Is it a sin to be friends with a non-believer?

[GodsGift]

I have a few “friends” who i talk to, and get along with that are non-believers… when I myself am a believer of the catholic religion, god, jesus christ & the saints. I was wondering if it is a sin to have a relationship with non-believers? Please let me know… It’s really hard giving up some people, but if it has to do with me being unfaithful I’ll do it.

 

[Starwynd]

Let’s see… Jesus was friends with tax collectors and prostitutes so why should you be a sinner if you’re a friend to those who don’t believe?

 

[Highwayhound]

Let’s see… Jesus was friends with tax collectors and prostitutes so why should you be a sinner if you’re a friend to those who don’t believe?

The above examples are what came to my mind.

I would add the following question:

What is the state of your faith? Is it strong or weak? If you are well grounded in your faith then it is possible for you to have a positive effect on your friends. If it is weak then perhaps you will be in situations where you might sin. Think about it, talk it over with parents, siblings, a priest, and last but not least Jesus. People that you trust will help.

God bless

 

[Oscarthecat]

I don’t think that it is a sin in and of itself-

But it could be an occasion for sin…particularly if your find yourself in a position to even imply approval of things your friends do which are contrary to catholic teaching.

On the other hand, it could be an occasion for grace, as you might help them to reconsider some of their beliefs.

In any event, it can be hard for friends to respect one another’s right to hold different beliefs or values, but not to give tacit approval of those beliefs or values.

 

[MomblessedX3]

My daughter asked me a question similar to this. I told her that she should be friends with people who don’t believe. If she lives her life Christ-like it will do more to teach them about the God than spouting off a bunch of scripture or activley trying to convert them.
It is not a sin to be friends of non-believers. God doesn’t want us to judge others but to live our beliefs by our actions. We are supposed to tell others about Christ and that can be done without words. Which leads me to believe that being friends with non-believers is something we should all do.

jmho

 

[Oscarthecat]

Let’s see… Jesus was friends with tax collectors and prostitutes so why should you be a sinner if you’re a friend to those who don’t believe?

I agree that we can, and in some cases we really should, be friends with non-catholics.

But I’ve always struggled with this reference as a justification of this…

From what I understand, Jesus’ primary role in those relationships was to bring those people to faith in Him- it seems that indications of “friendship” took place AFTER they were converted.

Was He really “friends” with anyone who didn’t believe in Him? Some people mention Nicodemus as someone who maintained an ongoing relationship with Jesus before converting- but based on their conversation, Jesus wasn’t particularly “friendly” with Nicodemus…He was actually pretty critical of him.

Also, He was pretty clear that we shouldn’t associate with those people that reject our faith…shaking off the dirt of towns that refused to convert, for example, doesn’t seem to friendly.

 

[Geremia]

I have a few “friends” who i talk to, and get along with that are non-believers… when I myself am a believer of the catholic religion, god, jesus christ & the saints. I was wondering if it is a sin to have a relationship with non-believers?

Not unless the friendship weakens your relationship with God

 

[Blade_and_Blood]

No, it’s not a sin. You can have any friends you want, really… so long as they’re not completely bad influences, believer or not. Just hold on to your faith as tightly as possible.

Ironically Yours, Blade and Blood

 

[goofyjim]

Only if they are a source of temptation. St. Paul says we must still live in the world just not of the world.

 

[Geremia]

Chapters 17 and 19 of St. Francis de Sales’s Introduction to the Devout Life discusses friendship and which friendships are good and bad.

 

[feargalmac]

It’s not a sin. Anyway, by your example they may become believers, just be careful your not led astray.

 

[metalkid43]

It is a sin, however, it is only a venial sin. If you pay your indulgences, you should be able to avoid any temporal punishment in hell.

 

[Gottle_of_Geer]

I agree that we can, and in some cases we really should, be friends with non-catholics.

But I’ve always struggled with this reference as a justification of this…

From what I understand, Jesus’ primary role in those relationships was to bring those people to faith in Him- it seems that indications of “friendship” took place AFTER they were converted.

Was He really “friends” with anyone who didn’t believe in Him? Some people mention Nicodemus as someone who maintained an ongoing relationship with Jesus before converting- but based on their conversation, Jesus wasn’t particularly “friendly” with Nicodemus…He was actually pretty critical of him.

That makes Him sound like the worst kind of Christian - the sort who does not care for people as people, as individual human beings: but views them only as “scalps”, as “conversion-fodder”. That is not love - it’s manipulation, using people; treating them as things. That is not friendship, which is a manifestation of love: it’s a sham, a fake version of a love which is not interested in others at all.​

The example of St. Philip Neri is far more attractive, because infinitely more Christian. He was Apostle of Rome, not because he used people, but because he had a gift for friendship, which was supernaturalised, so that it became a means of Christ’s Love. That is nothing like the deceitfulness of the “friendship” of those who show a pretence of love, without the reality of it.

Also, He was pretty clear that we shouldn’t associate with those people that reject our faith…shaking off the dirt of towns that refused to convert, for example, doesn’t seem to friendly.

The comparison doesn’t hold. If Jesus had meant us to reject people for that reason, He would not have died for us. The Cruicifixion shows what God’s Love is like - it is a totally boundless self-giving, to the point of death & beyond. If the other thing were love, Jesus would have been a Pharisee, keeping in only with His own crowd, rejecting the very people the Gospel shows Him mixing with. He would not be a Saviour, but a self-righteous prig, stinking of his own goodness, like so many “religious” people ​