H
Heidi_Jaramillo
Guest
Dear Father,
Thank you for taking time to help me. I am searching for some answers in the Catholic faith. I was raised by an atheist and an agnostic. I have lived a fairly good/loving life despite confusing guidance. I have a voice telling me right from wrong, but it has conflicted with my parents and my husband many times. I have had trouble deciding who to listen to. Who to obey. Now I know I should listen to God.
I have sinned many times and wish to atone. I know most sins I have committed. I confess them to God and ask forgiveness. I want to be a better person.
I am confused on one issue. My first marriage…I was married in a Methodist Church in front of God. I totally committed my life to my husband and children and community. When I became pregnant with our third child, to my shock and horror, my husband asked me to abort it. I went to a clinic, and could not do it. Then he hounded me for a month, and I ended up doing it. I regret it, mourn it, feel ashamed… I can’t really express my guilt and sorrow. I choose wrong. I now know it is a mortal sin. I may never be forgiven. It is what I deserve…I take full responsibility. I did have a choice.
At the time I did it, I felt like I was choosing between what my husband wanted me to do and my unborn child. I loved that child with all my heart. I could not understand my husband, but did not know how to refuse him. I sacrificed our unborn baby… Years later, I asked my husband to leave. I divorced him. I just could not live with the choices I was forced to make with him. I felt I needed to protect myself and my two children from his influence… I know what I did was a sin. Was divorcing him also a sin?
Thank you for your help,
Heidi
Thank you for taking time to help me. I am searching for some answers in the Catholic faith. I was raised by an atheist and an agnostic. I have lived a fairly good/loving life despite confusing guidance. I have a voice telling me right from wrong, but it has conflicted with my parents and my husband many times. I have had trouble deciding who to listen to. Who to obey. Now I know I should listen to God.
I have sinned many times and wish to atone. I know most sins I have committed. I confess them to God and ask forgiveness. I want to be a better person.
I am confused on one issue. My first marriage…I was married in a Methodist Church in front of God. I totally committed my life to my husband and children and community. When I became pregnant with our third child, to my shock and horror, my husband asked me to abort it. I went to a clinic, and could not do it. Then he hounded me for a month, and I ended up doing it. I regret it, mourn it, feel ashamed… I can’t really express my guilt and sorrow. I choose wrong. I now know it is a mortal sin. I may never be forgiven. It is what I deserve…I take full responsibility. I did have a choice.
At the time I did it, I felt like I was choosing between what my husband wanted me to do and my unborn child. I loved that child with all my heart. I could not understand my husband, but did not know how to refuse him. I sacrificed our unborn baby… Years later, I asked my husband to leave. I divorced him. I just could not live with the choices I was forced to make with him. I felt I needed to protect myself and my two children from his influence… I know what I did was a sin. Was divorcing him also a sin?
Thank you for your help,
Heidi