Is bringing mom to mass a bad idea?

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confusedgirl

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Before I start, my mom will never convert to Catholicism despite its really all she ever wants in a church. Seriously one day she came home said she doesn’t believe there will be a universal and multicultural church that stays together and agrees on everything. facepalm But I’m not trying to convert my mom she seems pretty rooted in her beliefs.

My issue is what if I get married? If I ever do get married it will be in the Catholic faith I’m not willing to compromise on that at all. My mom doesn’t seem like the type to behave properly mass. I’ve never been with her but I’ve been to other churches with her. Mainly Protestant but my mom makes sure that when she’s in church she sings very loudly, dances, prays outpouring (very loudly) and what ever other showy things she does in church. And I think at her church that’s totally fine because I guess in her church that is the norm.

But what am I supposed to do? Not invite her? What if have children? I’m going to have them baptized and my mom criticized the way Catholics baptize their children. If she does decide to come I’m a little hesitant since I’m worried that she will act very showy by dancing around clapping singing and disturbing everyone around her. On the other hand I don’t want to say she can’t come because I think she’s going to act a certain way.

Marriage and child birth are quite far a way, at least for me (only 18) but I’m going to be leaving over the summer and if im visiting over christmas I do have obligations and I do take that very seriously. If she says I’m not allowed to practice my faith while I’m visiting that is a serious problem for me. If I invite her I’m just concerned about being a disturbance.
 
You should bring her to the Mass. Jesus should be shown to all people don’t you think
 
Maybe like you said she just sings loudly and dances because others in her church do this. Hopefully at a mass she’d be able to read the situation and gauge that it’s best to be quieter.

It could be worse - at least she’s a practising Christian. Everyone in my family thinks religion is nonsense 😊
 
confusedgirl said:
Before I start, my mom will never convert to Catholicism despite its really all she ever wants in a church. Seriously one day she came home said she doesn’t believe there will be a universal and multicultural church that stays together and agrees on everything. facepalm But I’m not trying to convert my mom she seems pretty rooted in her beliefs.

My issue is what if I get married? If I ever do get married it will be in the Catholic faith I’m not willing to compromise on that at all. My mom doesn’t seem like the type to behave properly mass. I’ve never been with her but I’ve been to other churches with her. Mainly Protestant but my mom makes sure that when she’s in church she sings very loudly, dances, prays outpouring (very loudly) and what ever other showy things she does in church. And I think at her church that’s totally fine because I guess in her church that is the norm.

But what am I supposed to do? Not invite her? What if have children? I’m going to have them baptized and my mom criticized the way Catholics baptize their children. If she does decide to come I’m a little hesitant since I’m worried that she will act very showy by dancing around clapping singing and disturbing everyone around her. On the other hand I don’t want to say she can’t come because I think she’s going to act a certain way.

Marriage and child birth are quite far a way, at least for me (only 18) but I’m going to be leaving over the summer and if im visiting over christmas I do have obligations and I do take that very seriously. If she says I’m not allowed to practice my faith while I’m visiting that is a serious problem for me. If I invite her I’m just concerned about being a disturbance.
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Personally, I think that if your mother shouts and dances at a Catholic Mass it will be very good for her and for the Catholics alike. I don’t see a problem.

Edwin
 
SpidersfromMars said:
Maybe like you said she just sings loudly and dances because others in her church do this. Hopefully at a mass she’d be able to read the situation and gauge that it’s best to be quieter.
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Why? If exuberance is her way of responding to the presence of God in the purely spiritual form available in Protestant churches, wouldn’t it be appropriate to be even more exuberant in the presence of the Eucharist?😉

Edwin
 
Contarini said:
Personally, I think that if your mother shouts and dances at a Catholic Mass it will be very good for her and for the Catholics alike. I don’t see a problem.

Edwin
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You sayin’ Catholics need an “amen corner” for the priest’s homily?
😃
 
JustaServant said:
You sayin’ Catholics need an “amen corner” for the priest’s homily?
😃
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It would probably not need to be used very often, given the quality of most Catholic preaching. Perhaps more appropriate in many cases would be “Help him, Lord.”

But the Eucharistic Prayer surely is worth a few loud “hallelujahs,” whatever the quality of the preaching.

After all, there is something called the “Great Amen” at the end!

Edwin
 
It is just a matter of group dynamics, I doubt the mother will go to a Mass and be the only person acting as if it was a Pentecostal tent revival. very few people are that self centered. After all even if she was anti-Catholic to an extreme and raised in a non liturgical tradition odds are she has at least visited a high church before.
 
You are worrying about many things which may or may not happen–a good trick of Satan’s! What I try to do is to pray whenever I start to worry or fret; if I am owrried about a person, I pray for them. Don’t pray that your mother would behave appropriately, just pray for her spiritual health.
 
My mom’s personality is similar in a lot of ways (we bump heads a lot – mainly due to personality mismatches). Invite her. As I say that, I’ll make sure to invite my mom as well. She attends a Salvation Army type church (which I have no issue with). I am 44 and my mom embarrasses me always. 😃
 
I have been told this a lot and i feel that it will ring true.

Once you decide to get married and be maried, its not her position anymore to dictate on how you want your children to be raised. She can give advice, but not judge.

And from the looks of it, your mom will not go down without a fight. So go ahead and invite her to Christmas vigil! that will be the best experience ever…I pray that God will give you strength and courage.

“Pray, Hope and Don’t worry”-St. Pio of Pietrelchina
 
confusedgirl said:
My issue is what if I get married?

My mom doesn’t seem like the type to behave properly mass.

when she’s in church she sings very loudly, dances, prays outpouring (very loudly)

But what am I supposed to do? Not invite her? What if have children?..I’m worried that she will act very showy by dancing around clapping singing and disturbing everyone around her.

me (only 18)

if im visiting over christmas I do have obligations and I do take that very seriously. If she says I’m not allowed to practice my faith while I’m visiting that is a serious problem for me. If I invite her I’m just concerned about being a disturbance.
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Congratulations on your journey to the Church.

You are obsessing over things that are not even here today. If this is a typical way you spend your time, worrying about things which are only “what ifs” about life, maybe you can learn to re-direct all that stress to knowing there is no reason to become so concern about the world of “what ifs”.

Please invite your mom to Mass any Sunday and don’t worry about your mom expressing herself in Mass. If she sings loud that’s okay. I highly doubt she will move into the center aisle and begin to dance. If she claps loudly, accept it as your mother’s way of expressing herself.

Chances are your mom expresses herself based on the environment of the time and place - more expressive in a church service where the norm is to be more expressive.

When you marry, hopefully you will have already invited her to many Masses with you and your wedding Mass will not be her first exposure to Mass.

She may always have concerns for Catholic baptism of infants, but you will still want to invite her the important events of your children in their faith. If she accepts the invitation to attend their import faith events, she most likely will do so with respect of the event. If she claps loudly, be accepting that it is her way of expressing joy.

While she may attend a grandchild’s baptism, she may still view the beliefs as opposed to her own religious beliefs.

Many Catholic children have Protestant grandparents. Some of these grandparents are involved in the Catholic religious events of their grandchildren’s life, others choose to be in the grandchild’s life while stepping back from their religious events.

Enjoy today. Don’t focus on all the “what ifs” of having a Catholic faith life while your mother is Protestant. (Your mom might enjoy attending a Charismatic Catholic Mass one day.)
 
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