Is gift-giving at Christmas appropriate to a non-believer?

[TJS1967]

My daughter, who is 15-years-old, has recently announced that she no longer believes in God. I am a practicing Catholic and her father is a non-practicing Lutheran. I feel that we should not be giving Christmas presents to her if she no longer believes in God. She tells us that there is no proof that there is a God and that it is all made up. At her age it is very difficult to talk to her. She has an attitude and is self-focused. I look forward to your help in this situation.

 

[Michelle_Arnold]

To answer the general hypothetical question, there is nothing wrong with giving Christmas gifts to a non-believer, especially to one who otherwise celebrates Christmas. To answer your concrete dilemma, it depends on your motivations and whether you can pull it off without making the situation worse. If you are looking for leverage over your daughter, I can only recommend consulting with a counselor, such as those at the Catholic counseling apostolate, the Pastoral Solutions Institute. If, on the other hand, you merely want to point out to her the illogic of her position and the natural consequences of her belief, and you can do it in a neutral way, you could say:

“Well, honey, if you don’t believe in God, then you must not believe in Christ. If you don’t believe in Christ, then there is no reason why you would be celebrating Christmas. If that is the case, then I guess we won’t be getting you that iPod [or other desperately longed-for item] after all. Instead, I think I’ll give the money we would have spent on you to a family charity in your name, perhaps Heifer International, where the children who receive help from the charity know God exists and are grateful for his bounty.”

Keep in mind that this should not be an idle threat, but something with which you are fully prepared to follow through.