In op-ed article, a mother praises condom party for teenagers

[Riley259]

This opinion column appeared in my local newspaper in Massachusetts. It was originally written by a writer for the LA Times. The writer is a mom whose 13 yr. old teenage daughter just came home from a school sponsored condom party that explicitly teaches teens how to put on condoms (among other things). Each kid gets a “gift” bag when they leave the party that includes condoms, and pamplets on masturbation, oral sex and intercourse. The article goes on about how her initial reaction is concern but then she is relieved to know that her kid will know everything she needs to know about sex to make an informed decision. By the end of the article, she’s singing the praises of this school program in California. If this doesn’t highlight what’s wrong with our culture then I don’t know what does. A reprint of the article from the internet is below:
latimes.com/news/opinion/commentary/la-oe-hoder13feb13,0,3294373.story?coll=la-news-comment-opinions

 

[a_cermak]

Well, it seemed a little graphic to me too, and yet, it’s a voluntary program, parents don’t have to send their kids. Only children who have completed the human health program that goes into sex and STDs can attend, so they’ve already been exposed to the information in class anyway. And statistics show that teens are having sex. A lot of it, in fact. STDs are out there and while nothing is as good of a protection as abstinence, not all children will abstain. If they are prepared to use protection when they do have sex, then thats good stuff to me. Or if they can re-channel their sexual urges towards less harmful sex such as mast., which is pretty much disease free, then that’s even better.

As long as it’s optional, leaving the decision up to children and their parents, I’m a big fan of sex ed. Among other things, people today get married later and they’re not abstaining in their 20’s, so the sex ed they learn in school needs to last.

 

[Clonereject1138]

Seems rather silly to me. What happened to the “Close your eyes, and think of England” attitude? Sex isn’t fun! It’s not to be looked forward to! Its neccesary to ensure the spread of humans, but these…people make it sound like…Sheesh!! What’s the world coming to…

Whats this “Teenagers are going to have sex if they want to”??? Dammit, if they aren’t married they are gonna get themselves stoned!!! By that I mean rocks thrown at em

Gah lee. It’s like I missed the age of decensy. Safe sex, pah. No such thing. Only saftey is chastity. Pamplets on masturbation, so they are teachin em how??? Teaching our kids how to commit a crime against nature and reason!!!

Condom party. God save us, we sure as hell can’t. :crying: Why do they have to be sooo stupid!!!..

Of course that could just be California…Oy veh.

 

[BlindSheep]

a_cermak:

And statistics show that teens are having sex. A lot of it, in fact.

and they’re not abstaining in their 20’s, so the sex ed they learn in school needs to last.

And giving teens the impression that this is OK and expected has a lot to do with it.
I went through this in public school in the 90’s - these programs are designed to make teens who aren’t having sex feel like freaks, and to give the impression that premarital sex is just fine as long as it’s “safe”. Why do you think the biggest promoters of sex-ed are the companies that profit from birth control and abortion? And besides, if teens and young adults are so incapable of self control, how did the majority manage to control themselves in the past?
Don’t kid yourself - promoting condoms does not just affect those who would “do it anyway”.

 

[Toni]

BlindSheep:

Don’t kid yourself - promoting condoms does not just affect those who would “do it anyway”.

A little much. I am just grateful my kids are raised. But now I worry about my grandkids.
This is no different than handing a child an open candy bar and telling them not to eat it till they are ready. PULLLLEEAASSEEE!:banghead:

 

[Riley259]

a_cermak:

Well, it seemed a little graphic to me too, and yet, it’s a voluntary program, parents don’t have to send their kids. Only children who have completed the human health program that goes into sex and STDs can attend, so they’ve already been exposed to the information in class anyway. And statistics show that teens are having sex. A lot of it, in fact. STDs are out there and while nothing is as good of a protection as abstinence, not all children will abstain. If they are prepared to use protection when they do have sex, then thats good stuff to me. Or if they can re-channel their sexual urges towards less harmful sex such as mast., which is pretty much disease free, then that’s even better.

As long as it’s optional, leaving the decision up to children and their parents, I’m a big fan of sex ed. Among other things, people today get married later and they’re not abstaining in their 20’s, so the sex ed they learn in school needs to last.

