Infertility and faith

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Littleflower912

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Hello,

I was wondering if someone could offer some good advice. I am a cradle Catholic and have always believed that if you have faith in God anything is possible. I have been trying to get pregnant for the past 3.5 years with no success. And my faith is definitely taking a hit. I used to be the eternal optimist but now see myself becoming the eternal pessimist. It has put a strain on my marriage and I have seen the pain it has caused not only me but my husband and parents. How do you still keep your faith during this time of many disappointments. I am having a hard time and would appreciate some insight and prayers
 
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Have you been seen by a doctor?
The Church allows for fertility medications.

Hugs and I will remember you in my :pray:t2:❤️🙂
(PS St Gerard Majella is the patron saint for infertility)
 
i imagine that your situation is hard.

With God everything is possible, but there is never a guarantee that a couple will have a baby.

Prayers
 
Also, please remember that faith is about trusting God to lead you to the best possible place.
It’s not about “working up” a particular feeling or plastering a fake smile on your face and determinedly marching on.
It’s okay to cry, to feel angry, to be scared.
You won’t make God “mad” if you struggle with your circumstances.
Some days you’ll handle this cross with great dignity, and other times, not so much.

Be gentle with yourself.

And try to find a good Catholic support group, maybe online. And of course, come here 🙂
 
Never lose hope, my sister. I’ve always believed in divine intervention. Miracles still happen now a days. Hence, I’ll offer a prayer for you and for those who are going through the same situation as you do:

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Surrender everything to GOD and trust in Him with all your heart ❤️.

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I’ll include you in my prayer.

Just keep up the faith ! 😇😇😇
 
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My wife and I decided to let things take their natural course in 2012, and then actively started trying to get pregnant in 2013. We took temperatures, charted, etc… We were diagnosed with infertility in 2014. Then in 2018 we were blessed with a healthy pregnancy and now have a four month old daughter.

However, before that blessed news, my wife and I had come to terms with the fact that we would not have children of our own and at best would have to adopt. We didn’t have a right to children.

I don’t know what the moral of the story is, though. On the one hand I can tell you that God works on his time and that a blessing is still possible. On the other hand, as I said, we had reconciled to never having natural children, and that is the truth for some people. I cannot pretend it’s not. It doesn’t make you less of a woman or him less of a man. We have to be able to accept God’s will in our lives, even when it hurts. It provides us with opportunities to do other things instead, charity, to be great aunts and uncles, to adopt…

You are in my prayers, along with all couples dealing with infertility.

(I noted that in 2012 we decided to let nature take its natural course, implying that before we had not. This was before my wife and I became practicing Catholics)
 
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It’s one of the hardest things to go through faith wise. But if you let it it brings you closer to God and each other if you can get through it and start having acceptance of the situation as far as what you can do as far as loving each other and offering that hole in your heart to God. Everyone’s situation is unique but I know so many couple that decided to foster care, and or adopt and then they get pregnant unexpectedly. It’s loke once you let go and let God then he will bless you either way.
 
God is God. We are not. We can and should ask but God decided and we are thankful for His attention to our concern. It took us five years to get pregnant and I think God waited for me to surrender. It was worth waiting for!
 
My husband and I married 13 years ago. Discovering, as a 24 yo young wife, that I was unable to bear children was one of the most difficult times of my life (we had wanted a big family).

There was a moment when nothing seemed to make sense. We had so much wanted to have that picture-perfect Christian family, our parents were hurting too, all our friends were having babies. It was so hard, and I was so angry with God.

With time, I came to accept this for my own life : that being a mother is not limited to biological or even adoptive parenthood. There is spiritual motherhood too (in all the meanings of that word). There is also being as good an aunt and godmother as I can be.

To be honest, 13 years later, there is one thing I still struggle with, and it is the perspective of growing old alone (my husband is 10 years older than me).

In the end, for me, it is all about accepting God’s will for me as the best thing which could happen to me, and which will happen to me. It is an ongoing process, with times of pain and times of deep peace and contentment.

I will pray for you.
 
Hello Littleflower912,
I am going through the same thing you are. I’m a cradle Catholic as well and from a big family of 5 kids. I don’t really have any really good advice but wanted you to know there are others just like you. I’m currently reading a book called “Facing Infertility A Catholic Approach” it’s ok, but if you’re anything like me you already know and agree with all of the medical treatments that are and are not morally acceptable. What I really want is a friend to go through this with. I have my husband of course, but a woman’s perspective is different. I have not been able to find any Catholic support groups and I really don’t think I’m emotionally stable enough to create my own. If anyone knows of a truly Catholic online support group please let me know.
 
The NT says, “Blessed are the barren”.

In Jesus’s time/place, people were perpetrating much evil. To bring a child into a society like that could be no good. So it was said by him, “Blessed are the barren”.

Lots of sickos out there today too.

Hope this helps.
 
Jesus did not say “Blessed are the barren” as a good thing or a blessing. He said this to women who were crying for him during the carrying of the cross on the way to be crucified.

Luke 23:29 28 But [Jesus] turned to them and said, 'Daughters of Jerusalem, do not weep for me; weep rather for yourselves and for your children.
29 For look, the days are surely coming when people [will] say, “Blessed are those who are barren, the wombs that have never borne children, the breasts that have never suckled!”

30 Then they begin to say to the mountains, “Fall on us!”; to the hills, “Cover us!”

31 For if this is what is done to green wood, what [will] be done when the wood is dry?’
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Yes there are many people today that think its a good thing if you can’t have kids I work with some of them. This is a sign that we are living in end times. He’s not talking about an actual blessing.
 
I can’t say I agree with your analysis.

In the OT, it says that the eunuch will receive a blessing.

The barren will receive their reward.
 
Thank you for this response. Sometimes it feels like you’re completely alone in this because no one around me is facing the same challenge. I will keep you in my prayers. Please feel free to keep in touch. And yes I am aware of all the treatments that are morally available also.
 
Littleflower912 said:
Sometimes it feels like you’re completely alone in this because no one around me is facing the same challenge.
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Oh, please never think that.
There’s lots of people going through this, but as you can relate, it can be awkward to talk about it and a lot of people suffer in silence.
Hugs and I remembered you in my prayers :pray:t2:❤️🙂
 
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