Interfaith Relationships

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Margarita

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Hello,

I am hoping for some advice. I have been seeing a guy for quite sometime. When we started dating we were going to the same church, since then his family have become born-again Christians (they were previously Catholic). He has not be re-baptised, but attends service with them weekly. What should I do? He says he doesn’t want to chose a religion, and doesn’t like how the Catholic church doesn’t offer fellowship like his family’s new church does. I’ve prayed a lot about this, but don’t know how to handle it. Should I continue to date him, do interfaith relationships work? Should we stop dating?
Thanks.
 
Rather than worry about the religious differences why not look at the values? Obviously at one point he had values you found acceptable. Have they changed significantly (I mean other than which church he drives to on sunday)? Are the changes ones that will be problematic for you? Is he likely to change in ways that you believe will be problematic for you?
 
I disagree. Values is not the only thing that matters. If this relationship matures even more and you decide to marry, then what? What church do you get married in?
What church do you attend as a couple?
What church do you raise your children in?

My advice is to continue praying. God will answer your prayers and He will make it clear as to what is the right path for you to follow.
What does your boyfriend think of it? Does he think it is an issue that you attend different churches?

God Bless,
Elizabeth
 
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Margarita:
Hello,

I am hoping for some advice. I have been seeing a guy for quite sometime. When we started dating we were going to the same church, since then his family have become born-again Christians (they were previously Catholic). He has not be re-baptised, but attends service with them weekly. What should I do? He says he doesn’t want to chose a religion, and doesn’t like how the Catholic church doesn’t offer fellowship like his family’s new church does. I’ve prayed a lot about this, but don’t know how to handle it. Should I continue to date him, do interfaith relationships work? Should we stop dating?
Thanks.
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You asked for advice, so don’t get mad when I give you some.
  1. Your young man went to your church at first,huh? He was NOT a true Catholic. He was not well trained in the Roman Catholic Church.
  2. If he would leave the Catholic Church so he could get some pats on the back at the Evangelical Church HE PUTS THE FELLOWSHIP ABOVE THE CHURCH THAT JESUS STARTED, then he is an uninformed person - he just doesnt know very much.
  3. I will tell you I had two friends enter a MIXED MARRIAGE and both were divvirced before 7 years. Aand they are bitter now.
  4. You need to learn more of the Catholic Church, please use the same Catechism that I did. Here it is. It is Great.
    cin.org/users/james/ebooks/master/baltimore/bindex.htm
 
I find it very hard to swallow that “no fellowship” excuse for leaving the Catholic Church. that would mean the person belonged to a parish that never had a parish picnic, potluck supper, fall festival, scouts, mission trips, bingo, parent’s night, men’s club, altar and rosary society for ladies, prayer circles, CCD for kids, teens and parents, parish missions, bible studies, MOMS groups, cenacles, STS Anne & Joachim group for seniors, visiting the sick group, St Vincent and other ministries and community outreach – activities that nearly every parish has in place. It would mean that every year in October on Stewardship Sunday, when asked to commit their time and talent to serving the parish, the community and the poor, they said NO.

It also means they have no conception of the Real Presence of Jesus in the Eucharist the sacrament that effects our unity, and from which all Christian relationship and fellowship flows.
 
Hi. I haven’t yet figured out how to cut and paste from previous posts to indicate such. Anyhow, someone else was in a similar predicament as you and posted a similar query a few weeks ago-my advice remains basically the same (but since your significant other was raised in the Catholic Church, RCIA isn’t applicable but y’all could still go to the Inquiry classes):

Re: Need Relationship Advice
I can definitely empathize. I have recently ended a 3 year relationship with a wonderful, devout Southern Baptist, with whom I thought I would spend the rest of my life. Unfortunately, we could never move forward in our relationship because of our religious differences. Like most Protestants, he did not believe in Tradition, the Papacy, the Eucharist, Marian devotion, justification by good works, community of Saints, etc…Please don’t be like me and think that this is going to somehow miraculously resolve itself. Prayers are crucial; and I definitely prayed and continue to pray that the Lord will open our hearts and minds to see the Truth; but looking back, I wish that I had been more open to discussing these issues. I was always hesitant because I felt that no matter what my defense was, my boyfriend believed what he believed and was not ready to accept the Truth. Get ready- these discussions can be uncomfortable and may become heated, but you two need to definitely talk it out. It may be easier since it sounds like your boyfriend isn’t a practicing Baptist and may not be “set in his ways”. RCIA is a good idea, but you may want to see if your church offers an Inquiry class which might be more suitable for your boyfriend to go and ask questions about the Catholic faith or you two may want to sit down with a Priest. Some churches also offer pre-engagement encounters. I think this is a great website for him to pose his questions and concerns. There are may books out there that he can read, but I think the most important things are that you two pray, talk, and listen. God bless.
 