You say “using protection” is “good stuff”. I gather that you’re not a practicing Catholic then otherwise you would know that having pre-marital sex (especially among teens) is definitely bad stuff. The Catholic church’s teaching on this matter is the only choice that is morally (and safely) sound. I’d recommend reading anything by Chris West for a good explanation of church teaching in this area.

 

[mlchance]

There is no such thing as safe sex. The application of that adjective to that particular activity is one of the great lies of the modern world.

– Mark L. Chance.

 

[a_cermak]

Riley259:

You say “using protection” is “good stuff”. I gather that you’re not a practicing Catholic then otherwise you would know that having pre-marital sex (especially among teens) is definitely bad stuff. The Catholic church’s teaching on this matter is the only choice that is morally (and safely) sound. I’d recommend reading anything by Chris West for a good explanation of church teaching in this area.

No, I’m a practicing Episcopalian. And yes, sex outside of marriage is sinful, I wouldn’t disagree with that. However, to just state that and then say so everything is fine is to be in a state of denial. Unmarried people are having sex out there. Regardless of what this does to the state of their soul, condoms can protect against physical diseases, which is what sex ed programs are concerned with.

And if I recall, there was a lot more teen marriages in the 50’s and before, so I’m not sure self control is really the big issue here. The fact is that with the age at first marriage being in the mid to late 20’s, people are being asked to abstain for longer than they ever have before.

 

[Rob_s_Wife]

Clonereject1138:

Seems rather silly to me. What happened to the “Close your eyes, and think of England” attitude? Sex isn’t fun! It’s not to be looked forward to! Its neccesary to ensure the spread of humans, but these…people make it sound like…Sheesh!! What’s the world coming to…

Oh my goodness! I hope you’re joking?! I laughed so hard when I read that I nearly wet my pants (my huge pregnant with baby #8 maternity pants!). Sure sex can be fun and should be looked forward to - in the sacrament of marriage! That is what all those sex-crazed kids really need to know. It’s the knowledge and comfort of having that special act in a marital relationship of shared love and comfort through out a couples life together that makes it such a fun and good thing to look forward to. That’s what they are missing with random sex with no real connection being made and we do them a horrible lack of service to let them continue in ignorance.

Only saftey is chastity. Pamplets on masturbation, so they are teachin em how?!?!?

Condom party. God save us, we sure as hell can’t. :crying: Why do they have to be sooo stupid!!!..

**On the rest, I agree completely! **

 

[Rob_s_Wife]

a_cermak:

And if I recall, there was a lot more teen marriages in the 50’s and before, so I’m not sure self control is really the big issue here. The fact is that with the age at first marriage being in the mid to late 20’s, people are being asked to abstain for longer than they ever have before.

:yup: On this I do agree with you that part of the problem is expecting abstaining to last much longer than in the past. Historicly and by physical nature, age 15/16 was the normal age for sexual and adult commitments to begin. However, your average 15/15 year old from 50 or 100 years ago was MUCH more mature and had much higher expectations to behave in a mature manner than the same age person in today’s society. The hazard of raising such immature teens for the past several generations is that it has not affected their natural physical development. So we have all these teens with their clocks telling their bodies it’s time to have adult acts and to seek such relationships - but they are completely uneducated in how to handle such in a mature manner.

---

I don’t think the answer is to just throw our hands up in defeat and give in.

---

The answer is to stop raising such immature people in the first place. If they aren’t mature enough to have sex in a responsible manner with all the consequences it comes with in a committed marital relationship - they aren’t mature enough to be having sex at all.

 

[Riley259]

a_cermak:

No, I’m a practicing Episcopalian. And yes, sex outside of marriage is sinful, I wouldn’t disagree with that. However, to just state that and then say so everything is fine is to be in a state of denial. Unmarried people are having sex out there. Regardless of what this does to the state of their soul, condoms can protect against physical diseases, which is what sex ed programs are concerned with.

And if I recall, there was a lot more teen marriages in the 50’s and before, so I’m not sure self control is really the big issue here. The fact is that with the age at first marriage being in the mid to late 20’s, people are being asked to abstain for longer than they ever have before.

