Is it a sin if your parents force you to tell them your sins that you confessed during confession?

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melvfe

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I am so conflicted here…

On the one hand, I am extremely bad at lying to or not answering my parents when they try to extract the truth from me. Yet on the other hand, I don’t want to disobey them right after my confession ends.

I don’t know what to do…

(I’m above the legal age of 21, but I’m disabled so I’ve to live with my parents.)
 
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Your parents have no right to ask you what you confessed. As you are of age, you no longer owe them your obedience, and they should not demand it of you.

I’m so sorry you’re in this situation. Could you speak with your Priest and see what he advises?

Perhaps therapy would help you to set boundaries with your parents. Certainly they shouldn’t treat you as though you are still a child. Is there any available help to you if you wanted greater independence?
 
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The last time I asked a priest, he said and did nothing about it, except a sigh of pity… 😦 Not sure if the confessor (different priest) whom I’ll be seeing tomorrow will be more friendly.
 
TBH, your parents sound extremely controlling if they are doing that. Is there a friend you can live with instead? Is there anyone you can go to to look into other living options for disabled people?

Just because you’re disabled, it does not mean you have to put up with abuse.
 
I talked to a social worker about this, and he said that the living options are not suitable for my earning abilities, so I’d have to wait to be financially independent before I can move out. 😦 My friends are also not willing to let me stay with them. 😦
 
Sorry to hear that. But, tell your parents that they have no right to this information and, if anything, THEY are sinning for disregarding the seal of confession.

EDIT: Also, we’ll pray you will reach financial independence soon.
 
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melvfe said:
I talked to a social worker about this, and he said that the living options are not suitable for my earning abilities, so I’d have to wait to be financially independent before I can move out.
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Is there any aid available to you? Could you ask again to make sure there is nothing suitable?

Please do talk to your confessor tomorrow. I hope he will be able to help you.
 
Make sure to make the right distinctions. If your parents want to know what bad things you have been doing recently for a reasonable motive, they could have a good claim on you. What is inexcusable is the desire to know the content of your confession as such.
 
If you are in the US, there are programs to help you live independently.
 
They do!! They used to ask for my sins before I go for confession when I was a young kid, so i thought it was okay, but now I realized that it’s not ok… 😦
 
That’s just odd. At least you know what NOT to do if you ever have a family, lol!

I emphasize the Seal of the Confessional to my kids so that they feel they can confess their sins freely to the priest.
 
You can ask them if they will grant you absolution. What is the point of confessing your sins if you cannot receive absolution for them? Then say that you lied to your parents, and that you exposed their sins to the priest in the confessional. Then, assume a very confidential tone and say: “Do you know that serial killer who went around years ago and was never caught? That was I!”

Seriously, if you take a flippant and humorous approach to it, it may lessen what seems to be harsh disciplinarianism on their part. They have no right to the truth, so if you embellish it, conceal it, or pepper it with falsehoods without an intent to deceive, then you have done no wrong.
 
blackforest said:
That’s just odd. At least you know what NOT to do if you ever have a family, lol!
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To give the parents the benefit of the doubt, their hearts may be in the right place. If OP is disabled and dependent on others, they may be especially protective of him/her and want to make sure there isn’t some situation in which they need to intervene.

Don’t get me wrong; what they’re doing is not right. But it’s probably not malicious.
 
“Mom and dad, I appreciate your concern, but I do not need to confess my sins to you, only to a priest, who stands in place of Jesus.”

And then just refuse to divulge your sins to them. That is all.
 
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