Hi Margarita,

As a woman married to a Jewish man for 32 years, let me just say “beware”. Having been married for such a long time, I’ve had the benefit of growing up with him, raising our awesome children together, going through lots of challenges, etc.

While I love him dearly and feel we’ve been blessed by God’s most precious children (Catholic, btw), there is an aching hole in one, very important regard…not sharing a spiritual intimacy - and that is not easy.

Of course I pray daily for his conversion. There have been times in our relationship (mostly at the very beginning) when faith wasn’t much of an issue for either of us - but we do grow and things change over time.

Proceed with caution…
 
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Margarita:
Hello,

I am hoping for some advice. I have been seeing a guy for quite sometime. When we started dating we were going to the same church, since then his family have become born-again Christians (they were previously Catholic). He has not be re-baptised, but attends service with them weekly. What should I do? He says he doesn’t want to chose a religion, and doesn’t like how the Catholic church doesn’t offer fellowship like his family’s new church does. I’ve prayed a lot about this, but don’t know how to handle it. Should I continue to date him, do interfaith relationships work? Should we stop dating?
Thanks.
Click to expand...
My husband grew up going to various protestant religions. When his mom and sister decided to join the Lutheran Church, he was intersted until he realized that they didn’t believe in the True Presence of the Eucharist, which he felt Scripture led to and when he realized that the Catholic Church believe in transubstantiation, he was on board. We started dating in highschool. he was two grades ahead of me and chose a Catholic College because he thought I would like to go there too. He was right. When we decided to get married, I assumed he would convert to Catholocism, but being in the military he just wanted to hurry is along. We went through Pre-Cana and he planned to go through RCIA after we were married. Here we are, at our 10 year anniversary. His dog tags say “Catholic,” he goes to Mass regualrly with me, we are a committed Catholic homeschool family, he considers himself Catholic, but HAS NEVER CONVERTED! I have tried being patient, but that protestant individuality has strong roots. Unfortuantely, the decon who married us was impressed with his unwaivering belief in the True Presence in the Eucharist so he told my husband he could take Communion, just dont’ say anything to the priest… so he was given false permission to “be Catholic” without needing to “become officially Catholic.” So here I am, and I pray about it all the time. I am patient, but good grief, I just want him to commit and do it already! He always says "Do you know any “official” Catholic who is more Catholic than me. I belive in the Catholic Church 100% or he says “When would I do RCIA with my schedule?”

If this situation is hard for me, I can’t imagine being married to someone who doesn’t even want to be Catholic. Your Catholic faith will be even more important to you when you have children, and you need to be with someone who is on the same page. If you are even considering breaking off the relationship, I would follow those instincts. If it was meant to be you wouldn’t even consider breaking up with him. Ask God to let His will be done, make sure you let God lead you rather than putting your own will above His. God may very well have a better plan for you, there may be a better husband for you, or your current boyfriend may need time apart to mature and you might end up together years later. Let God lead you. I would tell him “I love you but my Catholic faith is my great treasure and I will never turn away from the Body of Christ. I want to marry a man who is committed to being Catholic.”
 
Hi my name is Elena and i just wanted to add that i too am in a relationship with a man who is of non-denomination. We are at the point where are relationship can not move forward because i am Catholic and he is not. Its really sad that this has to happen, and just because we don’t have the same beliefs we may not be together. I have prayed and will continue to pray for our relationship and will leave it in the hands of GOD to see if he is the man for me or not. I have read the rest of the comments and suggestions and let me just say they have helped. I am just so confused at times. I really don’t know what else to do. My boyfriend says that what he likes about his church is the loud praise and worship they have, he has attended Mass with me and says that it wasn’t as exciting and he didn’t like it. He felt that he didn’t learn as much as he does when he goes to his church. I asked him what exactly it is about the catholic church he doesn’t like and he always says the same thing that the Catholic church has to many laws and is to structured. I just don’t get him…i try to answer as many questions as he asks me but sometimes i just don’thave the answers. I guess what i need is any advice you think will help me. Or just pray for me please…thanks.
 
Margarita said:
Hello,

I am hoping for some advice. I have been seeing a guy for quite sometime. When we started dating we were going to the same church, since then his family have become born-again Christians (they were previously Catholic). He has not be re-baptised, but attends service with them weekly. What should I do? He says he doesn’t want to chose a religion, and doesn’t like how the Catholic church doesn’t offer fellowship like his family’s new church does. I’ve prayed a lot about this, but don’t know how to handle it. Should I continue to date him, do interfaith relationships work? Should we stop dating?
Thanks.
Click to expand...
Marriage to a man who cannot and will not be a Catholic husband and father is a mistake.

You have your future children to consider-- the purpose of the Sacrament of Marriage and the role of the Catholic family is to raise up saints and to assist your spouse in attaining heaven.

Be not unequally yoked. Break it off now, or you are in for a lifetime of heartache.
 
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