Is it a sin to "lie" about Santa to your kids?

[resipsaloquitor]

I was told the truth that Santa Claus existed long ago and was generous to boys and girls because he loved Jesus…so thats why we get presents to show that giving is good.

 

[kiddleive2]

I once saw a book that had many stories of Santa, St. Nicholas, and Father Christmas from all over the world. I wanted it to read to my kid too but I can’t remember the title or author to buy it. DOes anyone know what book it is?

Dec. 6 is early enough that presants bought for other children have time to get to them if we send them that day too…

I love the tradition of St. Nicholas’s day and plan to leave small trinkets and chocolate coins (based on the money he left for a dowery among all his other generous deeds) in my kids’ shoes. Who doesn’t love another reason to get candy? My kids love the movie from CCC called The boy who would become St. Nick. I also have a book by Tasha Tudor that has an advent calendar, talks about St. nick and st. Lucia and paraphrases the Birth of Jesus from Mathew and Lukes accounts. It’s an old worn pop-up book called A Book of Christmas. ISBN 0-529-05532-5. I would also look into celebrating the traditions of Advent and Ephiphany along with Christmas and Santa Claus. As a kid I knew by age 8 that it was really my parents, but played along as I loved the legend and it is based on truth. Just like Johny Appleseed. The tooth fairy and Easter Bunny were also there in my childhood, but never taught as truth, just myth, but still celebrated with the wonder and joy of childhood. The truth has expanded into legend and therefore many things can embody the spirit of Christmas, or Easter, or other Holidays. Each family can choose their own traditions to teach their children. The gift of giving, Jesus’s birth, and being with family were emphasized above the secular cultures form of Christmas. The traditons I grew up with live longer in my memory than all the absolute truths and only serve as another way to show my own children I love them.
And in answer to the original poster. You are not lying to your kids. As long as you tell them truthfully when they ask you, they will learn the difference between legend and real life. I of course am just reaching that point with my eldest.

 

[He_Man]

The other night, I got into a discussion about Santa Claus with a fellow Catholic. He asked me how I can justify pretending there is a Santa Claus when the CCC states that it is always wrong to tell a lie and that you can never do evil, even if good comes from it. My kids still believe in Santa and I personally never gave it too much thought, but I didn’t know how to answer him. I mentioned it to some other friends and they also didn’t know how to answer it.

I then posted the question in the Ask an Apologist forum:

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=119576

I have to say that I don’t find the answer to be too convincing. While I feel that it probably isn’t a sin (and not really a lie), Michelle’s answer just doesn’t do it for me. If these figures don’t exist and we know it, then isn’t it lying if we tell our kids that they’re real? The person that I’m dealing with is not going to accept that we’re telling myths, not lying. As I said, I agree that it’s probably not a sin, I just can’t explain it well.

I’d appreciate hearing others opinions about this.

Thanks,
Gary

TO me, this line of thought borders on scurpulosity. The intent (and I am never one to fall back on the “intent” card) is not to deceive the children but bring them happiness and healthy joy.

Taken to it’s fullest extent the following are lies:

1. Fido went to doggie heaven (No he didn’t…)
2. If you eat your vegetables, you’ll grow up to be big and strong (As a statement of fact, this is a lie. The child may or may not grow up att all, and may be weak when they do. plus, it takes protein and glutamine to build real muscle, which is the cornerstone of physical strength; most vegetables a child eats are low in protein).
3. Mommy would never leave you (Mommy is in fact going to leave at some point, even if it is to go to work, out with daddy, or simply downstairs while you are sleeping. Plus, one day, she won’t be around any more.)

Is this the logical conclusion we want to take the “no lying” mantra (which is a good one mind you) to? Inb each case, you sinned, according to your friend.

 

[whatevergirl]

My husband and I told our children that Santa existed…and now, both kids are 11 and 15…and seemed to have naturally stopped believing. Cynicism at such early ages? Kidding aside, I never liked the whole Santa ‘fantasy,’ as Oprah once pointed out on one of her holiday shows, that she felt that she was a ‘bad kid,’ because Santa never visited her home, or rarely did…while other kids who she knew to be badly behaved, were showered with gifts. That always struck me, as what does one explain to a child, when Santa doesn’t come? Obviously, if a family is too poor to provide gifts for its children…a child might naturally think such a thing. So, I’m not against or for telling a child about Santa. Saint Nick was a real entity…and thus the ‘spirit’ of Christmas. Unfortunately, kids are left to believe that they can have an endless wish list, because Santa is ‘footing the bill.’ LOL

I’m kind of glad that my kids are out of that stage, where we have to pretend that someone exists who doesn’t. That may sound bah-humbugish, but it’s just the way I feel. I love Christmas, but the true meaning of it…which is about family, giving, and love…and most importantly–Christ’s birth.

 

[whatevergirl]

oops–I forgot to answer the original question…is it a ‘sin?’ I would say when we tell someone something that is not the truth–it could be considered a venial sin, in this case. The intent is not malicious…so it wouldn’t fall into the mortal sin category. But, it could be venial?

