you want to improve your relationship with your brother.

You are on the edge of becoming an adult, and he is still a child, so it falls on you to set the tone of the relationship.
Your signature indicates that you repect our Lady.I would recommend spending 5 minutes thinking about how she would have related to a younger, perhaps annoying, sibling when she was young. Or consider how St Joseph would have dealt with a younger brother: hopefully with respect and friendliness.

You say you fight brutally. It takes 2 to fight. What if you were to shrug off any unkind comment of his, say something like, “hey, I don’t think you meant that.” and walk away.
Could you take an interest in his activities? You could admire his drawings, ask what he’s building, ask if you can help him build something with legos.
True, this might not be your intellectual level. But I’ve built many a lego structure with 2 and 3 year olds, and it didn’t damage my brain. It can be kind of fun.

And of course, pray for him. It’s hard to yell at someone when you’ve prayed for them recently.
God bless.

.
 
He is showing you what you are doing with your “brainwork” - drawing and building!

Ps 127 paints a picture of complementary ministries that mean that the Body of Christ shall not be ashamed.

Mt 7:15-29. Bearing good fruit, doing the will of Father, founding the house solidly.

Our Father said.
 
Treat him to an afternoon out with The Big Bro’. Get a pizza and go to the arcade; see a movie and have burgers later or go ride go carts…etc. Really listen when he talks and make the few hours all about HIM. You guys probably have more in common than you thought.
 
I never got along with my younger brother, either. I feel for your situation.

If I could go back and do it all over again, I would try to be the bigger man. We both have strong personalities, even when we were very young, and there was always an underlying feeling of conflict. Each of us was always on the defensive. I’d spend more time with him, doing things that he liked. I would’ve been more generous with… everything.
 
ialsop said:
Hey all.

I am struggling with my relationship with my younger brother.

I am 16 and he is 12.

I am usually off in my own world, on my computer, thinking or reading about religion or politics. He is usually off in his own world, building legos or drawing or tinkering. So we have a LOT of trouble bonding and even talking. When we DO talk, we usually clash and fight brutally with each other.

How can I become a better role model to him as an older brother, and become closer to him as a friend, ESPECIALLY in relation to the Catholic Faith and being a strong, pure man?
Click to expand...
take some time to just do stuff that he likes, maybe you can help him build lego or find some activity thatyouo both enjoy
 
God bless you two. I wish I had a good relationship with my brother.
 
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