In-Vitro Family Members

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Carm

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Greetings,

My husband’s brother and his wife are beginning in-vitro procedures. (Our family is the only Catholic one in the extended one…)

While everyone stands around talking about it (ugh) I just sit there and pray. Anyway, my questions is - what should be my attitude toward the baby when they do conceive? Obviously, not the baby’s fault so I will love that child… should I just avoid the “how” it came about but get excited for the coming birth? Seems contradictory to me…

Carm
 
That’s about all you can do–pray and love the child.

These new technologies make me wince. Especially the in-vitro conception using donor eggs for a post-menopausal woman and then the “extra” embryos are frozen and defrosted and implanted years later for a second child. :bigyikes: When a woman was telling about her saga to allow her to have a second family (adult children and a new husband) at 51 years old, I suddenly agreed 100 percent with the Church’s teaching on life and assisted fertility.
 
Treat it like you’d treat any other human being. That seems so obvious…
 
Love this little Angel as you would any naturally conceived little Angel.:yup:.
 
You should love the child and not treat it any different than any other child! What is so contradictory? Plenty of babies are concieved, in a manner that God did not intend…premarital sex. Of course you would not be happy for someone who is trying to get pregnant without being married, you wouldn’t approve, I think praying for the people is appropriate, just as you are praying for the couple attempting invitro. And you should pray for the baby if one is born, he/she will need those prayers when the parents do tell them how they were concieved. God is the author of life, if they concieve through invitro, God has made that life, he/she was made in God’s image just like any other baby.
FWIW, Dh and I did in-vitro, successfully, before we even gave any thought to what the Catholic church taught. God showed me in a very loving way the errors of in-vitro(about the time the kids turned 5), but also, that the children concieved were not wrong. He makes good out of bad, the “way” was wrong, the good are the children. I have yet to meet anyone who has done in-vitro to understand it is wrong, they seem to think their kids are “wrong” if they admit it.
So, please pray for all who have done in-vitro, and their children!
Dawn
 
Treat the baby the same way you would want to be treated… pray for the babies parents… anyone can use a little help, but try to stop at the judgement door… that spot is reserved… peace 👍
 
I too was thinking about this. My very good friend who is a practicing catholic, is thinking about doing this because she can not have kids. Thanks to this thread I now know. Of course this is my conclusion HATE THE SIN NOT THE SINNER! Actually some people dont think it is a sin to get invitro…even though they are “Catholic”. Just because a child is concieved in sin, doesnt mean the child is a sin…my thing is, is it my duty as a fellow catholic to tell her that invitro is a sin according to the Church?
 
I could never NOT LOVE THAT BABY, nor could I NOT LOVE THE PARENTS… I was worried about the sharing in the excitement preceding the birth. It is likely that I will just be able to avoid the topic of “how” the life came into being and be happy for the fact that it did! Thanks!

PS I understand conversion- I used to contracept as most Catholics my age have and I know my kids and all kids are still gifts from God… Thanks for reminding me, though
 
what should be my attitude toward the baby when they do conceive?
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No baby is conceived without God willing it. Love the baby with all your heart.

I have good friends who are doing the same thing. I let them know what the Church teaches. I can be joyful for them without agreeing to their practice. Just as with all my non-Catholic friends and family, who act contrary to my beliefs, and continue to reject my beliefs. I figure they are still my loved ones, and God’s not done with them yet. 😉
 
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crazyage3:
… My very good friend who is a practicing catholic, is thinking about doing this because she can not have kids. … is it my duty as a fellow catholic to tell her that invitro is a sin according to the Church?
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I think the answer to this is “Yes”, we are our brothers keeper, so you are required to tell her the teachings of the Church on this.

I suggest you do your homework before you do so. Take the time to read the CCC, starting with paragraphs 2373 - 2379. Look to other writings by Faithful Catholics, explaining why they have come to accept this teaching of the Church. Perhaps read Theology of the Body, by Pope John Paul II, or “Theology of the Body Explained”. Pope JPII is excellent at explaining why the Church’s teachings are for the ultimate good of the couple.

When you approach your friend, make certain you lead with Love. The primary message that comes through needs to be that you love your friend and feel for the pain of their inability to have children by natural means.

Oh, BTW, my aunt was “infertile” and when they finally just “gave-up” (this was long before fertility treatments were what they are now) they took an extended trip to South America. While there she had difficulty with the strange foods (she kept getting ill) and she gained an incredible amount of weight. Yup, you guessed it, by the time they got home, she was 6 months pregnant, without having ever suspected anything.

I’m not suggesting that they just sit back and it will happen, but with God, all things are possible. He knows best. Have they tried Natural Family Planning? You may also want to get her information on that, if you know she hasn’t already explored it.

CARose
 
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