 

[He_Man]

oops–I forgot to answer the original question…is it a ‘sin?’ I would say when we tell someone something that is not the truth–it could be considered a venial sin, in this case. The intent is not malicious…so it wouldn’t fall into the mortal sin category. But, it could be venial?

Again, I have my doubts as to whether or not it is even a venial sin.

Like I said, that would make statements like “Mommy will never leave you” a venial sin. It doesn’t compute.

Either way, I wouldn’t sweat it.

 

[KCtheMommy]

Oh for Santa’s sake…really? You would take away the magic & fun that Santa entails because SOMEONE ELSE suggested you are lying to your kids?

I am with the apologist, do what you want to do. But try and not let your kids ruin it for everyone else. As for lying to your kids, we all do it at one time or another. Heck, when DH and I were locked in our room a few days ago and then got a knock with a “what are you guys doing?” – do you think we are going to tell them the truth? Uhm no, we said we were “talking.” I can’t even imagien the gross-out factor for my eight year old if we said “We are having sex honey, go away.” I’ll stick to a convenient un-truth.

I think the real sin in this situation would entail NOT telling your children that the reason for the holiday is to celebrate the BIRTH of Christ. I find it’s way too much about Santa and less about God in a lot of homes these days. To me – that’s where the sin lies. Santa is just a bonus, but one that sends kids into squeals and excitement, and just full of wonder at how one magic elf can bring presents to everyone.

My eight year old has it figured out I am sure, but she WANTS to believe so she asks logical questions. On that we’ll keep playing like she doesn’t know, and so will she. She doesn’t want to ruin it for her siblings. I don’t feel we are propigating a lie, we are enjoying Christmas with children.

 

[He_Man]

Yep, seems way too overly scrupulous to me. Almost laughable, except that it was asked with a serious intent, so we are giving it such.

 

[Neil_Anthony]

When I was a kid I had doubts about Santa Claus but I felt it was wrong to doubt the religious stories I learned from my parents about Jesus and Santa Claus. So I defended God and Santa Claus to my friends in spite of their ridicule.

Eventually, my parents explained to me that these were just stories for kids! Well, some of them… like Noah’s ark and santa, but not the Resurrection. I’m still not sure if the nativity stories are like Santa or like the resurrection.

 

[jman507]

Again, I have my doubts as to whether or not it is even a venial sin.

Like I said, that would make statements like “Mommy will never leave you” a venial sin. It doesn’t compute.

Either way, I wouldn’t sweat it.

I’m with you on this one. I pretty sure it was about a year ago I said what I wanted to on the subject, but I’ll say it again. There is a lot you can do with the Santa story, and you can take it and bring it to the child at their level. There mind and thinking is constantly growing more complex, by the time they can actually have a strong understanding of the complexity of the approach and the points that should be impressed from it is the time to explain the whole thing as is. There are a lot of other stories that wouldn’t be approach with the same act of realness, but in this case the points that can be gleaned from the story are so much more powerful, I think the measures are in correct proportion to justify Santa.

In another way, a lot of people with anthropomorphise God to children. It certainly isn’t quite correct in the way it is, but in order to reach them at their level, still with their major thinking patterns in strictly concrete methods, it gives them the best idea of God. You cannot extactly try to speak to the exact nature of the Trinity. But why do that until they are capable of pondering it, and through out the most practical guide to how to best live your life in the process?

 

[whatevergirl]

My husband and I were talking about this last night. He told the kids…don’t bring your kids someday around mommy at Christmas time…she’ll tell them Santa doesn’t exist. Not true! I would never tell them this… When my kids were little, I was not the one who told them Santa didn’t exist…I believe kids at school did, and then they ‘checked’ at home with us. My dh and I never said that he didn’t exist, but that the spirit of Christmas is in the giving…part of the season. (So, why don’t adults believe in Santa then? We are the ones giving?)

I don’t equate it with a lie, per se, but saying that someone else bought our children toys, when it was us, looking back…I’m not sure why we carried that farce on for so long. But, my kids always viewed Santa as magical…Christmas as a time of hoping and wishing…Now that they are older, they of course, view it as a time of welcoming Christ into the world…into our hearts. They love Advent more than Christmas. I remember last year when Advent came to an end…my daughter said…I’ll miss that.

But, if you want to tell your children about Santa…I think that it’s all part of the magic…but, I don’t see why we as parents feel it’s necessary to tell our kids this ‘tale’ when they’re little. I wonder what have happened had I not told my kids this, when they were younger? lol

 

[rinnie]

**** I Dont Think It Is A Sin. You Arent Trying To Hurt Anyone. Kids Dont Get To Be Kids Too Long. If It Is A Sin Im Sure God Will Understand. When I Feel It Is A Sin To Lie Is When You Are Trying To Start Trouble. Or Hurt People.

We Told Our Kids You Dont Believe You Dont Receive. Hey They Are 21 And 24 And They Swear They Still Believe.