In order to get rid of masturbation, do I have to get married?

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I am a 22-year-old male Catholic. I have masturbated for many years. Since it is a sin, I want to get rid of it. But I have made little progress.

Catholicism teaches that for whatever God commands, he makes it possible. So, there must be a way for me to get rid of masturbation. But, is getting married the only way for me to get rid of masturbation?

I am still studying. I am pursing a Master degree. And I want to consider getting married only after I have a stable job.

Besides, actually, I don’t want to get married (but this is not a fixed decision). This is because if I get married, I will need to take care of my wife and my children (if any), and support the family, and will be less free. Is my thought too self-centred?
 
Whenever you feel the urge to masturbate start praying multiple Hail Marys. Perhaps 7-10 of them (more if needed)

It works, trust me.

As far as getting married… getting married isn’t a cure to masturbation. You need to lean to control it now with prayer before you get married.

God Bless
 
Yes, there is solution, confession and prayer, fighting with tempations, not watching on girls at all(the best is to look at her face), staying pure in your speech, accepting natural-based things in your nature(wet dreams etc., things you are not responsible for unless you provoke them). Throwing out all instagram, snapchat, unliking facebook pages with suspected content, uninstalling inappropriate games, not watching films after 9-10pm(especially action films).
It is easy not to masturbate if you dont choose it. But then comes the mess in your mind. Images from the past.

So you want to get married to do things that married people are allowed to as an opposite to masturbation, but you dont want to be responsible for your family? Isnt it using your spouse like an object? Well, yes, your thought is self-centred, it is easy deduction.
 
A wife is not a tool to satisfy lust. Please think of the nature of marriage. In a marriage, you will need to control far more than just lust, otherwise it’s not a joy, but pain for all people involved.
 
Have you tried the rosary?

no problem that can’t be solved by the rosary - sister lucia of fatima
 
someone429 said:
But, is getting married the only way for me to get rid of masturbation?
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No. In fact you should definitely kick this habit before you even consider getting married.

Focus in building self control in minor ways. Fast, pray, deny yourself little things.
 
Just keep going to confession. Finish your schooling and get your career started :+1:It’s not the end of the world.
 
someone429 said:
I am a 22-year-old male Catholic. I have masturbated for many years. Since it is a sin, I want to get rid of it. But I have made little progress.

Catholicism teaches that for whatever God commands, he makes it possible. So, there must be a way for me to get rid of masturbation. But, is getting married the only way for me to get rid of masturbation?

I am still studying. I am pursing a Master degree. And I want to consider getting married only after I have a stable job.

Besides, actually, I don’t want to get married (but this is not a fixed decision). This is because if I get married, I will need to take care of my wife and my children (if any), and support the family, and will be less free. Is my thought too self-centred?
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How does grace work? “There is a supernatural intervention of God in the faculties of the soul, which precedes the free act of the will.” and “There is a supernatural influence of God in the faculties of the soul which coincides in time with man’s free act of will.” - Fundamentals of Catholic Dogma, Ludwig Ott.

Pursue that vocation which will best serve the Church.

Catechism
796 … The Apostle speaks of the whole Church and of each of the faithful, members of his Body, as a bride “betrothed” to Christ the Lord so as to become but one spirit with him. …
798 The Holy Spirit is “the principle of every vital and truly saving action in each part of the Body.” …
799 Whether extraordinary or simple and humble, charisms are graces of the Holy Spirit which directly or indirectly benefit the Church, ordered as they are to her building up, to the good of men, and to the needs of the world.
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Masturbation becomes an addiction. I know it’s been said above, but marriage is not a cure. It’s like an alcoholic thinking he will stop drinking after he’s married. It doesn’t work.
 
I’m 22 and had the same problem for few months… I struggled for months with temptations to that sin and fell multiple times. The lust was just so strong that I felt I couldn’t overcome it, though I was trying to pray when temptations came. Now it’s been 9 months that I hadn’t mastrubate (though I know I am weak and I can fall again tomorrow if God doesn’t protect me). God will help you if you pray for that grace and if you are resolute to fight until you win.
My advice: when you fall, go to confession as soon as you can, don’t wait for few days. That will prevent lust from growing. Pray every time temptations come. St Alphonsus Liguori says that those who pray when temptation comes won’t fall. Confess and communicate frequently (but confess those sins and all mortal sins before communion). Then, I recommend fasting and mortification of flesh. Cold shower can be useful. Don’t do great mortification without counseling first with your confessor/spiritual director. This is very important! Also, mortification should never harm physical or psychological health.

Honestly, after 5-6 months of fighting and falling, only one thing was useful for me to get rid of this sin, and that was cilice. It really helped. But I think that other less extreme means should first be tried. It was the last thing I tried, after I felt all other means were exhausted and lust was still very strong and even growing. Cilice should definitely be used only with permission of a prudent spiritual director (if not it could cause pride and harm physical/psychological health), and it should never be used in a way that would damage health. So I’m not here recommending you this mean of mortification, just sharing my experience. To me, it really helped, to someone else it would maybe do more harm than good. It depends on a person.
 
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Even i spare time - some people studying languages , and some are engaged in sports, especially the combat sports.
Many titled athletes simply do not have time for dating, but before they reach good results.
Everything has its time. In our era, only acquiring a profession and maturing financially, will be the good time to get married, but until this time, you need to be constantly productively engaged in something useful.
 
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Quote: This is because if I get married, I will need to take care of my wife and my children (if any), and support the family, and will be less free. Is my thought too self-centred?

It is a thought that shows you are wholly unprepared to think of marriage, but that’s okay. Right now you are the perfect age to study, to travel, and to earn a nest egg of money. Those are the things to focus on.

Right now, your happiness depends on yourself. But later, you will see you are happiest when the people around you are happy. So you will not think of taking care of people as an imposition, but rather as a gift. You will be happy you have the strength, intelligence, finances to be helpful to somebody else. Be glad you’re not ill, except for the mental illness of addiction to a false god, namely sexual sin.
 
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One of the ends of marriage is as a remedy to concupiscence, however, that is not the only end of marriage.

We tend to downplay this end, tell people they need to have a nice chunk of savings and own a home and have stored up worldly possessions before marriage. It is sad that we have lost sight that marriage is not to be limited to the financially successful or those in the right career or those with a certain degree.

https://w2.vatican.va/content/pius-...ents/hf_p-xi_enc_19301231_casti-connubii.html

http://www.newadvent.org/summa/5042.htm
 
TheLittleLady said:
One of the ends of marriage is as a remedy to concupiscence, however, that is not the only end of marriage.

We tend to downplay this end, tell people they need to have a nice chunk of savings and own a home and have stored up worldly possessions before marriage. It is sad that we have lost sight that marriage is not to be limited to the financially successful or those in the right career or those with a certain degree.
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This is true. But the primary end of marriage is as a means to raise children and for the good of the spouses. Their road to heaven basically.

I certainly don’t think life should be sorted before you walk down the aisle. If I did I wouldn’t be married. But certainly you should have a degree of self mastery and control before considering marriage.
 
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