You agree above that sex outside of marriage is sinful but then you seem to suggest that since they’re doing it anyway we might as well use another sinful practice (contraception) to reduce disease. I don’t believe that fighting sin with sin is going to be the answer. We need to teach kids why having sex before marriage is not a good thing so that they won’t feel the need to use condoms. Jason Evert does talks about this subject with high school kids all around the country and it seems to be having an effect. I’d recommend getting his video, “Romance without Regrets” - it’s excellent!

 

[a_cermak]

True, to Catholics contraception is sinful. However, remember I’m Episcopalian , so it’s not sinful to me or other non-Catholics. And remember this program is voluntary so Catholics could keep their children home if they wanted, while those who don’t believe condoms are sinful would be free to attend. That’s why I really don’t see anything wrong with this program–there’s nothing coercive about it. I’d feel differently if it was a mandatory program.

 

[Rosalinda]

Any parent who is so naive as to believe their children are protected because they know how to use condoms should read the following Life Issues article "Condoms Useless Against Papilloma Virus:

QUOTE]The second deadliest form of cancer for women around the world is cervical cancer. A recent Canadian study reports that condoms “do not appear to be effective in preventing HPV infection…**We owe it to young Canadian women to tell them that condoms will not protect them from sexually incurred cervical cancer.” **According to a recent survey published in the Canadian Medical Journal, 24% of Canadian women, age 20 to 24, were HPV positive and 20%, ages 15 to 19, were positive. The reason for this is that HPV infection is spread by skin-to-skin contact, not just by body fluids. It concludes: "If we really want to teach young Canadian women about safe sex, medical evidence, as much as traditional morality, suggests that parents and educators must place a greater emphasis on sexual responsibility and the dangers of promiscuity and less on a ready supply of condoms."HIV and Condoms – Prevention?
lifeissues.org/international/v11no5.html

Women are dying in U.S. at the rate of 8,000 deaths annually as a result of this infection. By the time the children figure out that they have bought into the big lie about the “safety” of contraception it is too late. Responsible parents should do their homework and protect their families with the truth. Otherwise, you’re throwing your children into the feeding frenzy of predator sex-crazed sharks. :tsktsk: As for the danger of HIV/AIDS that is already being discussed in another thread.:crying:

 

[Kendy]

Riley259:

You agree above that sex outside of marriage is sinful but then you seem to suggest that since they’re doing it anyway we might as well use another sinful practice (contraception) to reduce disease. I don’t believe that fighting sin with sin is going to be the answer. We need to teach kids why having sex before marriage is not a good thing so that they won’t feel the need to use condoms. Jason Evert does talks about this subject with high school kids all around the country and it seems to be having an effect. I’d recommend getting his video, “Romance without Regrets” - it’s excellent!

I think it’s possible to believe that sex outside of marriage is absolutely wrong, but realize that if people are going to have sex anyway, then maybe, they should use condoms. Of course, condoms are not 100% safe (only abstinance is), but they are a lot safer than using nothing. My parents are both committed Christians and when I was growing up, they insisted that I wait until to marriage, but when I got to college and they knew that I just wasn’t doing that, they had to think about my safety. While I always knew my mom would prefer that I wasn’t having sex, she told me that there were diseases out there and I should at least be safe and avoid a pregnancy, which I could not have afforded with a man I would not have wanted to marry.

Now, I know you’re thinking if you can’t afford the baby and you can’t marry the man, why are you having sex? Fair enough, but if you had said that to me five years ago, I would have just laughed at you. So, as difficult as it was for my parents, they had to settle for the next best thing, my safety.

Kendy

 

[fix]

a_cermak:

True, to Catholics contraception is sinful. However, remember I’m Episcopalian , so it’s not sinful to me or other non-Catholics. And remember this program is voluntary so Catholics could keep their children home if they wanted, while those who don’t believe condoms are sinful would be free to attend. That’s why I really don’t see anything wrong with this program–there’s nothing coercive about it. I’d feel differently if it was a mandatory program.

Contraception is evil no matter who is doing it. How culpable one will be judged if one used it would depend on how much effort one took to learn the truth I would think.

 

[puzzleannie]

DD just called to chat and told me she went to the parents meeting at their Catholic school for 5th grade parents about the sex ed/Christian sexual morality classes that begin this year. They got a chance to review all materials (including Touching Safety) that will be used in gradese 6-8, and ask questions. Also books available for parents to present the physical aspects of maturation and reproduction at home. She was in shock because a few parents asked if ABC and condoms will be covered in these classes, and if not, why not. When the principal explained that in a Catholic school we do not present this as options the parents got quite huffy and defensive.

 

[puzzleannie]

DD just called to chat and told me she went to the parents meeting at their Catholic school for 5th grade parents about the sex ed/Christian sexual morality classes that begin next year. They got a chance to review all materials (including Touching Safety) that will be used in gradese 6-8, and ask questions. Also books available for parents to present the physical aspects of maturation and reproduction at home. She was in shock because a few parents asked if ABC and condoms will be covered in these classes, and if not, why not. When the principal explained that in a Catholic school we do not present this as options the parents got quite huffy and defensive.

 

[Riley259]

Kendy:

I think it’s possible to believe that sex outside of marriage is absolutely wrong, but realize that if people are going to have sex anyway, then maybe, they should use condoms. Of course, condoms are not 100% safe (only abstinance is), but they are a lot safer than using nothing. My parents are both committed Christians and when I was growing up, they insisted that I wait until to marriage, but when I got to college and they knew that I just wasn’t doing that, they had to think about my safety. While I always knew my mom would prefer that I wasn’t having sex, she told me that there were diseases out there and I should at least be safe and avoid a pregnancy, which I could not have afforded with a man I would not have wanted to marry.

Now, I know you’re thinking if you can’t afford the baby and you can’t marry the man, why are you having sex? Fair enough, but if you had said that to me five years ago, I would have just laughed at you. So, as difficult as it was for my parents, they had to settle for the next best thing, my safety.

Kendy

That still doesn’t make it right. The truth of the Catholic church’s teaching on contraception and John Paul II’s Theology of the Body is clear and makes sense if you really study it. Unfortunately, many people can’t be bothered with it and take the shortest route to pleasure but in the long run they’re always compromising their happiness and right relationship with God

 

[TarAshly]

Clonereject1138:

Seems rather silly to me. What happened to the “Close your eyes, and think of England” attitude? Sex isn’t fun! It’s not to be looked forward to! Its neccesary to ensure the spread of humans, but these…people make it sound like…Sheesh!! What’s the world coming to…

Whats this “Teenagers are going to have sex if they want to”??? Dammit, if they aren’t married they are gonna get themselves stoned!!! By that I mean rocks thrown at em

Gah lee. It’s like I missed the age of decensy. Safe sex, pah. No such thing. Only saftey is chastity. Pamplets on masturbation, so they are teachin em how??? Teaching our kids how to commit a crime against nature and reason!!!

Condom party. God save us, we sure as hell can’t. :crying: Why do they have to be sooo stupid!!!..

Of course that could just be California…Oy veh.

Sex between two married consenting adults can be fun, and often looked forward too. Sex is more than just for producing babies and its way more than robotics, its about connection and love as well and when two people love each other it can be A LOT of fun, and VERY looked forward too. just my :twocents:

 

[m134e5]

Riley259:

This opinion column appeared in my local newspaper in Massachusetts. It was originally written by a writer for the LA Times.

Note to self…It’s going to have a strong liberal bias.

Riley259:

The writer is a mom whose 13 yr. old teenage daughter just came home from a school sponsored condom party

Hmm…when I was a kid we had popcorn parties.

Riley259:

that explicitly teaches teens how to put on condoms (among other things).

Umm…you just…put it on…it really isn’t rocket science!

Riley259:

Each kid gets a “gift” bag when they leave the party that includes condoms,

I guess they ran out of balloons.

Riley259:

and pamplets on masturbation, oral sex and intercourse.

It really isn’t that complicated of an act…

Riley259:

The article goes on about how her initial reaction is concern but then she is relieved to know that her kid will know everything she needs to know about sex to make an informed decision.

Yes…now she doesn’t have to tell her.

Riley259:

By the end of the article, she’s singing the praises of this school program in California.

Will she be singing the same praises while she is buying medicine to treat her daughter should she ever get genital herpes (which condoms do very little to prevent)?